Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #01358-C263: Mundanity

The "Do Something!" set of questions used by Mothers everywhere, usually beginning with "Have you?" or "Are you". -- Knitnan

The wake-up call had been put together by someone who had heard of roosters and decided to improve by adding louder elements. Cal got out of hir bed-nook before the automatic discomfort protocol could start running low currents through hir body.

Ze barely got time to yawn and stretch before the automated staff management program, inevitably nicknamed 'mother' and variants thereof, kicked into gear.

"Have you gone to the toilet?"

"Gimmie time to stretch, Mom..." Cal finished cracking hir joints and stumbled to the tiny chamber that would whisk away Cal's biological waste and disassemble it into its most valuable and stable compounds. From there, it was a short trip to the neighbouring cleansing booth.

"Ah-ah! Flush."

Cal grumbled and leaned back to press the button. Automated systems had been attempted, long ago, but there were obvious flaws.

"Have you washed your hands?"

"I'm washing my entire self, Mom." Cal had learned to be thorough and efficient. The hot water turned off in five minutes. The automated body scrubbers activated in three. And 'Mom' would lock the tube if it thought that Cal had not been thorough, activating the scrubbers anyway.

"Did you brush your teeth?" greeted Cal, regardless, as ze exited.

Sigh. "Yes Mom..." Cal slid into a fresh, clean set of Ship's Skins. Emblazoned with the hated company logo.

The regulated breakfast was low-bit Nutri-food. Paste in a tube and a separate allotment of water. Cal devoured it without any sign of enjoyment. It was all the company would give hir, it was all ze would take.

"Remember to dispose of the empties."

Sigh. "Yes Mom."

Cal read the ship status. Element tanks at a collective 85%. Still. They needed to find more stuff. Too bad that the ship was currently in a vacant spot and incapable of any interesting speeds when 100% tanks were not in existence.

So, in essence, the ship had woken hir up with nothing to do. Another fine day in Supplied Demand.

"Have you done your exercise regime?"

"I'm about to, Mom." Cal forced hirself into the running shoes and jogged to music along the paths between the tanks. In hir youth, ze would have noted which ones needed the most stuff. But that was something that didn't improve any kind of performance numbers.

How much of this cargo was hir own output? Ze'd heard of gatherers spending years on the Out Path, and coming back with a literal load of their own crap. It put new meaning to the phrase, 'a shitty tour'. Supply drones didn't care how long anyone had been out. And the company only cared about that which came in.

After running, came weights. Cal swore that 'Mom' was a secret sadist, pushing hir to do 'just one more' until every muscle was jelly.

Cal knew that ze was just an adaptive repair unit in a bigger set of automated machines designed to ensure that Supplied Demand got all the useful elements that it could eat. Today just... enforced that. Dance to the music, little monkey. And if you're needed to do a job, we'll let you have some candy.

Of course, Supplied Demand was legally obligated to make certain that Cal was in peak physical shape. Adequate nutrition. Adequate comfort. Adequate companionship. Adequate...

Not exemplary. Not excellent. Not descriptive at all, but... adequate.

Personally, Cal could not wait until Furlough, when ze would hit the nearest arboretum and just... exist... somewhere other than these grey and adequate walls.

It would be nice if the company allowed Cal a hobby. Something to do that did not involve checking and maintaining and keeping an eye on the fill level. At least they couldn't stop hir from singing.

"So hoist up the John B sai-ils. See how the main sail sets. Call for the Captain ashore, I wanna go home..."

(Muse food remaining: 13. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

To the dumps!

Fret not, dear readers, I am emotionally fine. What's happening today is that I am hauling a veritable mountain of accumulated detritus out to the local dump.

I will be counting car-loads. My nifty little TARDIS car does have a carrying capacity, despite all my insistence that its volume is infinite. AND I will be doing this after my writing is done.

I'm still in the process of evicting extraneous plates and cups. I've yet to get around to evicting extraneous glass,

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Challenge #01357-C262: Strange Encounters

"Why is there a man convulsing in the halls?"

"Don't worry, the king's men will see to him."

"That's... not what I asked," -- OohLookShiny

The new Ambassador for T'kerrrita was taking the Tour. Since it was between Ambassadorial Meets, the Tour was meant to acclimate them to the most amount of civilisations in the least amount of time. And, naturally, one of the stops was Amalgam Station, which always had a solid volume of Ambassadors at any given time.

Unfortunately... one

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Embuggerances

I can't do half of the stuff I need to do, at least before noon-ish, because this harness necessitates staying away from large amounts of water, transmitting equipment, microwaves, or my induction cooktop.

Further bad news - even though my Scooba floor-mopping robot has been restored to the point where it can take a charge, it won't go anywhere or clean any floors because it keeps thinking that it's clean water tank is empty. Also, it doesn't seem to be able to

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Challenge #01356-C261: You Need More Tests

Diagnostician in a world similar to our own, but with one major difference. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: I'm pretty sure I did one of this prompt for Undertale once upon a time... Gotta shake things up this time.]

Headline news had once been Magic Is Real!. But that was a long time ago. Cryptids, monsters, and assorted paradimensional beings came out of the woodwork. And humanity did what it did best - it bred with them. Which lead to some... interesting medical revelations.

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Here I actually go...

Friendo had an emergency to get back to, so now I'm unfucking on my own. And sending my friendo documentary pix of the progress that I'm (very) slowly making.

It's raining, so all the laundry has to go through the dryer, and Beloved doesn't want to work or go walking because gutsache because meds. But I am doing good! I am making progress.

I put another load of dishwashing in and, whilst I was at it, unfucked the crockery cupboard by evicting

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Challenge #01355-C260: Communication Issues.

Followup to Challenge #01326-C231, here: 'It’s not even consistent; it varies wildly by geographical region, ancestry and personal history of the individual, which, like, how is a poor anthropologist meant to know that sort of detail? How do humans divine this sort of thing upon meeting new members of their species? Do they have some sort of associative telepathy? No? Argh!'
(source) -- RecklessPrudence

The planet known as Beach had met the Galactic Alliance, which meant that they had a

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Ow, and more ow to come

Yesterday was a marathon. It involved cleaning the kids' morass of mess up so that their rooms would once again be live-able.

My back hurt so bad that it was hard to get to sleep. Or stay asleep

And now I have more of the same with an embuggerance in the middle. Because the nice ppl at QML managed to double-book my harness appointment and it's either travel to Tullagawoopwoop for one they have elsewhere, or get another appointment to see IF

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Challenge #01354-C259: One Cheesy Dragon

This post, which lead to this art. Fic away! -- RecklessPrudence

Tara McCreedy looked down at the living sample. It stretched all six of its limbs and allowed its peculiar wings to flutter. "Okay," she allowed. "I can see what it is, I just want to know why."

"Er. This is more of a sketch," the lead scientist of this lab wouldn't meet anyone's eyes. "See, I thought it might be cool to have dragon cheese from real dragons, um... so I

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Commence the Unfuckening!

I'm in for some Interesting Times, this week. Friendo is coming to unriddle the ungodly mess that my home has become and maybe come up with some solutions for a more permanent state of unfucked.

I suspect a majority of the floor debris will be dealt with in one day. Making a useful system will take longer.

And in the middle of all this, I also have to budget time to do my Instant and my book contribution. Because I can't make

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Challenge #01353-C258: Baffling Footage

Imagine this being the only news clip in existence for this time period (like the comment says) after Shayde pops up, and people asking her about it. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: Amalgam happens 500 years in our future, but I can deal]

Shayde didn't expect a ceremony. Usually what passed as her work was catching up with news and events she had missed[1], gathering favourites, and occasionally explaining things to a small audience of concerned Archivaas.

Today... the entire theatre was booked

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Once again...

The little darlings are safely in scenic Coominya whilst my friendo comes up to unfuck the entire house for three days.

Not the week I was hoping for, but an improvement on the base state of zero friends and zero days.

Sure, I would have got back to achievable cleanliness eventually, but eventually is a slow boat to frustration and woe.

And speaking of frustration and woe... Beloved and I are off to MeMum's to unfuck her compy and make sure it's

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Challenge #01352-C257: Lilo and Stitch Go To College

Since there's no chance of this ever becoming an actual TV series, I'd like a fic, please. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: Ask, and you shall receive. Eventually]

Things were... okay. Sure, having a bigger family helped in certain areas. There were more hands to pay for everything, but there were also more mouths to feed. They struggled, here and there, but in the end, it was... okay. They managed.

And then it was time for Lilo to go to college. She applied for

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Hello, Inertia. Can I kick your arse?

Yesterday, my Beloved begged off of the daily walk because of a light rain. I could understand because they have cloth-sided walking shoes. Even the best of athletic shoes are water permeable and not proof against the slings and arrows of early morning dew.

Or a good, soaking rain.

It's why I wear my boots when the ground is moist.

Today, however, Beloved's diabetes pills are kicking their arse and they're not feeling so very well at all, this morning.

At first,

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Challenge #01351-C256: You Try to Teach Them...

Corvids. Just... Corvids. (link)

(btw did you know all modern corvids are descended from Aussie ancestors? Well, technically Australasian ones, but close enough) -- RecklessPrudence

Ravens are widely recognised as one of the more intelligent birds on the planet Earth. Substantial evidence for this includes the fact that they have learned how to tame humans.

Humans tend to object to that minor fact. They will go on endlessly about how they were the ones to teach corvids how to communicate in their

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