Fucking Depression

A 28-post collection

Sunday, Streaming and Enshittification

My GP in their ultimate wisdom and lack of government funding have had to charge $75 Dollarydoos per visit. Which I cannot afford on the Monday I have scheduled because payday the next day. Whee.

So when I visit, I'll clear the later payment with them and FOR SURE come visit before I go to the nearest petbarn, Food Emporium, and whatever bits-and-piecery we need for the fortnight in order to stock up on necessities.

Not necessarily in that order. I will be working from nonperishables to perishables, and carrying freezer bags in the boot for Tuesday.

Wheeeee....

Also shall be running around between bulk places before getting the stuff we can't get anywhere else at the others.

Stretching the budget to the snapping point my dearies. This is what happens when medical necessities pull at the funds in varying ways.

I have to stock up on EVERYTHING for the fam and that's going to suck wet farts out of dead donkeys.

And I also passed on the perfect retort for self-important pontificating arseholes of one degree or another: "Go choke on your own jizz." / "You know, since your so very much into autofellatio." [Autofellatio: Sucking your own privates -aka- physically impossible masturbation technique]

Everything is getting shittier and shittier and sucks and I hate it and even the upper middle-class is starting to scrape and I'm thinking about looking up an instructable for a portable fucking guillotine. Or at least an assemble-on-site guillotine.

This mood may pass if the billionaires wake up to their own bullshit and redistribute their ludicrous wealth.

Sunday, Smouldering Holiday

I got that odd pre-burnout depression mixed with Asthma Brand no-air panic attack going on, so I'm going to line up the treat food and spend the rest of the day in bed and watching garbage.

I have all the post-medication signs that I should have done a nebuliser dose sooner. Including:

Pins and needles in the extremities
Tinnitus
Dizzy spells that are more like the entire grimoire
General wibbly wobblyness that means I should probably steady myself on stable objects for

Sunday, Feeling Hollow

Went to a Queer Social and didn't know how to contribute to the conversations. The person we were meeting after said social cancelled. Went looking for something fun to do and ended up nope-ing back home. Woke up to catch Tale Foundry and it's been moved to tomorrow.

Feeling a little unloved in my particular pocket of the world.

Still, I have plenty of time to write my blog, work on a chamber or two of the dungeon, plot or write something

Tuesday, Patreon, and a Problem

It's Patreon Tuesday, so I have a bunch of stuff to post. I don't have anything for Tale Foundry - YET. Thinking about this is one of my tasks today.

I aim to get a month's worth of fictions tagged because I keep forgetting to do a week a day. Bleh.

So much to do. So little organisation. On my gottado's today:

All the self cares
Patreon posts
Tale Foundry story
Dungeon building
World building
Fic tagging for the app

If I

Sunday and Shenanigans

Tale Foundry is doing its stream as I type. I spent most of my morning alternately watching Toasty doing amazing things with lines and blobs, and writing even more Koshdelia for funzies.

Descents into madness are delicious.

I have watched three more episodes of Legend of Vox Machina but I haven't spotted where they hid Matt Mercer this time. I shall have to find him. That little task will help me maintain consciousness until 4PM, when I must sleep before D&

Saturday, Day 0, Surrender?

The government is not making people check in any more. They don't use the app, they don't use the app data, and so many people just sail on by without checking in, it's criminal.

I keep feeling like everyone in charge is just sticking their heads in the sand about this damn plague and hoping it goes away. Nevermind the thousands who die of it. Nevermind the thousands who are incapacitated by it. As long as the money flows, all is well.

Sunday, Day 0, PLNs and Plots

I'm still not looking at the statistics or the news. I just can't stand it any more. There's a reason why I stayed away from the news before the firkin plague hit.

Too many people making truly daft decisions for the lure of money rather than the greater good. Or because it's what they think their holy book tells them to. Or because cruelty's just in their DNA.

Too many people choosing to be nasty instead of figuring out where two kind

Wednesday - Day Zero - Mor Shenanigans

THREE new cases from overseas and the odds of One Arsehole are increasing. It also means that there are more and more people with the plague attempting to reach areas without. That is, as I have previously stated, how you spread the plague.

One arsehole can shit on everything for everyone.

Election is happening in the USA and no matter who wins, the right wing will be firing upon the left wing. The only real difference is whether the ones with guns

Sunday - Day Zero

All three cases found yesterday are foreign imports and already in quarantine, but it still resets my counter to zero and it still makes me stay largely at home doing buggerall with myself. Sigh.

Living with a chronic lung condition is firkin hell during times of an air-transmissable plague.

And it's sad that I just wrote that as if these were multiple occurrences. The truth is, we are just over the first wave. The second will happen when we believe we're safe

Day One Once More

No new cases today and some rumblings that yesterday's new case may be a false positive. I refuse to take chances and count the false positives as positives anywhere.

Today's agenda includes household unfuckening and no bread. We still have an entire loaf that the family is disinterested in. I shall leave the baking of bread alone for another week. The family tends to tire of a homemade loaf now and again.

Shit happens.

Speaking of immense piles of shit:

Calls arise

The Wheezing Continueth

My experimentation yesterday has revealed results. In that I can keep this compy functioning if I stick to the BARE MINIMUM of programs going at once. Mail, Markdown editor, and browser with only the necessary pages loaded. Nothing else.

Even then, it's slow as balls to get anything done, so... Yeah. I need to save up AU$1.5K so I can afford to get a new one and do all the things I dearly want to do. I already have the

Some Good News PLS?

My favourite band in the whole wide world fired two members for bad behaviour. I'll drop the phrase "sexual misconduct" and leave the entire issue there. Ironically, the former member most vilified for such is also the most apologetic. The other one continues with the denial.

Sigh.

The band will continue, hopefully with better people in charge of certain areas.

Queensland is accepting somewhere in the region of 4K people (with permits) and anyone with Victoria number-plates is going to get some

Counting up to fourteen. Again.

No new cases in Queensland again. Day one of fourteen.

I think I'm going to stay away from a majority of the Plague News because its effect is debilitating on my psyche. On the other hand, I am getting loads of sleep. It's just not good sleep because depression naps are not refreshing.

Going through the day exhausted is not good for mind, body, or soul.

Things that have reached past my filters so far:

Bloke in Victoria attempted to get into

I gotta but I don't wanna

I remember going through this during the 2012 floods. Frozen with fear and watching the news circle around. Just sitting and watching the devastation while I was holed up and listening to the ceaseless sound of rain. I couldn't move and I couldn't do anything else but stay informed.

I'm reaching a point where I don't want to leave the bed. I went to bed in the afternoon when I was done with my Instant and I spent the rest of the

Tuesday. I can't.

I didn't want to get out of bed, today. The world is falling apart. According to the vilest lies, Statistics, 87% of the USA are in favour of sensible quarantine procedures, including masks, social distancing, and staying home as much as humanly possible. Alas, the remaining 11% are the ones fucking things up for everyone else.

Speaking of the 11%... there's a bunch of them in dense public housing who are locked in for quarantine. They don't want tests for reasons that