Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Slow recovery and horrible green things

I'm pretty sure my virus is done. Hooray. I'm still coughing up things ranging from chartreuse to pea-green, including a random few bronchial casts1. And first thing in the morning, some of my ejecta is so dark that it could double as scabs.

Hooray for night-time drying effects? I guess?

And for those of you who are watching my weight with concern, I actually wobbled upwards by 0.1 of a kilo and am holding steady in the 84 kilo range. And I have graphs to back up the fact that I am not, in fact, killing myself with this "new fad diet" 9_9 [actually, it's a case of everything old being new again]

[Shown here: A graph of my weight gains and losses with a vertical, dividing line at a peak marked 88.8 kilos. There is also a bolder trend line over the paler, zig-zagging, actual weight]

That vertical line in the image above shows the day I started on Keto. As you can see, I have valleys and peaks on the actual weight line, and a general slope downwards with the odd plateau on the trend line. That steep cliff right at the end? That's largely due to me not eating because Lurgi.

I expect a clamber upwards for a little while and then resume the general downwards trend as things even out. As with all dieters, I share my successes, even when they're a statistical blip.

And before you ask, the dotted blue line with the star on it is the goal I set for myself when I weighed a hundred kilos, back in 2013. I haven't updated it yet to the new Ideal BMI weight2 of 70 kilos, because I figure it's achievable on this new diet, but I will be happy at whatever equilibrium I reach, come late November of 2018.

But onto more annoying news: Your GP is not allowed to tell you that Keto works, that Keto can help with just about everything (except those pesky bacterial infections, it seems) that a high-carb diet can engender. Your GP has to tow the high-carb, low-fat line or they lose their medical license, they get smeared all over the news, and otherwise made a pariah.

I'm sure billions of dollars from the Monsan-toe-rags and the agricultural associations come into this somewhere. They're making a killing out of this. Financially and literally.

I'm waiting for the day that GP's all over the place pull a Bob Parr and exaggeratedly tell their patients that they just can't advise that they try the Ketogenic diet, with full information for free at the following url... and so forth. And finish by loudly insisting that they keep up with the party line. That would be great.

But that won't happen, belike. Money talks louder than mountains of solid, scientific, documented evidence, so... we just have to put up with things until things finally turn around.

And speaking of turning things around... I have a quack's appointment in a couple of hours, so I'd better wriggle on with my fiction.

  1. grossness warning before you go googling those. They are actual moulds made inside the bronchii with a mixture of existing mucous and excess calcium. And I am possibly the only person on the planet who thinks these things are cool.

  2. Yes. I refer to the BMI as the Bullshit Medical Indicator. And it is bullshit. But it's bullshit that the medical profession is legally obligated to work with, so I'm going to continue Keto until I can prove that everything they know is wrong.

Challenge #01446-C351: Bad Head Day

:Merrily Doing A Thing:

:Pause:

(To myself) "Wait, no. Logic."

:Stops Doing The Thing: -- RecklessPrudence

Brain fog gets to everyone. Even those who do not, strictly speaking, have brains as we know them.

Rael caught himself in early morning lo-cal fog, holding a bread knife over a large cantaloupe. What he had been about to do was unclear but cutting had to be involved.

"This is not right," he told himself. He put the knife down, put the cantaloupe into the

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I'm getting better...

It'd be funnier if I had a picture of myself on a body cart... nevermind.

The lurgi has shifted out of my brain, so at least I'm mentally clear.

My doctor also didn't want to prescribe antibiotics, so I'll be getting rid of green things for some significant time. Which means lots of lemon and ginger tea and lots and lots of salty broth.

With my brain operational, I can now focus on writing a lot better. Alas, I'm still a lot

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Challenge #01445-C350: Instruments of Entertainment

Dedicated to the Steam Calliope. -- Anon Guest

Rael was glad that the Archivaas who were going through the Vault of the 20th Century had finally decided to ship confusing items to Amalgam for analysis, rather than making Shayde, and himself, go all the way to it.

This one... seemed to be an unholy mess of pipes on wheels. There was an unseemly grin buttons and platforms that, on a smaller device, might have been piano keys. It had ornate works of

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Arguing with doctors

As you know, I have Lurgi (I'm almost over it, now), and I went to see the local GP about that and the fact that I'm on the Ketogenic Diet so that my health is duly monitored.

I mentioned it a few times, but I had positive proof that she wasn't listening to me those three times. Because she actually started paying attention (sort of) when I asked her why she wasn't concerned.

And then I got the confusion.

First, the doctor

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Challenge #01444-C349: Instruments of War

Bagpipe players. -- Anon Guest

They say that nobody ever sleeps well in hotel rooms. This is true even when one is forced to bring one's own bed. Rael, as a niche species still battling for independence from his creators, did not expect any hotel to have what he called a bed in stock.

Therefore, on the rare occasions that he travelled, he brought along his heated tank with life-monitoring equipment. It was a routine a part of his luggage as toiletries

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It's Lurgi

It seems like everything hit me at once, and my semi-annual lung trouble decided that this was a fine time to team up with Keto Flu and whatever was going around and make beautiful mucous together.

Translated: I have a bacterial infection in my bronchii.

So I've made an appointment to see a doctor today about getting some antibiotics to make that fuck off. Meanwhile, Beloved and I are making plans to get all the calories we need because our current stomach

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Challenge #01443-C348: Mrs Widgery's Guests

Morris Dancers! To the tune of "Mrs Widgery's Lodger". -- Anon Guest

[AN: For anyone wondering what the flying heck - here you go. I apologise in advance for the mental trauma.]

There were white-clad humans wearing bells on their shins. Each one carried a large, white kerchief in each hand. Except for the one of them that was wrestling an accordion into submission.

The ones with the kerchiefs were skipping about, legs ringing, to the slow and grinding tune.

"What are

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MCT and how it's saved me

You all know how the Keto Flu has been kicking my butt of late. I'm really knocked about because I had a lot of fat stored in random places in by sad old body1.

And with loss of fat cells comes a loss of water weight (because stored fats also lead to water retention) which means peeing a lot, which also means loss of salt.

Which also means my immune system is knocked a bit off-kilter. Which is probably how my

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Challenge #01441-C346: Stranger Friends

Wander and Sylvia

1) With Stanford Pines

2) With Dipper and Mabel -- Anon Guest

[AN: This will put me one ahead for Yule. Huzzah]

The Stan o' War II, somewhere in the Bermuda triangle...

"Engines on full, Stanley! It's got us in its vortex!"

"They're already on full, poindexter. You want more power, grab an oar and paddle."

"Say, you folks look like you're in a spot of trouble," said a new voice.

The speaker was a hairy, orange... thing... seemingly

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Heavy and Light Keto and how it kicks your butt

Beloved and I are doing heavy Keto, which means that we try to take a maximum of twenty grams of carbs per day.

Light Keto, on the other hand, allows you a maximum of fifty grams of carbs and is a lot easier on the body. You can have more ersatz rice or potato mash, for instance, by doing strange things to cauliflower. You can even have really small doses of actual rice or potato.

People doing Light Keto, for instance, never

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Challenge #01440-C345: Trade Agreements

"Are you trying to seduce me!"

"That depends... is it working?" -- OohLookShiny

Zamree sighed. "Mx Frreep... I can see that your plumage is very pretty, but that's not the best way to found a long-term relationship."

"Is trade, is trade," sang Frreep. "Settle business, mate, raise eggs. For good of all."

Oh dear. "Mx Freep... we're incompatible species. The plumbing will not match. Secondly, my kind do not lay eggs. And third, I am life-bonded with another."

Frreep seemed greatly confused,

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Health check

Saturday is Stabbin' Day for me. When I stick a needle in my finger and do the blood-on-a-stick tests to see how well I'm doing.

Ketone level: 1.9 [Ketonic normal is between 0.5 and 5]
Blood Sugar: 4.5 [Human normal is between 4 and 6]

I may have picked up Lurgi1 from Wet'n'Wild, or from dear little Mayhem... or it may be Keto flu. But whatever it is, I'm feeling a little tiny bit rotten this morning.

It

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Challenge #01439-C344: I Said No

A scientist when captured by the bad guys instead of working for them and having their work used for evil, refuses to work for them. They won't be the cause of innumerable deaths even if it means they suffer. SeaDragon1012

Dr Sally Hopkins woke in comfort, which was a big difference from attempting to fight off three attackers in the rain. She kept her eyes closed and her breathing even. Taking stock.

Good news - they had her in comfort. If they

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Saggy, floppy progress

It is week three on Ketogenics and the fat is melting off of me. And, like all weight loss, it's happening head-downwards.

I have skin hanging off me in deceptive lumps - translated, that means my spare tyres are only visible when I'm upright.

And the really good news is that the melting has gone down to butt level. Once that's finished draining, maybe my thighs will shrink down to a more acceptable minimum.

Both Beloved and I are having real trouble

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