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Amalgam Universe

A 2271-post collection

Challenge #02677-G120: A Mind of Their Own

The war rages, bodies fell left and right, were they man or monster? They do not know, for the the line that separated them blurred centuries ago. -- Anon Guest

Someone, somewhere, is re-inventing the Enlisted Man again. When will they learn, huh? -- Elsyn Flaard comedy routine.

Some creatures, the unethical gengineers argue, are made for battle. With the right tweaks, they could become the most formidable fighting force in Alliance space. Then, they could make the majority decisions, and on and on and on...

It never really works. Let's look at the most recent reason why. It always occurs in a secret lab, because if the CRC got wind of it before it happened, they'd shut that nonsense down before the final flourish on the last signature became committed to the business plan. There are always military-minded souls who honestly believe that might makes right and right makes the rules. They, and the wealthy who believe this might be a good idea, are the driving force.

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Challenge #02676-G119: Hot, Brown, and Horrifying

There are many unspoken laws across the galaxy. Don’t provoke a calm man. Fear the wrath of a protective mother. Don’t take any of Human Girth's drinks. Ok maybe not that the last one but it only applies to one ship. -- Anon Guest

Welcome aboard the Poke And Run, do not accept beverages from the Ship's Human. You do not want to know why. Even though we know you'll say you do. The usual rules of space travel apply:

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Challenge #02675-G118: The Bad Old Ways

A human got tired of the crew saying that humans are insane, so they decide to show their crew what true human insanity looks like by taking them on a field trip to the nearby insane asylum. (Bonus points if Said asylum happens to be Arkham Asylum.) -- Cheshire

[AN: Punishing the mentally disabled for being mentally disabled is not the best way to deal with that sort of thing. Besides, insanity is a matter of perspective, as I keep stating in

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Challenge #02674-G117: Planet Pet-it

Whole planets dedicated to humans need to touch things. They range from your typical cat cafe walking with elephants, to even swimming with sharks. And that's just the animals from earth! Each plant has a different variety of species to accommodate any human, Making them a great alternative for humans who keep touching the unknown animals on equally unknown planets. -- Anon Guest

Humans look with their hands. This is a known, if confusing fact. Humans have reasonably reliable senses that use

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Challenge #02673-G116: A Calm and Hostile Takeover

She was an avid inventor, had been ever since she was a small child. She had been born on a world controlled by DeReggers but her family had moved away from that place and into Galactic Alliance space finally settling on a haven world that allowed for havenworlders and deathworlders to live together. When she was 9, she'd found a way to improve upon the translators that allowed for better communication with other species. When she was 13, she'd graduated from school

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Challenge #02672-G115: Back From the Deepest Well

It had been years since ze had been seen last, though not nearly as long as had been estimated, wagered or theorised. When a derelict, cobbled together ship limped into The Blackstump research station. it had seemed to come from come from beyond what was known and explored space, and from the entirely the wrong direction from which the occupant was last seen.

The Return of Andi the Undying

https://steemit.com/fiction/@internutter/challenge-02156-e327-they-ll-be-back -- Adam in Darwin

The ship was

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Challenge #02670-G113: Inspired Desperation? Entertainment!

H: Did you know that you can use Duct Tape to patch your space space suit a pinch?

A: I believe you are trying to deceive me. To make me feel better about the situation you have got us into.

H: Aww. Don't be like that. It works, I promise, I've done it before.

A: That does not surprise me. -- Anon Guest

"We only have soft atmospheric livesuits. They're not rated for micrometeor impact."

"No worries," cheered Human Adam. "I've got

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Challenge #02669-G112: The Immortal Master

Some humans fight with blades, those who live on worlds that allow it, use firearms. Or for those aboard stations and ships, crossbows. Me? I refuse to use any of that. My body is my weapon. Sure I carry a utility knife, don't most of us? But it's never been used to draw blood. With a single blow I can knock a man down, with a well-placed kick I can knock over a being the size of a tree. My hand, small

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Challenge #02668-G111: A Study in Humour

Jokes can sometimes lead into a battle of wits. While normal jokes can be represented as a straight kick or punch, puns act as the roundhouse or the hooks or uppercuts. All can be block if they known or prepare. But there’s one genre of joke many dub as “distasteful”. Dark humour, a sucker punch, illegal moves to some. It is not the jokes themselves are funny it’s is the reactions of those in the receiving end which make the

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Challenge #02667-G110: A Chosen Confusion

It is, at best, unwise to mistake these things for each other...

Kindness for Weakness

Patience for Passivity

Caution for Cowardice

Silence for Ignorance

Those who have done so have, almost invariably, learned the differences are vast indeed, and quite often have learned this in a manner whose results ensure they do not ever make that same mistake twice... or do anything else ever again, either... -- Anon Guest

It's almost a joke: A Galactic Citizen and a Deregger arrive at a

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Challenge #02666-G109: Perplexing Perambulation

"Necessity is the mother of invention... Boredom is the father." -- SilverRey

So many inventions happen because their inventor thinks that they are vital. Others occur because they will create a tactical advantage against an enemy. Some rare and interesting inventions happen because the creator had nothing better to do.

Case in point - weird vehicles.

People don't need a bicycle that walks on feet, nor do they need a chariot drawn by crab-like legs. They don't need a powered boat with

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Challenge #02665-G108: Temporal Theory vs Reality

In today's episode of "Fun with Wormholes!" we will discuss how most people's family lines are actually Mobius Strips! -- SilverRey

Today in Fun With Wormholes, we explain how it's theoretically possible to be your own descendant. It all begins with one simple graph... An X-Y axis graph where one axis is time and the other is distance. On it, a line is travelling away from zero at a slight incline relative to time.

Here is our hypothetical traveller, moving at close

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Challenge #02664-G107: Killing Philosophy

"Ain't no kill like overkill." -- SilverRey

When there is no diplomatic recourse. When trade restrictions fail. When there are no other alternatives... they send in the humans. A small team, an individual, an army... Humans are sent in to deal with the problem.

Pinpoint accuracy is preferred, but there are other times... regrettable times, when one despot will simply be replaced with another. The revolution comes full circle with another power-hungry iron fist in charge, promoting those who agree with them,

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Challenge #02663-G106: All Signs Point to...

"OK. This place is disgusting. I don't think there is enough bleach on the planet to make it safe..."

"I found this stuff! It was in the cleaning section, and while I can't read anything on it it has a 5 page booklet of what I think are warnings... At least all the skull and crossbones and hazard signs look like warnings."

"Grab three. Anything with that many warnings has to be good." -- SilverRey

There are reasons why some hulks are

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Challenge #02662-G105: Bring Your Own Roadblock

"Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far." - Roosevelt -- SilverRey

Welcome to Pantibole Prime. Mind how you go. Picture, if you will, a planet divided. For centuries, the Ventith and the Tigraas have been, if not at war, then at minimum intense rivalry since their history began. It has always been aquas against magentas. Either in bloody war, guerilla conflict, or beating the pants off the opposing side in sportsball... there has always been a rivalry between

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