Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #02262-F072: Cold Revenge by Proxy (Number 238)

Simply a story over a bloodthirsty psychopath, who listens to classical music, while ripping the faces of his enemies off and bathing in their blood.

Simply put, a normal Monday morning for him at work. -- Anon Guest

There is something to be said about Chamber Music. It inspires the mind. It lifts the spirits. It's an excellent counterpoint to the screams of your enemies. As an aficionado, I know it was originally created to provide a pleasant background to high society hobnobbing. Proof one could afford musicians to play just so the performance could be talked over.

I pity those ancient musicians, sometimes. Imagine that poor luckless soul, working on their art just so they could sit in a corner and watch people ignoring their performance. I suppose it paid the rent. Maybe they didn't care. Maybe they were convinced that this was the best they could expect out of life. No wonder the revolutions came.

I'm merely a revolution of one. A singular performer in an opus made of blood and skin. A literal once-in-a-lifetime experience for those I render. I am sent against those who are an affront to civilisation. It's only fitting that they get to observe the beauty of it before they expire. Of course they don't appreciate my art. The fact that it's rendered in their blood and flesh might have something to do with it.

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A Weekend of Nothing

I have nothing planned for this weekend. An entire forty-eight hours of nowhere to go, nothing to do, and everything centred around just hanging out to chill.

I'm loving it.

I got to get one episode further through Critical Role, watched some more Umbrella Academy with Beloved and added an ep of MacGuyver because we were out of brainpower for the evening.

I also got to make an interesting discovery about Minecraft.

Old hats at the game will remember the introduction of

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Challenge #02261-F071: They Love to Sing-a

"When an eel bites your thigh,

then you bleed out and die,

thats a Moray"

Humans will parody anything they like and especially catchy songs.

Even National Anthems. No matter the origin. -- Anon Guest

The local Humans were having an Untalent Show at the Choose Your Poison Drink[1], wherein all participants imbibed a lot of alcohol, got up onto the in-house stage, and demonstrated something they were horrible at. Either that, or it was Two Drink Minimum Karaoke Night. It

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Would'a Should'a Could'a

I could'a shown more sympathy for the families and survivors of the latest nastiness in New Zealand. I could'a written a thing about this mad state of affairs and done my take on it... but...

Sir Terry Pratchett (GNU) said it all so much better in a footnote:

Every society needs a cry like [”Remember Koom Valley“], but only in a very few do they come out with the complete, unvarnished version, which is ‘Remember-the-atrocity-committed-against-us-last-time-that-will-excuse-the-atrocity-that-we’re-about-to-commit-today! And so on! Hurrah!’ — Thief of

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Challenge #02260-F070: The Answer

42 is the answer to everything.

Aliens meet a fan of the series and are baffled, that 42 is the correct answer to every problem on their ship.

Coincidence or Joke ? -- Anon Guest

"Whoa. That's gotta be forty-two comets in a V-formation," stated Human Dug. Later assessment revealed that they were correct. There were exactly forty-two cometary masses grouped together and orbiting this particular sun.

This was a peculiarity of Human Dug. Forty-two was always the answer, and it always was

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Slow Progress

Things... are chugging along. I'm into the final stretch of B'Nar, I've reached the point in my TangleBag(tm) is almost taller than it's ball of origin, and people apparently really liked my last Wordpress Wednesday. Huzzah.

...now if only the nice folks in Hollywood would notice this shit.

I know. I know. I am but one voice in the wilderness, yaddah yaddah. I would like to think that someone, maybe even a capital letter Someone, is out there and taking a

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Challenge #02259-F069: Got an Axe to Grind

The most destructive and deadly weapon of all is not an antimatter bomb. That place goes to a Human with ductape, a Multitool, a Target and no reason to not do it.

Or to care for his safety. -- Anon Guest

Humans have a lot of sayings concerning revenge. This should be enough warning for most species, but there are always an unfortunate few who are slow learners. Suffice to say that if your commanding officer decides to blast an isolated Human

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I dun goofed

I successfully posted my Patreon, explaining the "Job's Done!" effect. I successfully did my Wordpress Wednesday about the Miraculous Minority and their seemingly obligatory position as Straight White Hero Support(tm). I successfully wrote my blog, my Instant, and five hundred words for my novel.

Yay.

I completely forgot about writing the flash fanfiction I should have done yesterday.

Can't win 'em all.

However, I do aspire to writing two for the price of one, this fair morrow. That should make up

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Challenge #02258-F068: MacGuyvering the Excrement...

A human uses a fire extinguisher, some glue, self-made rocket fuel, some ductape, bolts and other stuff to render an enemy vessel useless.

Be creative :-) -- Anon Guest

[AN: I always am, Nonny. You don't have to tell me]

"Okay," panted Human Ange. "Good news, bad news. Good news... we're alive so far. Yay." It was statements of alleged optimism like that that helped earn Humanity's reputation in the Alliance.

"Bad news," stated Gaurx, "We are sheltering in a supplies hold.

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Whoopsidoodle

I forgot the Patreon stuff, yesterday.

I'm due to make a Wordpress Wednesday, today. Based entirely on your lovely votes. Results as promised below:

(Shown here: Strawpoll results with "Tropes I Despise - The Miraculous Minority" as the clear winner with three votes. Other options: "Eugenics Gets Evolution Wrong," "Autism and Me (four parter)," "Gender Imbalance in the Romcom," and "Why Must They Go There?" having one vote each. The remaining three options got no votes)

So the seven of you who

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Challenge #02257-F067: Terrans of the Deep

Human talk about their oceans flora and fauna and deep water creatures.

Needless to say, it only adds more reasons, why Humans and their Deathworld should have been classified way higher. -- Anon Guest

Humans love to explore. To them, nothing is more alluring than the path not taken, the nook unchecked, or the depths undelved. There is no length a Human will not go to in order to see what's there just because they can. It should therefore surprise few that,

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Do the Re-organise Shuffle

Chaos starts swimming lessons, this week. I'm 1000% for. Anything that could plausibly save my little darlings' lives gets my vote. Since the lessons happen on Wednesday, that's moved up her tuck shop day to Tuesday.

That's happening this week.

The TangleBag(tm) now has starter walls. It's quicker to do the walls than it is to do the base because trebles are no longer involved. I've gone through three circuits since yesterday and it's starting to look like a wibbly wobbly

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Starting Over and Over

I had to unravel a lot of progress on my ameteur string bag. Starting with a simple fact - I got my treble stitch wrong.

You're supposed to make a stitch out of the loop of yarn you wind around the hook. I forgot that bit and just left a loose loop in there. No wonder the result was an unholy tangle.

It's kind of a tangle now, with the spare twine currently residing in a spare gift bag that was lying

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Challenge #02256-F066: First to Aid

A book written by an alien Medic over humans and their needs (physical/emotional/etc) medical "normal" procedures/operations for them, limits of humans (go wild and have fun with this one^^) and what to do with your human if sh*t hits the fan and emergency medical procedures (Bringing him back to life by smashing repeatedly his ribcage and forcing air in, stopping leaks, treating rocket fuel burn( how did he even get this?!?) , etc.)

Have fun and do your thing

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Your vote matters!

In things political, of course, but also for this nonsense. In this case, I want to know what you want to see out of me by this Wednesday.

Vote here and vote often. I'll be checking.

It's another unfuckening day, and I need money to bribe educate Mayhem into learning how to drive proper. Poor lad's got the quirbles again, so he's getting a minimum of one day off because quirbles.

Of course I'll be asking if he's been taking his meds.

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