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Dog

A 20-post collection

Challenge #01578-D117: What if Dog Was One of Us?

:A god is in the shape of a doggo, to travel the mortal realm: Using godly powers for pets FTW -- RecklessPrudence

People often wonder what it would be like if the Almighty came to earth to see the hatred and strife that humanity perpetuates on itself. What people forget is that God is love. And there is only one mortal form that holds only pure and unconditional love. It has four legs, and a waggy tail.

Grace was not thinking any of this as she sat on the stoop, freshly evicted, with all the personal belongings she was allowed to keep in a cardboard box. No job. No hope. Not even money for a meal. And the growing fear that she would die on this stoop and nobody would care. So far, she had yet to stop crying.

And something licked her hand.

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Dry run day today

It’s Friday. The last school day before I’m off to strange lands.

So, of course, I’m making Hubby do everything I usually do whilst I’m here to supervise ‘cause I’m a paranoid B.

So far he’s woken up Chaos [Autistic, age 6] to come on a walk with him, Mayhem and the hound, and then left her lag behind 'cause I was there to hold her hand. Not encouraging,

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Now the internet is fixed...

I’m not diverting the ponies. They have served their purpose in keeping a nice, long queue for me.

Besides, I’m likely to fill up my queue with Thailand stuff anyway.

Got Hubby to walk the dog with me, this morning. As always, his ideas of hound control and mine differ greatly. And as always, his are super effective. When I get back, I’m going to have to use them.

In the great field of canid-related expenses,

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After eleven days of ponies...

You get this. An explaination as to why eleven days of ponies.

Long story short, the Internet died at home and I can no longer rearrange my posts, and posting more is a pain in the arse on my mobile devices.

But fret not, loyal followers! Soon, I shall be posting from/about Thailand! Pretty pictures, ahoy. Diatribes about why can’t we do X possibly accompanying same.

And in other news, the Hound has reached a point of annoyance where

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Two problems, one solution

I’m moderately proud of myself, this morrow [7th April] as I found two problems with one solution.

Since we had the jungle lawn slashed down to lawnlike levels, we’ve had a LOT of grass lying around in clumps. Including clumps near the fence, which threatens the wood palings.

We also have a lot of pit traps where Hound decided to imitate Simon from the Yogscast and diggy diggy hole.

So early in the morning, before the sun decided

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Kids are coming home, soon.

My week off is nearly over. Soon, it shall be back to the slog of chasing after two kids and a dog and bitching about various life trials.

Good news: It means I’ll have blogging material again [seriously, you’re all two posts away from ponies as I write].

Bad news: I’ll have two shoulder surfers and a hound to worry about.

But I also have Plans. One is a trip to the cinemas for good behaviour

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So I've arranged a little something in my queue...

Basically, I had nothing to write, yesterday [27th Feb] and queued up all my attempts at Doctor Whooves care of Generalzoi’s pony maker flash-toy. Then I found out I did have something to say and had to rearrange things.

‘Cause who wants eleven days of ponies before you get to find out stuff?

…okay, so some folks might want to see it. Desperately. I can promise you it’s not that magical. Really.

So from now on,

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Drama Llama is moving in....

The dog somehow got into my car. He chewed the back seat. He chewed the driver’s seat belt. He didn’t get into anything else, thank goodness, but I’ve been packing death.

It could have put the kibosh on my travel plans.

Thanks to the blithe spirits, the insurance mob told me they’d spring for everything shy of $500. Ouch. But not so much ouch as total replacement would have cost sans insurance.

I need

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As the Drama Flies: episode 2

As you may be aware from the previous episode, I have been invited to Thailand for a few weeks, and also begun the process towards getting a passport.

This involves getting hold of a registrar’s office official copy of my birth certificate and my marriage licence. Which means getting hold of the department of births, deaths and marriages.

Sure, you can get lots of information online, but you can’t order a copy of your own ID papers.

I

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As the Drama Flies...

I usually name my mythical soap operas _All My [NOUN]s_, mad-lib style. But my life is definitely As the Drama Flies. And believe me, it’s flying pretty damn low, right now.

Got some expensive and some not-so-expensive stuff to try and train the hound not to chew shit he shouldn’t chew. Neither of said stuff is waterproof.

Gave selfsame stuff to Hubby and Mostly Shiftless. It hasn’t been seen since.

It rained.

Dog decided to

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The hazards of dog-walking

Before the weeks of deluge, I alternated blocks to walk the hound around. Let’s call them Clockwise and Anticlockwise.

And a couple of times, I even managed to do both.

That was before we evicted the Carpet From Hell [it wasn’t paying rent], the subsequent stint of bad asthma, and a rainstorm just short of another effing flood.

Now I’m back to one block until I’m absolutely, positively certain that my health is up

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Poor dog

The hound has taken to racing up and down the yard in the rain. I have only just figured out why.

He’s looking for his people.

Unfortunately for the hound, his people - Mayhem and Chaos - are back at school. Until it floods out with all this fargnaxing rain.

So in order to keep him at least dry, I’ve had to keep the front door open so he knows I’m around. Poor thing’s

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Progress and AntiProgress

Sir Terry Pratchett argued convincingly that everything must have it’s opposite. Not just the light-dark opposite, but the opposite that goes through the conventional, traditional opposite and out the other side.

We have progress. What I’m having is a kind of anti-progress that has gone through retention and out the other side.

I am getting fit enough to take the dog around two blocks -yay- BUT, on the anti-progress side, I’ve been struck from asthma as

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Ow.

I’m going to have to work on leash-training the hound at home. Lord knows I lack the capability when out on our morning constitutional.

I left the check chain at home this morning. It wasn’t working to stop him tugging, and it was just hurting him.

Just the ordinary leash on his harness hurt my wrist from the near-constant pulling, but then I don’t matter.

I’m just a human.

Still, walking every day will

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