Become a Patron!

InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 6771 posts

Challenge #02047-E223: Place Your Bets

I have a lot of questions about this and I want none of them answered. -- TheDragonsFlame

There was a segment of vine in the isolation chamber. Recognisable as a section of The Glunk only by its unique hue. Spotted along it were black dots. Arranged underneath it were sections of Known Station Building Material.

There was also a betting pool board instead of algorithms on the whiteboards that were left there for those who liked to think in physical space.[1] Even the usual comic doodle had been erased from the betting pool. Instead, there were bets on teams; Asshole, Bastard, Cack, Dummins and Excreta.

"There's a ten percent increase in Team Asshole," said one of the scientists working in this particular laboratory. "Team Dummins is behind by two percent. Team Cack is bringing up the rear."

"Bets are still on the board until they spill on the no-no," another reminded them. "Come on Exxy..."

Support me on Patreon / Buy me a Ko-fi

Continue Reading

Prompts remaining: 30 Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!

Friday Fun

Mayhem has new travel arrangements. He's riding as far as Beloved's work, and then catching public transit the rest of the way to the new digs in Toowong. Then doing that in reverse on the way home.

Which means I don't have to drive anywhere at all.

I just hang out at home all day and only make appearances for Miss Chaos' bus.

Best. Day. Of the week. Officially.

At least for hopeless hermit me. Who would much rather be chilling in

Read more »

Challenge #02046-E222: Mundane Profundity

http://avita-creator.tumblr.com/post/175729151210/theshitpostcalligrapher-mysteryseeker

For these are the hidden gems of the time known as the shitpost era of the Internet, and are now treated in our spacefaring days, as they treated their own classical texts of Shakespeare and Marlowe. -- Anon Guest

It was a cross-stitch sampler in a frame, and it had profound words carefully sewn into the underlying fabric. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. Next to

Read more »

Making Time

So much can occupy a mind. In my case, The Adventure Zone, Mumbo Jumbo, and a bunch of like-minded nerds on Discord.

They ate my morning.

I have ten minutes or less to do this, post something, and get my kids pointed in the correct direction for school. Huzzah.

And the Ekka Flu this year is (a) looking like a digestive bug and (b) attacking my insides. Fun times for your local 'Nutter.

I still have to do my Wordpress Wednesday, too.

Read more »

Challenge #02045-E221: What is Owed

(Person 1): "Ok, let's get one thing straight."

(Person 2): "Yes?"

(Person 1): Straightens painting hanging on wall -- TheDragonsFlame

Thief hunkered in a corner. She didn't know what she was thinking when she saved this Mage from the brigands, but now they feared their anger. Mages were glass cannons, it was true, but they were also vengeful shits who could turn -say- a kobold Rogue into a toad or worse. And Thief had lived her entire, brief life in fear of

Read more »

I Hate Ekka Week

Turns out the Wednesday I thought we all had off is only applicable to Beloved because Ekka Week Be Fucked Up. Ugh.

And I suspect I keep forgetting this lesson every goddamn year.

My brain is like a sieve, dear readers. And things like "Day off" get stuck when knowledge like "not a day off" just fall through the gaps.

Sigh.

I should just focus on writing stories. I know where I am with those.

Read more »

Challenge #02044-E220: One Post-Near-Wipe-Experience in a Dark and Dismal Dungeon

(Person 1): You Idiot!

(Person 2): I'm sure you're right, but why? -- TheDragonsFlame

"Okay," sighed Fanrel. "From the top. We're rescuing villagers from an evil cult that's into blood sacrifices. We use out best stealth to creep up on them while they're busy with the chanting. We're all nearly in position... and then you decide to leap up, scatter marbles all over the place and yell, 'Oo ma, oo ma, I can see your nickie-nahs'."

"It disrupted the ceremony," protested Jorgax.

Read more »

Day Off, Day On, Day Off...

Today, everyone is back to the grindstone. Assuming there aren't the massive amounts of sickies being chucked because who wants a week like this, right?

If there's ever a campaign to make the entire Ekka Week a holiday, I'm in. Just because of this shit.

My little darlings are both ready to rock and roll. Which makes a pleasant change from the death scenes of the week prior. Mayhem continues to claim he's cured and we're all working hard to get him

Read more »

Challenge #02043-E219: Through th' Crack's Mirror

Humans had lost against the Fae. The Orcs, and Fairies, Gnomes, and Centaurs, all the "mythical" creatures had banded together and drove us to near extinction. But unlike us, they weren't monsters. We had after all started the war. And the small group of survivors, stripped of magic, were sent to a reality where no natural magic existed. Banished to the fringes, that's where our stories came from, an attempt to keep the history before alive. And remember the times that the

Read more »

Ekka Week

It's the most... fuck'd up-ish tiiiiimmmme of the yeeaaarrrr...

Monday: Chaos stays home and Mayhem goes to school
Tuesday: Mayhem stays home and Chaos goes to school
Wednesday: Public holiday for Queenslanders. Everyone stays home
Thursday: Everybody back to what passes for the normal schedule
Friday: Mayhem off to his new Traineeship workplace. Huzzah

And then next week, everyone comes down with the Ekka Flu. Yay.

It happens with every big gathering of like-minded weirdoes. People go even when they're feeling crummy

Read more »

Challenge #02042-E218: Something's Happening Here

Love your Humans are space Orcs, especially the ones about Ozzies.

Here is one for you, How even without luck, all humans get gut feelings, warning of unseen dangers and how they can drive out decisions especially in rather precarious situations. -- Adam in Darwin

[AN: Never sweat your spelling. If I can grok your meaning, I'll correct that biz for the post. Hope you haven't gone troppo waiting for this post to happen, and have a Gaytime on me :D ]

Certain

Read more »

Lazy Sunday

Nowhere to go. Nothing to do if I got there. No money to afford anything because spending spree yesterday.

Jamaican chocolate cheesecake is very rich and very dense and I may spend weeks whittling mine down to next to nil. The rest of my family aren't fans. On one hand: more chocolate for me. On the other... Carbs are a weekends-only occupation. Boo.

I plan to freeze any remaining slices so that they don't go off in the interim.

Mayhem claims he's

Read more »

Challenge #02041-E217: Cautious Welcome

How would aliens with different lifespans play out alongside humanity? Can you please do an alien (instead of dog) version of this post? https://www.reddit.com/r/wholesomememes/comments/5wz4gy/wearelikeelvesto_dogs/

Thanks! -- Anon Guest

For generations, Thack has watched over us. He is our Human and we are his crew. He has seen us all born. He has wept as we all passed of old age at anywhere between fifteen and twenty. He has taught

Read more »

Teh PLN

Step 1: Wait for Beloved to drag self out of bed
Step 2: Go fetch them chicken thighs
Step 3: Also cheesecake, cream, and goopy naughty foods for some weekend indulgeance
Step 4: Play time!

Read more »

Challenge #02040-E216: Just One Thing

If it exists, there's probably a Wikipedia page about it. -- TheDragonsFlame

When the Sky People left, they left behind the Thing. It was flat, and it could bend, and it would not break. It was not food, and it was not a tool, but the Sky People had touched it a lot, so it had to be important.

Thorn poked at it the way she had seen the Sky people do. The figures that came up meant little to her, but

Read more »