Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #01125-C028: Angels in the Alley

http://gothiethefairy.tumblr.com/post/138121665438/ravi-o-li-atomicshitpost-punnyskeleton

!!!!! -- Gallifreya

Don't go to the Underground. Bad things happen to you if you go there. Especially if you are the bad thing. It's where the mobster monsters rule the grimy streets.

It's said that they eat human children.

Five had gone into the tunnel to Monster Mountain. None had been found again.

Frisk had run because there was nowhere left to run to. Even the worst of the bullies would not follow. The Underground was a truly terrifying place. Parts of it were freezing. Parts were underwater. Parts were so hot that there were lava flows. And the monsters who lived there liked it that way.

But for Frisk, it was not nearly as terrifying as their foster home.

Starving and cold and frightened, they found an alley, and a place to hide. Behind a trash can (with the rest of the garbage, the bullies would say) under an abandoned shipping pallet. Where Frisk found out that there were other humans who spent time in the Underground. But they belonged there, because they were monsters, too.

The lady didn't last long. The monstrous human made sure she couldn't scream. Then spent the rest of his hours doing horrible things to her until she stopped making any noise at all.

He mumbled, "That's what you get, bitch," as he stepped back from his grizzly work.

New voices. Monster voices. "Well... look what we have here," said one. "Some bozo trespassing on our turf."

"Not even an innocent at that," said the other monster.

Frisk peeked. There were two skeletons. One tall, one short. The tall one filled out his bright red zoot suit with the bulk of invisible muscles. The short one wore a cheap blue suit with an untucked shirt and a loose tie strung sloppily around his neck. His bulk was more... equatorial.

"And you know what we do with guilty people, don't you?" said the tall one.

"How about we show him, eh Pap?"

"Yes, Brother," said the tall Pap.

Trumpets sounded out of nowhere. Bones flew through the air. Blue and white. How the monstrous man managed to escape, Frisk couldn't tell. He must have pulled some trick.

"What a terrible person," announced Pap.

"Yeah. Too bad they got away... and too bad for this poor schmuck."

Frisk didn't want to look at the blood any more. Or to watch the monsters do whatever they did to human flesh. But their movements jostled the pallet, which creaked. Frisk curled in on themself, trying to turn invisible by sheer force of will. A spreading patch of moist warmth temporarily relieved the deadly chill.

"What was that?" said Pap.

"I dunno. Probably a cat," said the short one.

"I'm gonna check it out," said Pap.

No. Nononononononono! Frisk peeked through their fingers, frozen in terror. Watching the tall skeleton man approach and lift up the heavy pallet in one hand.

Desperate, Frisk did the one thing that guaranteed that their foster parents didn't hit them.

They flirted.

Pap blushed and mumbled, "Aww..." and scooped Frisk up into his arms. "There, now, human," he whispered. "We don't hurt innocents." He turned and resumed his normal, boistrous speaking volume. "Hey Sans! It seems we have a witness!"

Frisk learned many things, that night. First, there was a serial killer loose in the area, someone who used the Underground's turf as a combination slaughterhouse and dumping ground. He had killed five children and uncounted adults.

Second, skeletons were warm and friendly and told really horrible puns.

Third, monsters were friendly, generous and kind.

The skeletons, both named after fonts, took Frisk to The Ruins, an otherwise quiet club where the proprietor baked the entire menu herself with fire magic. Monsters came there for rest and respite. And butterscotch-cinnamon pie.

It was there that Frisk got bathed, dressed in clean -if old- clothes, and fed an enormous slice of pie.

"Now, my child," cooed Toriel. "Tell me about the bad man, if you please?"

Frisk started to shiver. This is where they would hate them.

"It's all right, human," said Papyrus. "I, the Great Papyrus, will protect you! He can not harm you here."

Frisk signed, I don't like to speak out loud. I like to use my hands.

"Welp," said Sans, "I'm goin' to Grillby's."

"You... do not talk?"

Frisk shook their head. It makes me tired. Please don't hate me?

Toriel sighed and said, "It will be... difficult. Not impossible. You can point him out in court, should we capture him. Monster testimony against humans is... less valuable than the other way around."

Frisk signed, Sorry.

Toriel gave Frisk more pie, and left the room to talk to Papyrus. "Did he see where you took them?"

"I don't know. He's a slippery snail, that one."

"The child can stay here the night. After that, they'll have to move somewhere. If we can get them to the King's Palace..."

When they returned from their planning, Frisk signed, Please don't throw me away? and forced themself to say, "Mom."

"I know you want to stay, but it isn't safe. You have to keep moving if you want to stay away from the bad man."

Reluctantly, Frisk nodded. It was the beginning of a long and harrowing journey. But on the way, they would make some very interesting new friends. And find a new family.

(Muse food remaining: 42. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

More lessons learned

Post makeup lesson one: I should have applied vaseline.

It's the little things that "everyone knows" that trip a body up. In this case, "everyone knows" to put vaseline on body hair before applying sticky stuff.

Not I, said the mouse.

Following the usual thing-making, I shall be posting pics of my horrible face again. Be warned.

[Shown here: reassembled clock]

Beloved drilled some holes and we re-screwed in the embellishments. The bell will be pointing towards my rear, so people will

Read more »

Challenge #01124-C027: Confession for the Soul

http://soluscrow.tumblr.com/post/138136736084/otpprompts-person-a-of-your-otp-gets-a-lobster

The same prompt as before, with the added corollary-

Bonus OT3: C is the one who put the lobster in A’s pants and doesn’t tell anyone for years.

(With the Mystery Skulls group please. Bonus points for use of the empty skeleton ghost) -Gallifreya

[AN: Aw dang, and I was going to continue yesterday's post with the lobster fallout]

Some years ago.

"It's going to be alright, Arthur," Lewis soothed. "I don't

Read more »

Tests and Finessing

Be prepared. This blog contains images that some may find disturbing.

That's right, gentle readers. I finally got my keister in gear and did a makeup test.

But first - a little about what we're doing with the clock.

[Shown here: clock bits]

First, we took off the bell and the two brass feet so we could remove those weird little bracer things. They'd just get in the way.

[Shown here: Red clock insert and belt clips]

This is the result of

Read more »

Challenge #01123-C026: Camping Therapy

http://soluscrow.tumblr.com/post/138136736084/otpprompts-person-a-of-your-otp-gets-a-lobster

Person A of your OTP gets a lobster in their pants during a fishing trip (Person B is completely baffled as to how this happens) and Person B attempts to get it out while A screams and hops about. B is laughing so hard they can’t breathe. -- Gallifreya

Frisk's therapist had recommended fishing as an occupation that might get them to talk a little more. And since it was do as the therapist

Read more »

Round, round, I'm run around...

Welcome to the Last Mad Dash, the final 80Km relay in the Cosplay 2016.

Today, I am taking my admittedly limited funds to Spotlight to get the best look material for Bitzer's capelet. It has to be warm, because night-time temperatures in Tucson head to the single figures, it has to be woven, because MeMum can't pilot an overlocker, it has to look pretty nice, because Bitzer's a robot with standards, and it has to be cheap because I'm almost broke.

You

Read more »

Challenge #01122-C025: The Café of the Lost

It's present day, and the Muses get together for a re-union and catch up. The Muses of poetry also inspire writers by now. -- Knitnan.

[AN: I actually looked them up once upon a time, and they all used to inspire specific kinds of poetry. Now I know Terpsichore gets the dancers and Calliope gets the musicians... but I need to go on a wiki walk to discover who else gets what in the modern day]

The air reeked of coffee and

Read more »

Print crazy

Many of you probably don't remember the first time you got a printer. I do. Of course, this was before I found out what the internet was, but the ability to make copies of things, or even print out stuff on demand? It was like magic.

I'm pretty sure I did more damage to the rainforests of the world with my first printer than I have throughout the rest of my life. Heck, I even printed and bound a "book" of sorts,

Read more »

Challenge #01121-C024: Humans Are Space Orcs

A couple of case studies that had managed to be kept away from the general galactic knowledge pool (except under specific licensing and non-disclosure contracts) come to light - the cases of Phineas Gage, James Brady, Ahad Israfil and others that have suffered massive head injuries and made practically full recoveries, despite the loss of large amounts of brain. (And often despite the lack of medical care of the time - Phineas's accident was in the 1820s)

(Warning for Ahad, pictures from

Read more »

I got Beloved a gift!

It's always hard to shop for the snuggle-buddy who can get everything they want for themselves. Unless, that is, Aldi's happens to be selling 3D printers for $500.

The next-best commercial price for a 3D printer is around $1600, from Jaycar's. So this thing is literally less than half the price.

Caveat emptor - you have to at least know something about these things to get anything decent out of it. Including that it uses absolute meters of filament to print anything

Read more »

Challenge #01120-C023: Irreconcilably Different

http://haberdashing.tumblr.com/post/137972037479/songofsunset-fireandwonder-songofsunset -- Gallifreya

[AN: I know for a fact that there's a really bizarre bug out there. Its young can only eat this super-rare fungal growth, and they solve the problem of making more babies by having one larva gestate like a billion more larvae inside it as it eats. I can't find the name of the thing for life of me. I know David Attenborough talked about it, but that still leaves a lot of

Read more »

Progress and setbacks

I hit the 92 zone, this morning. 92.6 kilos. On one hand - hooray, I'm losing weight and that should be good for me. On the other - boo, the corset I have is now too big. And I have no idea where to get cheap and comfy corset stuffing.

I have got in contact with the corset people to see if I can swap it out for the same style in one size down. Fingers crossed that it won't break

Read more »

Challenge #01119-C022: Love Therapy

After The End, Flowey is brought to the surface too in a little flowerpot. Frisk totes him around everywhere. It's like Lilo and Stitch with more ambassadorial responsibilities. -- Gallifreya

Frisk went to bed in the police station, after the Emergence Event, in a police department T-shirt and empty-handed. When they came for them in the morning, they had a flowerpot and a talking buttercup.

There was a reason Frisk's foster families had complained about escapes, but lacked proof.

One of the

Read more »

Spoonless...

The blockage in my lungs is not preventing me from getting air, apparently. I've been taking the nebuliser to little or no actual effect. And certainly zero relief.

I couldn't sleep because of the blockage. It's a struggle to breathe in. So, long about midnight, we had the home service doctors swing on by and take a look at me. That's how I know my asthma meds are working, even though it feels like some invisible python is crushing my windpipe. Or

Read more »

Challenge #01118-C021: Benevolent Spirits

A child with a temporary tall, formally dressed, spooky friend. He has massive hands, a bone white head and....

  1. No face
  2. Flaming Purple hair -- Gallifreya

When the police finally found Velour, they didn't ask why she held one hand in the air, fingers curled as if they were gently grasping something. They did not question how a small child of four could have found her way out of the woods from the remote cabin where that sicko had her.

They just

Read more »