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InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12151 posts

Challenge #02067-E243: The Trouble With Gravy

"Unfortunately, gravity is temporarily out, so we're going to have to deal with it and float." -- TheDragonsFlame

"She's not dead," insisted the Nae'hyn Priest/technician. "She's just resting."

Captain Jarth repeated her question, "How. Long. Will it. Take?"

"I tried to warn you that it was a bad idea to transfer a short-haul gravy drive into a long-hauler," said Knekkit, who was ordinarily the translator. Today, she was being the repeater of known facts. "They get used to patterns of behaviour and get obstinate about doing what they're used to. Like trained elephants."

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Kitten plus Disco Ball == me

So many Gottas. So many Dunwannas.

I gotta:

  • do this blog
  • instant story
  • 500 words
  • house cleaning
  • send off a copy of Adapting to Baen Books

I Dunwanna do any of those. I'd much rather wind up that one fic that's been possessing my soul for months now. And then start posting it so I can revel in the suffering of others.

I'd much rather nap all day because wet and miserable weather. And have hot soup and fanfic in-between bingeing my

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Challenge #02066-E242: A Bug in the Peace Process

Aliens: "We don't know why everyone calls humans wild and crazy these guys just huddle together and whisper all the time"

Small band of humans: All terrified of the giant cockroaches but trying very hard not to cause an international incident -- OohLookShiny

They had expected resistance. They had expected a fight. Even though this was clearly a mercy mission, they expected the Humans to 'kick up a stink'. They knew that these were crazed Deathworlders who liked, very much, to keep

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Sneezin', Sneezin', Sneezin'...

Well, it's better than the wheezing, I guess. Probably a lot better. But it sure as shit doesn't feel that way when you're going through an entire box of tissues inside of 48 hours. Which is probably close to what I'm doing.

I barely remembered to do the Patreon stuff, yesterday. I have to cook up something for Wordpress Wednesday before bedtime. That's going to be fun.

I have some ideas from last week I could consider. I could do a piece

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Challenge #02065-E241: Once Upon a Crusade

"There's no such thing as an elephant."

"Then you have some very big wolves on this planet." -- Anon Guest

"Just think about it for a psalm," said Sir Thakkis. "A beast as large as a peasant's hut, walking on legs as thick as trees, with a nose like a serpent and ears like cloaks? It's too ridiculous to live. And, Frog, I have to remind you that we are on a holy quest and your heretical words have no place."

"I

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It's the Most Horrible Time...

At least for my asthmatic arse. Sneezin' and Wheezin' Season has commenced. I can tell by the way my throat feels closed up and I suddenly have a need for my preventers, puffers, and occasional nebuliser doses of my meds.

I have my faithful Max within arm's reach. And I always have a modicum of medication squirrelled away within the cargo space. I've had the better part of my entire life coping with not being able to breathe so this is more

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Challenge #02064-E240: Evac Under Fire

I'll burn that bridge when I get to it. -- TheDragonsFlame

Gorx halted in mid-step. "Surely the Human phrase is, I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Is it not so?"

Human Warin stopped for hir. "Not today. Keep moving. I'll explain on the way." He waited for Gorx to get moving again. "What I just said is a malapropism. A mixing of metaphorical sayings for humour or -in this case- appropriate action." He broke off to race ahead

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Urgle...

I am operating on less than six hours of sleep. Want to know how I know? I play Sunken Secrets on my phone. I sent some balloons away on a six-hour wait-fest before I went to sleep and woke up before they returned.

Needless to say, I am not the happiest of campers, this morrow.

I did a little something productive, ran out of idea, and attempted to return to sleep with mixed results. I got maybe a two-hour nap or less

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Challenge #02063-E239: Barry Critiques Them Afterwards

(Person 1): "So this is how I die... With thunderous applause..."

(Person 2): "Stop being so dramatic." -- TheDragonsFlame

Taako had been through many adventures. He had travelled across a hundred realities. He had bargained away his beauty, his health, and a skill to save the world. But this? This had to be the toughest fight of his life. For example, strictly off the top of his head, the fifteen-point landing he'd just endured because this particular band of necromantic chucklefucks had

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Sdrawckab!

Once again, I got my approach to organisation catty-corner, and did NOT focus on telling y'all about my alleged life before getting rolling on today's Instant.

Which, by the way, tips more than a hat-rack at The Adventure Zone. Spoilers if you haven't listened through.

Listen through, btw. It's full of dick jokes and cussing, but it's funny as hell and you WILL cry. It's one hell of a ride.

Ahem.

Today's plans involve pickling more strawberries and teaching my Beloved to

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Challenge #02062-E238: Magical Progress Goes Twinkle

Unseen University's Hex nails the math for reliable translocation -- Anon Guest

Magic has rules. This is a fact as real as the turtle that swims underneath the world. Or the four elephants on its back that support the entire disk. In order to fly, one must drop an equal weight and really know how to stick the landing. Magic can turn lead into gold, but that gold will make you sick if you hang on to it for too long. For

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Now I'm Pissed Off

Picture the scene: It's the day before yesterday. I put my heart and soul into, and wring myself out for, a piece that by all accounts should have knocked it out of the park.

One comment.

One reblog.

Some handful of likes.

Yesterday, I pretty much put my thumb up my butt and churn out a fill-in-the-blanks WWII Escape The POW Camp plotting.

One redistribution via Free Fiction Daily.

One clap on Medium.

One reblog.

I can argue that my least-effort vaguely-historically-accurate

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Challenge #02061-E237: Escape the Camp

(Person 1): "What did you get in your care package from home?"

(Person 2, happily): "Military-grade explosives!" -- TheDragonsFlame

The weatherproof box said 'Plasticine' and contained some ridiculously disproportionate cartoon characters on it. Inside were wax-paper wrapped blocks of brightly-coloured stuff that one might expect to be plasticine. But, to a non-casual observer, it wasn't... quite... plasticine.

It was amazing that the guards let it past, to be honest. But then again, Monty and the boys had been spending months on putting

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Friday Already?

I lost track, somewhere in the middle of the week. Nevertheless, I did manage to do all my blogly duties. And my writing quotas.

And I learned about this horseshit in which the people lobbying to quash climate change for profit are also preparing for a climate change related apocalypse by buying homes in New Zealand.

Sailing the hypocri-sea much?

Point that out to any of them and they have the power to firkin destroy your life.

I hate rich people.

They

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Challenge #02060-E236: The Way to Make Change

Humans gonna Human -- TheDragonsFlame

A mother in a war zone hands her baby up to a complete stranger, knowing that they may never meet again, but her child has a chance at something better than this. Bullets sing through the air. Fire turns the surrounding landscape into tones of amber. And the last evacuation vehicle leaves the few remaining to their fate. The mother smiles anyway, and waves 'bye-bye' to her child. Pretending, perhaps for a last handful of minutes, that

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