Amalgam Universe

A 2309-post collection

Challenge #02669-G112: The Immortal Master

Some humans fight with blades, those who live on worlds that allow it, use firearms. Or for those aboard stations and ships, crossbows. Me? I refuse to use any of that. My body is my weapon. Sure I carry a utility knife, don't most of us? But it's never been used to draw blood. With a single blow I can knock a man down, with a well-placed kick I can knock over a being the size of a tree. My hand, small as it is, can strike a seemingly random spot, and in moments my enemy seizes up and then dies.

My body is my weapon, trained by an art that was many centuries old. It was taught for defense, it was taught for meditation, it was taught, to all things, peaceful monks in temples. Martial arts, kung-fu, tae-kwon-do, judo, tai-chi, ninjitsu, jujitsu, hapkido, aikido, capoeira, sambo, dim mak, kendo, and so many others. I've learned them all.

My body, a deadly weapon of war, meant to protect the peaceful. None shall harm those under my care. I won't let you die, not on my watch. -- Anon Guest

Deathworlders come up with so many methods of offensive defence. Their weapons are many and varied, but the most interesting things happen when various administrative forces attempt to ban a rebellion-minded proletariat from rebalancing the scales of justice. Banning weapons never really works. Banning certain types of weapons just leads to the peasantry inventing new kinds of weapons out of ordinary household objects.

When fighting with any kind of weapon is banned, the Deathworlders simply invent methods of incapacitating others bare-handed, bare-footed, and sometimes naked. Many an army has faced a throng of Humans wearing only paint and a grimace1, and that alone has caused them to turn around and think about their life choices.

Then there's martial arts. Training mind and body to be beyond normal Deathworlder limitations and exceed what should be possible with a Deathworlder body. This sort of thing generally takes years and one Human trained in one discipline is a being to be feared. The limit used to be one Human lifetime, but Humans have a way of cheating.

Support me on Patreon / Buy me a Ko-fi

Continue Reading

Prompts remaining: 86 Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!

Challenge #02668-G111: A Study in Humour

Jokes can sometimes lead into a battle of wits. While normal jokes can be represented as a straight kick or punch, puns act as the roundhouse or the hooks or uppercuts. All can be block if they known or prepare. But there’s one genre of joke many dub as “distasteful”. Dark humour, a sucker punch, illegal moves to some. It is not the jokes themselves are funny it’s is the reactions of those in the receiving end which make the

Read more »

Challenge #02667-G110: A Chosen Confusion

It is, at best, unwise to mistake these things for each other...

Kindness for Weakness

Patience for Passivity

Caution for Cowardice

Silence for Ignorance

Those who have done so have, almost invariably, learned the differences are vast indeed, and quite often have learned this in a manner whose results ensure they do not ever make that same mistake twice... or do anything else ever again, either... -- Anon Guest

It's almost a joke: A Galactic Citizen and a Deregger arrive at a

Read more »

Challenge #02666-G109: Perplexing Perambulation

"Necessity is the mother of invention... Boredom is the father." -- SilverRey

So many inventions happen because their inventor thinks that they are vital. Others occur because they will create a tactical advantage against an enemy. Some rare and interesting inventions happen because the creator had nothing better to do.

Case in point - weird vehicles.

People don't need a bicycle that walks on feet, nor do they need a chariot drawn by crab-like legs. They don't need a powered boat with

Read more »

Challenge #02665-G108: Temporal Theory vs Reality

In today's episode of "Fun with Wormholes!" we will discuss how most people's family lines are actually Mobius Strips! -- SilverRey

Today in Fun With Wormholes, we explain how it's theoretically possible to be your own descendant. It all begins with one simple graph... An X-Y axis graph where one axis is time and the other is distance. On it, a line is travelling away from zero at a slight incline relative to time.

Here is our hypothetical traveller, moving at close

Read more »

Challenge #02664-G107: Killing Philosophy

"Ain't no kill like overkill." -- SilverRey

When there is no diplomatic recourse. When trade restrictions fail. When there are no other alternatives... they send in the humans. A small team, an individual, an army... Humans are sent in to deal with the problem.

Pinpoint accuracy is preferred, but there are other times... regrettable times, when one despot will simply be replaced with another. The revolution comes full circle with another power-hungry iron fist in charge, promoting those who agree with them,

Read more »

Challenge #02663-G106: All Signs Point to...

"OK. This place is disgusting. I don't think there is enough bleach on the planet to make it safe..."

"I found this stuff! It was in the cleaning section, and while I can't read anything on it it has a 5 page booklet of what I think are warnings... At least all the skull and crossbones and hazard signs look like warnings."

"Grab three. Anything with that many warnings has to be good." -- SilverRey

There are reasons why some hulks are

Read more »

Challenge #02662-G105: Bring Your Own Roadblock

"Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far." - Roosevelt -- SilverRey

Welcome to Pantibole Prime. Mind how you go. Picture, if you will, a planet divided. For centuries, the Ventith and the Tigraas have been, if not at war, then at minimum intense rivalry since their history began. It has always been aquas against magentas. Either in bloody war, guerilla conflict, or beating the pants off the opposing side in sportsball... there has always been a rivalry between

Read more »

Challenge #02661-G104: Sorry to Cause a Fuss

Human to Alien: Could you please have the head of engineering come here? Don't worry, nothing is wrong. I just... saw a way to improve this! I am holding it so I don't lose track on the spot I want to talk to them about. Please hurry... I don't want to "forget" what I want to tell them.

Human to Engineer: So... Please keep this quiet. I don't want to cause a panic and make this worse... But, if I let go

Read more »

Challenge #02660-G103: Minimising All Possible Harm

"Don't fix what's not broken."

"If it's not broken, you haven't tested it enough." -- SilverRey

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
If it isn't broken, test it some more. -- Conflicting Human Axioms.

Some things need fixing before they break. Emergency services anticipate even the ridiculous emergencies so that they can be ready before they happen. This has lead to the 'zombie plague' and 'black hole' plans in the emergency systems all over Alliance space.

Zombie Plague has been on

Read more »

Challenge #02659-G102: Alexandria in Amber

A pre-shattering time capsule is found on Earth. In 2019, the time capsule was put into a cavern that was deliberately collapsed back in that prehistory era only to be opened, slowly, by centuries of erosion and earth shifts. Several teachers and historians carefully gathered text books, history books from around the world, old newspapers, maps, copied old scrolls, various sets of encyclopedias, bibles from as many cultures as possible, books on languages from around the world, to name but a few

Read more »

Challenge #02658-G101: Doing All They Can

The escape pod came down hard. The small crew of havenworlders, and the one human, now on an unfamiliar planet. The planet, itself, was more or less safe enough except for one tiny thing. The same explosion that had crippled the ship, caused by odd electrical storms the planet periodically suffered sending lightning sprites into the air, also had caused flash-burns across the human's face, they couldn't see. The medic cleaned the injury and wrapped bandage around the human's face, but the

Read more »

Challenge #02656-G099: Holding On

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gCQyKJr6pJA Aliens often forget the Power we can have, when we WANT to Hang on to something. -- Anon Guest

[AN: Holy shit, that's terrifying. Offensensitivity warning for fear of heights and physical injury]

"There's only enough capacity in the lifeboat for seven. How do you plan on coming with us?"

The Ships' Human, having fought to the last enemy, just grinned. "Outside," said Human Karth. "I can hang on for long enough. Don't worry about

Read more »

Challenge #02654-G097: A Surpassed Reminder

When we drink, we get drunk.

When we get drunk, we fall asleep.

When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.

When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.

So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven! -- Anon Guest

This was a decorative plaque found in the ruins. Unremarkable, save for the fact that most of it was legible, and didn't necessitate reconstruction. There were thousands like it. Almost one in every ruined home. Just like the ones with

Read more »

Challenge #02653-G096: Blandishments for the Bland

Anything else with CLARC?

(Sorry about the blast from the past. Slowly getting fully caught up.) -- SilverRey

[AN: Nothing to apologise for. I love that you love the old stuff enough to deliver some inspiration. Hopefully you're reading faster than a story a day ;) ]

Every fleet has its screw-ups, every force has its dead weight. They may also serve who stand and wait, but those who sit on their butts with a finger up an orifice are not doing anyone any

Read more »