Bread Day

A 9-post collection

Bread, bread, bread, bread....

Queensland has very sensibly closed its borders to New South Wales since NSW was silly enough to just announce "fuck it" and open its borders with Victoria again.

This news happening a mere 48 hours after several announcements where NSW and Victorian sporting teams are being sent north to Queensland. Possibly for health reasons.

I say this now:

FUCK. THAT. SHIT.

Don't do it. Do not let them into Queensland. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200, that won't even buy you a coffee order for five people these days. Jeesh.

TIL: Survivors of "mild" cases of Covid-19 are more likely to have LINGERING HEART DAMAGE. This plague is the gift that keeps on giving... terrifying comorbs and lingering after-effects that will hit all sufferers directly in the budget.

The US idiot in charge of education, Betsy-Wetsy DuVos, claims that >14K dead kids is "acceptable losses" when it comes to getting schools back to functioning status during the epoch of plague that has become this year.

In brighter news, the Muppet is apparently not allowed to Tweet any more. That may mean an increased number of plague-spreading rallies where he spouts bullshit to everyone. Or just using twitter via various surrogates.

I bet he's gone golfing again to take his mind off it.

I have Ingrid Starter bulking up to make bread today, and a whole lotta nonsense to plough through in the between times.

This is my rough agenda:

  • Blog & Instant
  • House unfuckening
  • Bread in progress
  • Acquire pool noodle (I'll explain later)
  • Inspect marketplace for replacement phone as mine is playing up
  • Retrieve main compy from repairs (that's what the pool noodle is for)
  • Acquire cream (I need it)
  • Acquire car battery (I was dumb, okay?)

As it turns out, Apple iMacs are (a) heavy and (b) sharp. The pool noodle will be cut to size so I can haul that MF from where the Apple Shop is to wherever I managed to find a park.

I may yet say "Fuckit" and use the valet.

I have attempted to enlist Mayhem's help, but if he falleth asleep, I may have to attempt enlisting Beloved.

Neither of whom have shown very much interest in making bread.

AUGH.

Why does everything around me have to go wrong?

It's 3AM. Whee!

I've been awake for two hours. Since it's also Bread Day(tm), I have used my time to feed the Starters [now named Wilson and Ingrid. Wilson is the all-wholemeal Starter, and Ingrid is the one from the Instructions I found somewhere on the interwebs] and begin the process of Bread.

I also have savoury crackers planned, so that's going to be "fun".

Beloved just came in to say "goodnight" and I told them I had Ingrid on my desk.

Today also

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Bread Day Secundus

The bikkies turned out more like scones with bits in. Meh. They'll be all right with butter or whipped cream. There's a little of that too-much-stevia aftertaste, but I don't find it deplorable.

I might be the only one.

Time will tell.

The dough I made yesterday is thawing and proofing before the big form and bake that will be happening later today. I shall also ask Beloved to slice one loaf when it is done. Maybe that will improve the rate

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Bread Day, and adventures in Recipes

I did wake up at 11PM the previous night, but since I needed a nap at 4PM, I figured I should attempt that thing called a proper night's rest. Translated, I forgot that it was Thursday night and didn't feed the starters.

I have looked up a bikkie recipe that uses sourdough and it promised to be fast and easy... then one of the instructions says "Let sour for eight hours". Fab.

Well, I am going to spend two days on bread

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Friday. Loaf time.

We were almost out of bread, the last of the extant sourdough had gone the way of all mortal things. Mould. Dang. Then this morning, at what I affectionately call "f-off o'clock", I was woken by the delicate clanging of my measuring cups.

Turns out, my Beloved was making kit bread. On the very eve of the day that I would be making more sourdough. They're doing it to use up the kit bread supplies, including the dry yeast we have lying

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Bread Day and Muffins

Today I am making wholemeal loafs to go out to others not me. One for Chaos' teacher and one for Capt. S at her insistence. The starter harvest, gathered closer to midnight last night than the dawn, has gone into an attempt at Health Muffins(tm) that also utilise the bruised and wrinkly apples that miss Chaos no longer wishes to go near.

Recipe will be appearing in my foodie blog as soon as I care to document them.

I am, however,

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Two-parter Bread Days, I guess

So here's the thing with sourdough:

  1. You need to give your starter time to rise before you use it.
  2. This takes a majority of the morning.
  3. When you do use it, there's still mixing the dough and letting it sit for a while (aka Autolysing) before you add it to your stuff.
  4. Then there's stretching and folding at set intervals [1/2 hour to 1 hour depending on your mood, what the dough likes, etc] which you do a minimum of four
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Friday. It's time for bread

So. This morning so far is:

  • Feed cats
  • Consult with Beloved visavis bread making [it's white loaves this time]
  • Feed starters
  • Make pancakes out of harvest for Chaos
  • Realise that Chaos wants to eat them at home (fml)
  • See Chaos off to school
  • Finish making the pancakes
  • Prep for bread [weighing, sifting, containing]
  • Finally have coffee and pills
  • Unfuckening the house
  • And now I get to sit down and work for a change

It's been a busy morning, and I still haven't

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Hello, Rock. Hello, Hard Place...

The two week grace period is nearly done. If there's no signs of coughs or sniffles, I am sending Chaos back to school and doing the decontamination noise when she comes home.

I've encountered a further embuggerance as my Medium account is under investigation and I can't post until things are fixed. I'm moving as lickety-darn split as I can, but I'm also editing THREE YEARS OF INSTANTS so that the sig no longer contains solicitations for funds.

Honestly, it might be

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