Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #02629-G072: Impossible Consequences

Human Dave was an interesting individual. His pack bonding ability is astounding even among his fellow Humans. The downside being where ever Dave goes chaos ensues. Even humans with high restraints have hard time controlling themselves. There are few Humans around Dave that are able to, in human terms “keep a tight leash on him”. I was able to ask one of them about more information about Dave. Saying that him and two other take shifts restraining Dave but whenever the day of Satur comes around it take the forces of all three to hold Dave down, and worry since the breaking of March is coming soon. -- Anon Guest

Some Humans just can't help themselves. They need others to be their sense of restraint or, in extreme cases, act as surrogate brain cells. Some are just... naturally chaotic. They don't always bring devastation in their wake, or they wouldn't last long in the space lanes for increasingly obvious reasons.

Human Dave was the embodiment of the catastrophe curve. When not catapulting from one bad idea to the next, he was happening to any threat that the crew might be encountering. When not dealing with threats, the rest of the Ships' Humans were trying to "keep a lid" on Human Dave's usual shenanigans.

Human Dave was usually friendly towards any non-hostile beings. He could befriend literally anything and frequently did. The heartache and the chaos happened when he inevitably attempted to drag random wildlife onto the scout vessel with him for the trip back to the Surveyor 34Y8.

Support me on Patreon / Buy me a Ko-fi

Continue Reading

Prompts remaining: 83 Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!

Stream Morning!

I'm functioning on a thin chain of naps and a lot of caffeine this morrow. Yeeps.

I owe a thing about my bread since both loaves came out... edible. Not perfect, but at least edible.

Perfection will take time.

Longer than I expect because everyone and their kid brother's dog has emptied the shelves of literally anything that could plausibly be long-term food.

I can only hope that sanity returns before I run out of enough flour to keep my starters alive

Read more »

Challenge #02628-G071: The Last Lie

https://steemit.com/fiction/@internutter/challenge-02005-e181-one-line-to-cross

https://steemit.com/fiction/@internutter/challenge-02156-e327-they-ll-be-back

https://steemit.com/fiction/@internutter/challenge-02524-f334-an-appeal

The "Last Lie" is a recurring trend and well-known trait in the Amalgam universe. Yet, I haven't yet read a story where the "Last Lie" has come true. It seems that our human protagonists always manage to cheat death.

That being said, I think it would be interesting to see a (or a group of) Havenworlder(s) discovering what the Last Lie is the

Read more »

Bread Fail!

People should make their instructions (a) clearer and (b) linear. If you're doing an instructional video for noobs, don't make a big deal out of the allegedly proper way and then mumble something about never doing that in person.

Share. The method. That actually. WORKS!

::Anguished ASD gargling::

So yeah. Instructional video said "use this portion" with way more importance than what the guy who made it actually did. So my dough was too moist and the loaf turned into a roofing

Read more »

Challenge #02627-G070: When You Assume...

Considering the cultural difference between western people and eastern people, how would aliens react to someone from Asia?

Asian people tend to be less touchy-feely, more reserved and quiet than someone from America for example.

How would aliens react when the shy-looking, timid Japanese girl, who joined their ship as a chef, turns out to be a master of martial arts and make dinner from the would-be pirates because they belittled her? Or how loud she gets when she's properly drunk... --

Read more »

Bread Day!

I made starter harvest pancakes and I have one batch of starter growing on the countertop ready to make some firkin multigrain sourdough. YEAH!

I got maybe a half hour before I need to start mixing and whatnot. I shall be measuring some of the important stuff with the house scales after I'm done with the blog.

If you're reading this, there is already bread underway.

Today's nonsense is going to include another episode of Inter-Mission and attempting to refine the backlog

Read more »

Challenge #02626-G069: Patient Persistence

Elephants can paint. It is adorable. They also enjoy music. Also: good at snuggles. -- Anon Guest

Humanity has doubted the intelligence of Elephants in the same way that they doubted the intelligence of Cetaceans. The same is true for the Elephants doubting the Humans for similar reasons to the Cetaceans. However, when the communication barrier was finally surmounted, Humanity was unimpressed.

Some of them had been literally talking to dolphins for subjective centuries[1], and in the dolphins' own language. Getting

Read more »

Fuuuu...

I went to the pet shop to acquire some base essentials, which included kibble, litter, and three packets of sachets.

I forgot the damn kibble.

Hence the title.

Part of today's nonsense involves finishing the podcast off, actually acquiring kibble for my poor starving felines, and rearranging my ENTIRE KITCHEN so I have the space to make bread.

I may surrender to the inertia gods and merely add a vinyl mess mat to the table IDK.

There's something about the recent insanities

Read more »

Challenge #02625-G068: Toxic Under Certain Circumstances

Alien and Human conversation:

A: And Humans keep drinking these?

H: Jup.

A: Even though it can dissolve Rats?

H: Jup, in Moderation.

A: Why?

H: It tastes good.

(/TIL https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/can-mountain-dew-really-dissolve/ The Mouse-Mountaindew-Case) -- Anon Guest

[AN: Offensensitivity warning for the mouse in the Mountain Dew. Food adulteration implications therein.]

Humans are Deathworlders. It should therefore be little shock that they can enjoy consuming toxic substances. Some Humans claim they cannot continue to exist without their daily

Read more »

Shutting down everywhere

Beloved managed to score some limited little luxuries and, by all reports, everything be completely batshit bonkers out there. People are panic-buying ALL sorts of bullshit. I know when I went for my week's ration of ice cream, there was almost NO flour. There were three packets of wholemeal flour, of which I only took one.

I only needed one. So I got one.

Meanwhile, Beloved got SIX firkin packets of eggs. Like, each one is 18 eggs, and they got six

Read more »

Challenge #02624-G067: Seasonal Invasion

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8UFtp_8HAJA

Aka. Ep. 54 "Havenworlder discover Christmas Beetles" -- Mike

[AN: "despite being Australian" is an entire mood NGL]

"It's November," said the guide. "It's Christmas Beetle season." This, seemingly apropos of nothing, was a warning to be taken seriously, since it did come from an Australian about Australian wildlife.

"Are they toxic?" worried Frip. "Venomous, poisonous, or attack-minded?" Frip had learned a lot from their trip to Australia so far. Going to see Australia

Read more »

Welp. It's a crisis...

I'm making a mostly-vegetarian stew because there was no beef available when Beloved went for ingredients. So far, the ingredients include an entire Wombok cabbage, 1.5 kg of "low carb" potatoes [really, love?] and a decent dollop of vegemite.

Next on the chopping block, a decent container of carrots. I'm definitely adding some celeries to offset the potatoes in there. Lots of celeries.

On today's agenda, the Patreon nonsense, blogging about bread, writing the Instant of course, and making a bloody

Read more »

Challenge #02623-G066: Occupational Hazards

A: Human, why are you eating with your off hand?

B: Oh, I sprained my dominant hand. It should be better in a few days, maybe a week.

A: WHAT WERE YOU DOING???

B: Cleaning the walls.

A: What.

B: Well, the kids left hand prints on the walls.

A: Just use the auto-cleaner.

B: Auto-cleaner's not rated for bio-hazardous materials.

A: WHAT DID THEY PUT ON THE WALLS???

B: Their own feces. It was disgusting. They did it while I was

Read more »

Okay. Let's do this!

We have, my Beloved and I, located a one-stop shop where sourdough accessories can be acquired. The problem? Even the closest one is fuck-off far away. 46 kilometers versus 51. South versus North.

Shall consult Beloved about the routes.

Honestly, I think North might be less bother, but more fuel. Things be a little bit nonsensical around here.

On the plus side, I do have enough prepped meals to last me almost a month. If the rest of the family starts eating

Read more »

Challenge #02622-G065: One More Lesson

The Great Chinese Famine (from Wikipedia)

"I went to one village and saw 100 corpses, then another village and another 100 corpses. No one paid attention to them. People said that dogs were eating the bodies. Not true, I said. The dogs had long ago been eaten by the people."

(Yu Dehong, secretary of a party official in Xinyang in 1959 and 1960)

It is widely believed that the government seriously under-reported death tolls: Lu Baoguo, a Xinhua reporter in Xinyang, told

Read more »