real life

A 3821-post collection

What. The Actual. Fuck!

Just when you thought it was safe to re-enter the world (with adequate protection and social distancing)... Just when the good news of the flattening curve or a light at the end of the crisis tunnel is starting to dawn...

The fuckshit blooms like a god-damned FUNGUS.

For once, this is not an action by the Muppet, but an alleged doctor who recommends breathing in nebulised hydrogen peroxide to treat "viral respiratory illnesses". [ Source ]. Sure. Breathe in aerosolized motherfucking BLEACH to rid yourself of disease.

It's more likely to melt your lungs from the inside than actually do anything against covid. In brief: Do not do this, you will die.

In other news, the Britons are getting their covid advice from a roasted tuber:

I showed it to Beloved and they watched it twice to make certain they had just seen what they had just seen. It's real. It exists. I find it personally hilarious and I am both boggled and croggled as to exactly WHY they chose a baked potato to be the mascot for this thing.

Whatever.

Profiteers abound. Scammers trying to trick folks out of their money by pretending to be WHO representatives. People selling supplies they over-purchased at a fantastic mark-up to those desperate and without. There's some folks selling homemade masks on their Etsy accounts, but that's WAY different to selling a bog roll to the highest bidder.

How to tell the difference: Remember what a thing generally costs and, if that price is WAY higher than it should be, move the heck away from the salesplace.

It costs to make masks by hand, so maybe practice making one according to instructions and then figure out how much you're willing to pay someone else to do that for you and possibly better than you did it. There you go. You have an acceptable price range.

The good news is that Australia's curve might be flattening out. If we keep the protocols up until the virus finally peters out, then proper sanity could return. I, for one, can't wait to actually find flour on the shelves again.

Speaking of sanity, my creativity is slowly edging back. I've been able to write entire section in a fanfic of mine without fighting anything onto the page. Huzzah.

Ah well. Onwards with today's tale.

Good Friday

I have learned that the absolute worst time to go shopping for Erastide Chocolate is the day before Good Friday. The shops are not restocking that BS.

I didn't get anyone outside the home any chocolate. I hope the surrounding family forgives me, but I had limited time and I had to see to my family first.

My masks' filter is only good for an hour and a half, so my Plague-specific protection routine goes:

  1. Start timer that's set for 1 hour
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Nope, the world is still crabonkers

I checked the news this morning and... a shopper attempted to gouge out a shop staffperson's eyes for not letting them in. There are occupancy limits EVERYWHERE. Folks need to learn how to chill.

I also need to do some shopping before everything closes for Erastide. Chocolate for the family, cord for the masks we're making, coffee for my own sanity, and any little Erastide treats I can actually find after I unfuck my house.

I have actually started things in motion

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Winding Down?

Optimists are saying we might be free of lockdown procedures as early as May.

When the dust finally clears, epidemiologists will be comparing the Covid-19 spread in the USA versus how it hit in South Korea. Both countries got the virus on the very same day, but both nations had very different policies with how to deal with it.

S. Korea locked down instantly, put all possible effort into manufacturing PPE and making certain there were enough medical facilities to go around.

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Deep breaths...

Mayhem has the sniffles and a cough. He's pretty sure it's not the Plague, but he's staying home anyway. Best to keep one's virii to oneself.

If I want to make more masks, I'm going to need more cord. Mayhem's going to need his if the seasonal sniffles continues to persist.

For my mental health, today, I am not getting involved in any Covid news. I'm at my capacity. I can't look at the latest piles of idiocy without breaking my heart.

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Really Late Start

I'm still alive, dear readers. Not yet fucked, or so I hope. Beloved and I have been making sneezeguard masks so that we don't accidentally spread anything to anyone else.

If you cough or sneeze, and go outside, you should wear one of these - it's just good manners.

A step-by-step version with our adjustments will be up on my foodie blog in due course. But we need to go out and get cordage for the ear pieces. I have enough for

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Further and further into the weeds...

Officials are telling us to act as if we're already sick. The USA is ordering body bags instead of ventilators. Of course the idiots in charge over there are proposing "biggest disaster first" spot-treating the outbreaks.

There's increasing evidence that wearing masks will curb the spread if everyone wears a mask when they go out and they use all the other social distancing protocols.

People who are looking after the sick are dying. Elon Musk bought a bunch of CPAP machines and

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I might be fucked, IDK

My headache got so excruciating during yesterday that I took the ibuprofen-paracetamol combo and now I'm SUPER paranoid about whether or not I or anyone in the family could be infected.

Worse news - the cyclone headache is edging back into my awareness.

If I hold out for as long as possible and keep my distance from everyone in the world and be paranoid about avoiding outside contact, I might be able to avoid the Plague. I hope. I pray.

I really

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Ow... Ow... Ow... Ffffuuuuu...

I have a cyclone headache, and I can't use ibuprofen to defeat it because use of that increases my risk of catching The Plague.

Paracetamol does nothing, alas. I need the combo of paracetamol and ibuprofen to kill this cyclone headache of mine. Boo.

The sun's come up, and my alarm's gone off, so I need to feed the cats, feed my sourdough starters, and clean out the litterbox in the catio.

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Fun was had

...video should be edited, but right now I feel about as creative as a shred of cardboard. I can write maybe one or two sentences in anything I want to write.

I want to experience something new, but I don't want to start on anything. It's like I'm circling some kind of drain and I don't know how to get myself out of it.

Got any suggestions for sweet-happy cheer-up material that's minimal effort? I kind'a need it.

They're cracking down on

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Ooh, it's all so nice in the nuthouse...

Misinformation is spreading from the highest sections, with people in the admin section of the USA recommending dangerous shit like medication that hasn't been properly tested, or sticking a blow-dryer up your nose. We need experts on the screen telling folks the proper things to do.

The Muppet says that everyone should get back to work by April 12, whilst the actual medics say he's pulled that date out of his arse. In Australia, we have people with red circles on their

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Day Nine: Severe Measures

There's still idiots flaunting the law and one bloke who repeatedly escaped restrictions and got jailed for it. People are living alone in hotel rooms and public figures are wearing little green squares on their clothing... possibly to show that they've tested clean for Covid. It might be a new variant of the support ribbon, I don't know. All I know for sure is that it looks like a sticker.

Officials are urging younger folks to take the isolation protocols seriously because

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Technically Day Eight

We've completed a week of isolation out of the initial fortnight they expect us to stay away from everyone in order to flatten the curve. As one of the "at risk" folk, I'm staying the hell away from any kind of public place until all the news of corona dies down or a vaccine is invented, whichever comes first.

The Muppet is expecting people to be nice to him in order to gain support for the crisis. Translation: he's not doing his

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Early Start

I began my day at half-past midnight in expectation of a stream... but Toasty isn't in the right mindset to Art, today. That's cool, though, because I finally got my keister in gear and caught up with the buffer for Inter-Mission. The downside now is that I have to find a rough half-hour in which everyone else is asleep so I can record more stories for more buffer.

Which is going to be fun because the entire house is now on Who

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Bread Day part 2

Wholemeal flour rises REAL slow, so I give it the maximum possible time to do stuff. I'm worried that the dough is really dry.

Probably the third iteration of bread will be much better because I won't spill water on my surface and I'll know about a proper surface to flour and all that nonsense.

This lot will be better than the last lot. The next lot will be better than this lot. That's what progress is.

Speaking of progress, my breads

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