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Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

I'm running contest

I'm pretty darn close to having 300 followers who aren't porn blogs, so I'm doing a thank you give-away of both books and hand-made earrings. Follow the link for all details.

So not only do you have a chance of winning some excellent writing but also some of my hand-made jewelry featured in the original post. Get to it, dear readers!

In other news, I have recently heard that my stories are excellent cures for at least one relative's insomnia. Thanks. I still laughed when I heard it, though. It cheers me up to know that I can help someone get to sleep.

I also have some new whack theories about Pink Diamond and the rest of the diamonds, which I will be sharing over on my tumblr where you can enter to win some books or bling. Of course, wild mass guessing happens only after I've done my instant story, so stay tuned.

Challenge #01311-C216: Relative Insanity

"Maybe you should consider it. Who knows, you might even have...” [Person] stopped and whispered conspiratorially, “fun!"

"That's not a word, I'd have heard of it," was their flat reply. They held a straight face just long enough for [Person] to look horrified before they laughed. -- RecklessPrudence

Of all the fearsome forces in the universe, none is more terrifying than these two words issuing forth from a human mouth, "I'm bored."

Rael hadn't even known that he could get shivers up

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Well that sure worked

It was census night last night. Fortunately, in an effort to go paperless, the Aussie Government decided to allow the citizens to fill out all the census information online.

UNfortunately, this was a massive cock-up because the people running this country have no idea what happens when about twenty-three million people attempt to log into the same URL at once. They could have looked up "DOS attack" before they started. Really.

Also unfortunately, lots of the old-fashioned paper forms have been lost

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Challenge #01310-C215: The Opposite of Magic

But they just ran into the world’s best spell mangler. She has the protection of a unicorn. She carries what is probably a fully intelligent sword that can do whatever needs doing to bring justice to a situation. And she is the host of a living magical spell that likes to do things to people who try and mess with it. -- RecklessPrudence

There is magic, everyone knows this. People with the ability to wield it range from those who have

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Self-maintenance is not "work"

I've come to the realisation that I class my self-maintenance regimes as "work". As in, I tend not to do them when I'm having a relax day.

This is bad.

I need to maintain myself because the backslide takes a lot of time to recover from. And it's happening faster and steeper as I get older.

I also need to keep in contact with MeMum because Time is a bastard. I am a scatterbrained doodle and this week makes it worse.

Ugh.

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Challenge #01309-C214: I am Immortal, You're Not

Oh my god wonder of wonders an ancient semi-immortal race understands that time is valuable. -- RecklessPrudence

Immortals have some odd habits. One that stands out is spending hundreds of years on perfecting Apple Pie. Right down to breeding the perfect apple, the right kind of bees, and just the right kind of grain.

Currently, Duroc the Everlasting was analysing the maple sap for the correct kind of sweetness.

Heaven help the world when she finally decided to work on the ice

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Ekka Monday! Yay

Welcome, one and all, to the most frelled-up school week in Queensland. Because of the Royal National Agricultural exhibition, everyone has Wednesday off, and various school children in various districts get an extra day of the week off of school.

If that extra day happens on a Monday, then you get an awful lot of sickies being thrown on the following Tuesday. Or, as we like to call it, "the super long weekend". Similar things happen to the Thursday if the day

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Challenge #01308-C213: Modern Fable

Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. -- RecklessPrudence

Sacrifice is noble. There is no doubt. Those who turn aside their wants for the needs of others are truly glorious. They have honour. They gain kharma points. And some gain respect.

Most, however, are expected to sacrifice more.

The fable is told of those who sacrifice everything. The Giving Tree is just one. There is another... the Perfect Mother.

She gave up her employment so she could give her children

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Things that make my day

Nothing much happened yesterday, and nothing much is planned for today. So instead of complaining about that, or revelling in it... have a list of things that cheer me up in no particular order.

  • Really good chocolate
  • Hot bubble-baths
  • Snuggle time with Beloved
  • Actually catching an SPG art stream while I'm awake
  • Making a quality pun and watching everyone else slowly collapse from the pain
  • Steam Powered Giraffe in general
  • Steam Powered Giraffe in person [Ultra-rare!]
  • No-brand cheap-as-F tea with 3 sugars
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Challenge #01307-C212: Re-forming Content

Someone who just 'removed' the tyrant, and has put their non-evil child in charge, after confronting them with the fact that the parent they loved was a tyrannical dictator sacrificing their people for their own vainglory: "My condolences on your coronation. You're welcome." -- RecklessPrudence

Queen Kindness the First had loved her father. Her days revolved around the hours that he came to her suites and played with her, or read to her, or listened while she talked and they strolled through

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Ah, weekends...

I have plans to do not a lot of anything very much and I am going to LOVE it.

And since it's a long weekend, that's even better. Nothing much to do for three days. My only responsibility will be my writing. A nice, relaxing slob-around.

You watch. Something's going to happen to muck that nonse up.

The best-laid plans of me in particular always go agley. It's a sad truth. Good thing for me that I'm pretty flexible.

For the terminally

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Challenge #01306-C211: One Wrong Word

"In my defense, I didn't know calling the Prince a 'dummy' would be considered an act of treason." -- OohLookShiny

In a sense, her defense was a compliment. The artisans responsible for the Prince's artificial body had done such work that the simulacrum holding his soul to the mortal realm looked amazingly lifelike.

She hadn't known that he was a human soul residing in a constructed body. And they were so rare, so expensive, that they were a last resort against worse

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I need to mainline caffeine

Woke up at 3:30 AM because my back decided to hate me. Fitful sleep thereafter because Beloved snores. Beloved snores because their sinus is clogged up and won't use my nasal luge kit.

Same clogging of the sinuses that gives Beloved a lack of sleep that makes it my duty to see the kids to school in the AM. Regardless of how much or how little sleep I've firkin had.

I'm wrecked.

This is the third night in a row that

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Challenge #01305-C210: Where the Weirdoes Go

"I just want to collect arcade tokens, why does that bring out the weirdos?" -- SeaDragon1012

[AN: Once again, I invite all my registered users to opt in for a free plug of their blog/site over here]

"Maybe it's because this entire place is weird? I swear I've seen that same Polybius cabinet in four different places."

"Haha, maybe it's a TARDIS, haha," Carol droned. "It's a games con. Of course someone's going to have a Polybius cabinet. It's like the

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Uuuuuuuggghhhhh...

Last night was not a great night. For a start, I was worn out from all the shenanigans outlined in my last real-life blog entry. I was tired and worn out and out of spoons. I should have slept the sleep of the unjust.

Nope.

I could not settle. Every car coming by could be the car that brought my Beloved home. I finally fell into a fitful slumber, only to wake once more in what I presume was the wee small

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