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InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12594 posts

Saturday, Day Zero, Nonsense

Two new cases today, taking the total cases up to twelve, today. I did not check the totals yesterday, hence the difference.

I'm still not going near the headlines without a 40' barge pole. It's bound to be crabonkers out there. 'Tis the season.

Today, at a later hour, I shall be driving MeMum back to her humble abode. An event which poor Jolie is looking forward to because she hates it when strangers are in the house. Poor little fuzzball's terrified of new people.

I gave her her tuna loin treat this morning. Hopefully treats will be associated with Strangers In The House and she might get a little braver as time progresses. I can hope.

Speaking of hope, let's try and get a story done before the chauffeur gig.

Challenge #02905-G348: Fresh Out of the (Brain) Pan

A gingerbread man lives in a gingerbread house. Is the house is made of flesh, or Is he made of house? He screams for he does not know. -- Anon Guest

[AN: I do recall a comic on this theme, so it is hard to not riff on that. No, it's not the one you referenced.]

Sugar, spice, everything nice, a modicum of flour. All the things that make a treat. Hands moulded them into shapes. Imagination gave them life. Well. Some

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Thursday, Day Zero, PLN'ng

So here's the agenda:

  1. Unfuck the house
  2. Fetch MeMum

Somewhere in there, I get to:

  1. Write my instant.

This is placed in order of importance. Whether today's story appears sometime before nightfall or soon-to-now.

Muppet now has a tinfoil-hat level conspiracy theorist arguing voter fraud in court. I wonder where I can livestream the judges laughing at this. He's going to keep on going, ISTG... "save your MAGA hats, the Muppet will rise again" etc. Bleurgh.

Let's see what I can do

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Challenge #02904-G347: Ancient Terran Humour

trust me -- Anon Guest

[AN: Link leads to a black page with a purple button that also reads TRUST ME. If you click it, you get a page full of the Pokemon Ditto dancing to The Conga. You will definitely get fired if you're caught viewing this in the office]

This was a vault made by Humans. The way to get through varying doors was to solve puzzles involving bits of Human culture that -according to the Humans who made it-

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Wednesday, Day One, Hunkering

Tomorrow, I am unfuckening the house, then going on a cross-country expedition to bring MeMum over for the holiday. The story will happen later, if I don't manage to squeeze it in before I take off.

Fully expect to not see it until WAY later in the day. Yuletide traffic is always a bitch. I can try to keep it brief, but you should all know by now that the story takes me where it wants to go and if that happens

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Challenge #02903-G346: Don't Do It

Five Times Human Pib got Stuck and Needed to be Rescued, and One Time Human Pib did the Rescuing. -- Anon Guest

[AN: Mandatory callback link Which is but one tale among many.]

Fact: The Humans aboard the Jaunty Merchant had reproduced. This was not a great impact on the functioning of the ship as a whole until their spawn, a Human named Pib, learned to move around independently. Human Pib, in short succession, learned problem-solving skills and fast became a problem

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Tuesday, Day Zero, Patreon

Queensland's closed its borders again because -join the chorus- entitled visitors from overseas have skipped past quarantine protocols and caused yet another outbreak down south.

One new case. Ten active cases. At least the potential for Karens is sinking.

Sigh.

There's mutation in Europe that has OF COURSE made its way to the USA because there's no such thing as safety protocols in the States. We may need a second vaccine. We may need a series of vaccines. For all we know

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Challenge #02902-G345: Escape By Mercy

They had nothing to give, no funds what so ever. With them was their youngest sibling, unable to move due to the injuries so severe that even the best medicine around could not fix it. Their only hope were the B'Nari. The sibling wept, feeling terrible because their beloved family was going through so much for them since the accident. But kept being assured that it was the least they could do since the injuries which caused the complete paralysis of the

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Monday, Day Zero, Mistakes are being made

Not only is there an outbreak in Sydney, but there's a deadline for Queenslanders to get back into Queensland with no obvious decrees to self-isolate afterwards.

I'm giving it a maximum of three weeks before we get a "fucking whoops" out of this.

GDI public health is more important than one public holiday. FFS. If they ban road travel tomorrow, I'll roll with that. Because PUBLIC HEALTH ALSO INCLUDES ME.

We have eleven total cases, with two new ones from overseas. That's

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Challenge #02901-G344: Vocal Gymnastics

The human spoke in a half-whisper as they were going through the jungle trying to skirt the edges of a hostile camp. Normally, they'd be 'kick backside and take names' but they were carrying a wounded havenworlder with them and could not risk their friend. Damnit, if only the life pod's transmitters had worked! No use for it, they knew where the rescue ship would be, but the hostiles were not going to make it easy.

Their friend then noticed the voice

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Sunday, Day One, PLNs

Toasty did some lovely work towards their planned fid Days which is allegedly lower effort than Lion. Allegedly. I swear they spent twenty minutes figuring out gradients for one frame. Much distraction was had and given by all.

It happens that way sometimes.

Sometimes, you need to faff about to get a great idea. Sometimes, you just need to chill. This morning was one of those times for Toasty. It may be one of those mornings for me. I can't tell from

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Challenge #02900-G343: The Benevolence Gene

On Earth, in the 20th and 21st century, they had the Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes. The winner won a certain amount that was paid in weekly payments for the rest of the person's life as well as an advance of a lump sum. This continued even after the Shattering. In addition to fairly inexpensive products, the PCH's contest continued. And once again, a new winner was chosen. Though it sometimes took a little bit to find the winner when people traveled to

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Saturday, Day Zero, Nonsense

Three new cases, but the total is down to eleven and all cases are from overseas. There's outbreaks in Sydney and once again the Queensland borders are closed.

Sigh.

I'm picking MeMum up on Yulemas Eve. A day that shall also include some tech support nonsense to help with apps and other malarky. Everyone wants everyone to use the app these days and MeMum is an old-school luddite who has only just recently got used to googling stuff.

Sorry, Mum, but it's

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Challenge #02899-G342: The Evidence Speaks For Itself

Shortly after their receive a shipment of stolen parrots, alien smugglers learn that pet parrots tend to repeat some of the most common phrases they have heard the hard way. There are some things that should never be heard, and can never be unheard. -- Anon Guest

"Captain Fresk is going to panic," said a voice. It sounded a lot like crewmate Jori, but it came, seemingly, from the cage of brightly-coloured exotic Deathworlder avian that they had successfully stolen from Brightwing

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