InterNutter

Challenge #01458-C363: Protective Instinct

Left to my own devices, I am not very aggressive. But if you give me a small helpless person to defend I will conquer small European nations in their name. -- RecklessPrudence

There are certain things one should never, ever do in Galactic Society. You do not comment negatively about any other cogniscent's appearance. You do not engage a gravity drive in hyperspace. And you do not, under any circumstances, threaten a human's charge if that guarded body is a small, fragile life form.

All three of these examples are easily equally dangerous. The most noticeable example is Greenery Technician Pam and the Del'voq tourist named Krel.

It started, of course, with directions to the Elemeno.

Prompts remaining: 10 Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!

Challenge #01457-C362: One Exasperating Late Evening in a Recovery Room

"Do you want to explain why you caused mass hysteria and almost created a national incident?"

"You know these things happen when I'm left alone." -- OohLookShiny

"Hwell," sighed Ax'and'l. It was an old sigh. The kind of sigh that had put up with enough crap to make a rocky giant planetoid out of it. "I told you to mind the cargo..."

"And I did. I was. Honest," said Hwell. "I only stepped away t' help this wee lass--"

Ax'and'l moaned automatically.

Challenge #01456-C361: One Muddled Mid-morning in a Mystery Vessel

"Do you want to know how I can tell this is a terrible idea?"

"...how?"

"I'm being the voice of reason!" -- OohLookShiny

(Image source) (Artist)

The assembled cogniscents spared a moment to regard Ambassador Shayde. Widely regarded as the specific embodiment of human insanity. They then looked to each other as if daring someone to say, How did we get so far astray?

"As th' great Montgomery Scott said, Ye cannae change the laws o' physics," insisted Shayde. "Well. Unless ye

Post-Yule

The good news is that I didn't bounce back out of Ketosis, nor did I gain more than I've lost. I'm still in the 84-kilo zone. Just... a little higher up in there.

Our cheese-cup-cakes were an immense success. The strawberry ones were way more delicious than the original flavour. I think we're going to go Genuine Fruit Flavour each time we make these things in future.

So, of course, I have to share the recipe.

Cheesecake the Easy Way

Implements

Electric

Season's Greetings

It's Christmas Day in my household, and so far, everyone else is asleep. The fridge is overloaded with Feast Fare, including homemade chocolates, cheese-cup-cakes, a lo-carb pizza, and one of Beloved's own creations that I'm calling Salmon Bread in lieu of something better.

It's a sort of low-carb bread kind of deal, but as you can guess, it has loads of salmon in it. And it's tasty as hell. I'm encouraging Beloved to formalize the recipe so I can share it with

Challenge #01455-C360: Monster?

http://modmad.tumblr.com/post/154298352575/thelittlemonsterlover-x

Large scary demonic creature and the tiny child that keeps putting flower crowns on it. -- Anon Guest

[AN: I wish I knew what the writing in the comic said, but I shall do my best]

I am the thing that bumps in the night. I am fear incarnate. I am terror. I am the fate that waits for bad children. I am a monster in the dark. I am... Nightmare.

For untold centuries, I

Christmas eve!

We've done all our shopping (I hope!) and got all our things for the glorious morrow.

And as an extra bonus, this Yule happens on a weekend, so I don't need to worry about my novel's word count. And I really don't need to worry about an Instant, either, since it's my day off.

And I especially don't need to worry about the gap between the Instant count and the days of the year... because of all the double prompts I've been

Challenge #01454-C359: Wild Terra

The Irwin character and their adventures on Earth -- Anon Guest

[AN: once again, pre-yule shopping took me away from doing this]

"Now in most areas of human habitation, the goal is to cover as much of the body as possible. But here--" images of Surfer's Paradise, "--the rules are turned upside-down. Unless you're one of these blokes," images of surfers in their full-body surf suits. "Their vibrant colours tell the sharks that live in the water that they're not good to

Quietly dying

The good news is: LCHF isn't killing me. The bad news is that dehydration got in the way first.

Not helped by the Lurgi and the infection it brought along for the ride.

When you're doing Keto, or LCHF, one of the big problems is getting enough liquids into you. The old sugary stuff could go down quick, for sure, but as you may recall, sugars are off the menu.

I don't know why so much liquid is needed... Maybe it's because

Challenge #01453-C358: The Urban Human

An alien naturalist, performing a David Attenborough-style documentary on Earth.

Potential sequel: As above, but replace "David Attenborough" with "Steve Irwin". -- Shkspr1048

[AN: Sorry I'm so late, dear readers. Yulemas shopping spree]

"And this... is the average human population density of the planet Terra." The image showed the interior of a shopping mall on a slow hour. Humans populous enough to get in each others' way if they were determined to do so, but not enough to be in each others'

Very slightly annoyed

Following yesterday's rant about Modern Medicine and how it likes patients being sick, I got a little bit more information about how things went.

The only alternatives available in the early 70's were (a) powdered formula that was probably mostly sugars or the wrong kinds of fats, and (b) canned milk. Neither of these did me any good. And, as far as I'm aware, the knowledge about the benefits of goat's milk came by random happenstance.

One article in the Lancet can

Challenge #01452-C357: Cute and Bombproof

http://haberdashing.tumblr.com/post/154304792219/jumperjohn-you-know-that-one-post-about-humans

"You know that one post about humans being really durable compared to aliens and that one about humans being really cute to aliens?

What if they were both true at the same time. Like the aliens decide to take their human on a landing mission because they get so excited and it’s so cute but then a storm hits and they crash. And the aliens are all freaking out because they can’t be

Murderous Modern Medical Science

Yesterday, I promised you, my dear reader, that I would tell the sordid story of how modern medicine nearly snuffed my talent out in the cradle. But before I get onto that tale of intrigue, business ventures, and just plain fucking up... I have to define a few things.

"Modern Medicine", when I use it in the context of this story, is actually shorthand for "modern medicine at the time" because modern medicine is constantly in flux and capable of change. Except

Challenge #01451-C356: Nice Doggy

"Aww! Whose a cute little puppy- poo!"

"I have seen dogs. That is definitely no where near a dog,"

"Oh, leave the little cutie alone,"

"I'm serious, are you blind?" -- OohLookShiny

Gorqax sighed. "Look. I can tell you're going to be pedantic about this. A dog is a non-cogniscent deathworlder mammal of Terran origin that is quadrupedal, fur-bearing, and carnivorous."

"Yes, that is the definition." Plegg rolled hir eyes.

"This creature that I am currently grooming is also a non-cogniscent deathworlder

Ch-ch-chaaangeeeesss...

I thought I was zen about change. I thought I was cool with everything that SPG collectively decided to alter.

But then they announced that Sam Luke was leaving for his own artistic stuff, and my beloved woobie child Hatchworth was gone from the robots I adore.

So my ASD hatred of change kicked up and resulted in a stab of fear through the heart, and now I have the sads. It's not as if he's died for cryin' out loud, but

Menu

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Challenge #01458-C363: Protective Instinct

Challenge #01457-C362: One Exasperating Late Evening in a Recovery Room

Challenge #01456-C361: One Muddled Mid-morning in a Mystery Vessel

Post-Yule

Cheesecake the Easy Way

Implements

Season's Greetings

Challenge #01455-C360: Monster?

Christmas eve!

Challenge #01454-C359: Wild Terra

Quietly dying

Challenge #01453-C358: The Urban Human

Very slightly annoyed

Challenge #01452-C357: Cute and Bombproof

Murderous Modern Medical Science

Challenge #01451-C356: Nice Doggy

Ch-ch-chaaangeeeesss...