Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

So here's a situation:

I'd like to get my hands on some wholemeal flour. Any wholemeal will do since you can transition a sourdough starter to literally anything going as long as it's in the same family.

Obviously, if I want a rye starter, I'm going to need another jar.

However, you can use a starter with any other kind of flour you like, so long as it's got the carbohydrates for the yeast to feed on.

Beloved's corporation has realised that office space and having butts within are not strictly necessary. Like, they need the space for the servers to exist in and people to pop in now and again to make sure they're maintained, but... most stuff has been telecommutable for quite some time.

Thanks to movie companies not wanting to lose via lockdown, there's no more reasons to have a cinema release, so this might be the end of movie theatres.

Most recent news about the plague is that a lack of Vitamin D can increase your risks of suffering adverse effects from catching the plague. The good news is that half an hour in the sunshine is enough to generate that internally. So go ye forth and photosynthesise.

I haven't heard anything outrageous from the Muppet yet, and it looks like China's glorious leader is absent minus an important trace... Their media is scared to report anything beyond "everything is wonderful". Not good behaviour when the people need a smooth transition to the next glorious leader. Preferably appointed by the predecessor's posthumous endorsement.

I have been up all morning since half-past the new day, so I want to sleep, but I owe you a story.

Also I owe my podcast listeners an apology for not posting an episode on time. It's not like many people were paying attention to it anyway.

Story first. Attempting to pay attention long enough to write it before I should go shopping.

Wish me every luck. It's 7AM already.

Challenge #02670-G113: Inspired Desperation? Entertainment!

H: Did you know that you can use Duct Tape to patch your space space suit a pinch?

A: I believe you are trying to deceive me. To make me feel better about the situation you have got us into.

H: Aww. Don't be like that. It works, I promise, I've done it before.

A: That does not surprise me. -- Anon Guest

"We only have soft atmospheric livesuits. They're not rated for micrometeor impact."

"No worries," cheered Human Adam. "I've got

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Saturday Feast Day

I have had a lazy morning, not even getting out of bed before nine. Gorging myself on some remaining carbohydrates.

The news is full of false claims by the Muppet about how excellent he is, instantly followed by fact checks that say, actually no he isn't. The lack of cases in the US is directly related to the lack of testing.

So in the continuing clusterfuck, the news about the plague itself goes thus:

  • The virus can persist on surfaces for 24
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Challenge #02669-G112: The Immortal Master

Some humans fight with blades, those who live on worlds that allow it, use firearms. Or for those aboard stations and ships, crossbows. Me? I refuse to use any of that. My body is my weapon. Sure I carry a utility knife, don't most of us? But it's never been used to draw blood. With a single blow I can knock a man down, with a well-placed kick I can knock over a being the size of a tree. My hand, small

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Friday!

I don't have enough flour to be confident about making bread, but Mayhem is taking up the slack by using all my bread mix to make bread according to the instructions. He's loving it.

I like the fact that none of this bread mix is going to waste. Mayhem is making bread to be proud of, even though I can't eat it.

I've blended my harvests together this morning and made some ENORMOUS sourdough frisbees. When Chaos gets back to school, I'll

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Challenge #02668-G111: A Study in Humour

Jokes can sometimes lead into a battle of wits. While normal jokes can be represented as a straight kick or punch, puns act as the roundhouse or the hooks or uppercuts. All can be block if they known or prepare. But there’s one genre of joke many dub as “distasteful”. Dark humour, a sucker punch, illegal moves to some. It is not the jokes themselves are funny it’s is the reactions of those in the receiving end which make the

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Getting a Groove

This morning, I over-estimated my harvest and cut up twice as many olives and mushrooms as usual. Nothing was wasted, though. I added them to a quick two-egg scramble, added cheese, and called it an omelette.

Of course, miss Chaos got half of everything, but she didn't want the omelette. Meh. I thought it was tasty enough. Whatever.

I think, this Friday, I will only be making savoury pancakes. The bread flour starter is still getting healthy and I think another week

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Challenge #02667-G110: A Chosen Confusion

It is, at best, unwise to mistake these things for each other...

Kindness for Weakness

Patience for Passivity

Caution for Cowardice

Silence for Ignorance

Those who have done so have, almost invariably, learned the differences are vast indeed, and quite often have learned this in a manner whose results ensure they do not ever make that same mistake twice... or do anything else ever again, either... -- Anon Guest

It's almost a joke: A Galactic Citizen and a Deregger arrive at a

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These last few weeks have been a long year...

New Zealand, one of the countries with the strictest protocols against socialising, has effectively halted the spread. They're talking about easing off with every caution about returning to the lockdown. Australia's opening up to letting two adults at maximum go and visit friends and family, with a weather eye for outbreaks.

Meanwhile, some creative folks came up with a creepy folksong about the outbreak. In twenty years this will be "traditional" and nobody will remember that it was ever made.

To the

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Challenge #02666-G109: Perplexing Perambulation

"Necessity is the mother of invention... Boredom is the father." -- SilverRey

So many inventions happen because their inventor thinks that they are vital. Others occur because they will create a tactical advantage against an enemy. Some rare and interesting inventions happen because the creator had nothing better to do.

Case in point - weird vehicles.

People don't need a bicycle that walks on feet, nor do they need a chariot drawn by crab-like legs. They don't need a powered boat with

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Cue the Heist Music!

In order to even try and get decent flour, I have to leave the house at 7:30 in the morning.

Which means I have to at least try to rush this out.

Plus there's no telling what restrictions there may be on flour once I get there. Yes, I recognise that I'm part of the problem, but I also want to make some decent bread.

You know, like literally everyone else is doing these days.

It's raining despite the sunshine, so

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Challenge #02665-G108: Temporal Theory vs Reality

In today's episode of "Fun with Wormholes!" we will discuss how most people's family lines are actually Mobius Strips! -- SilverRey

Today in Fun With Wormholes, we explain how it's theoretically possible to be your own descendant. It all begins with one simple graph... An X-Y axis graph where one axis is time and the other is distance. On it, a line is travelling away from zero at a slight incline relative to time.

Here is our hypothetical traveller, moving at close

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A lot to unfuck

Mayhem has a job to go to. Chaos has online school to attend. I have a FUCKOFF HUGE MESS to unfuck because we all baked this weekend. I made bread, Chaos made keto-Anzac bikkies with the help of Beloved and I... and Mayhem made bread according to the instructions on the packet.

Turns out bread mix works fine when you use the yeast they include in the kit.

That bread didn't even last 24 hours. It was baked in the afternoon and

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Challenge #02664-G107: Killing Philosophy

"Ain't no kill like overkill." -- SilverRey

When there is no diplomatic recourse. When trade restrictions fail. When there are no other alternatives... they send in the humans. A small team, an individual, an army... Humans are sent in to deal with the problem.

Pinpoint accuracy is preferred, but there are other times... regrettable times, when one despot will simply be replaced with another. The revolution comes full circle with another power-hungry iron fist in charge, promoting those who agree with them,

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Baking is fun... when you can

Heist plans will be underway for early Tuesday-ish, when I shall journey out of my bubble in the earliest possible hours to lay my hands on some decent darn flour to try and get one of my starters onto proper bread flour and not a mix. I may have to go with plain flour with nothing in it if I can't find the good stuff.

I mostly failed at bread. Things have been improved by putting my doughs into bread pans for

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