Day Zero

A 130-post collection

Thursday, Day 0, Maundy Moneys

Not only is it Maundy Thursday - the traditional day when the highfalutin hand out "Maundy Money" - it's also April Fools' Day. At least in Aus. Tomorrow's when the pranks really emerge from the intertubes. Be warned.

I'll probably stick to puns when I get to thinking them up.

Today, the PLN is to do my usual work nonsense with unfucking the house on the side because tomorrow is a public holiday. Yay.

I may or may not get on that thing about scams I've lived through today. Time will tell. I've been sleeping a lot more and that might be a direct result of Plague Panic (tm).

Three new cases today, two local transmissions. Seventy-one total active cases, sixty-six in hospital and one in ICU. That's ten left over to potentially wreak havoc.

In the news:

  • Lockdown's going to be longer and we all know it, but the news is making hype about this
  • SA launches a tourism campaign that spells out a rude word containing the initials for the Northern Territory
  • Continuing outrage over vaccine passports
  • Mystery missing Melbourne couple may have been spotted hundreds of kilometers away
  • 6YO with Down Syndrome vanishes after playing naked in the mud :\
  • Vanlife instagram star kills herself
  • Man who got the Johnson&Johnson vax had his skin peel off in a weird allergic reaction
  • Daryl Sommers, host of Hey Hey It's Saturday regrets the racism of his show
  • Aussie weather is going off the shits, blame climate change

It is time for fiction.

Wednesday, Day 0, Wordpress

TEN new cases, eight of those local transmissions. Seventy-eight total, sixty-four in hospital, two in ICU, which leaves twelve with the relative freedom of a hotel room until they are clear. Masks are mandatory for when you go anywhere and we are hunkering and bunkering and just being blobs for the interim.

Judging by the acceleration, we're going to be locked down for a lot longer than the three days. We've done this before and we can do it again. Of course,

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Tuesday, Day 0, Locked Down

Brisbane, and perhaps the greater portion of Southeast Queensland, has been locked down for three days. I got this news in the afternoon of yesterday. Ten new cases this morning, four of them local. Seventy-three total active cases, sixty-three in hospital, and two in the ICU. That means eight people are stuck in a well-furnished box and bingeing Netflix or whatever.

I... am trying my hardest not to spiral into my previous lockdown mood, which was huddling in the bedroom and seeking

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Monday, Day 0, here comes Scheherezade

Three new cases, Seventy-one total, sixty-six in hospital and two in the ICU. So that's three left spinning their wheels in a hotel somewhere. According to our PM, only one of those new cases is a local transmission.

Adding to the panic is the fact that the bloke initially diagnosed said he held a party whilst still infectious. Miscommunication, actually, since the party consisted of him and his four housemates, who are already isolated.

Grrr.

TAFKASPG has continued being an annoyance, so

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Sunday, Day 0, It's Loose

There's another case of local transmission this morning. Six new cases. Seventy-one total. Sixty-two in hospital. Two in the ICU. That's seven with the potential to cause even more trouble.

I'm not looking at the news this morning because Toasty's streaming already and there are untold PLNs of Beloved happening later on after sunrise. So now I'm trying to get as much done before I find out what else is going on.

I may be required to drive after minimal sleep -_

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Saturday, Day 0, Scramble

According to the government, there's seven new cases and the news is a new local transmission. I heard ten cases yesterday afternoon, but I have to trust the official sources.

Sixty-nine total cases [not nice], sixty-two in hospital, two in the ICU... and five remaining in captivity. It's hard to not panic.

Case 0 is in Stafford and has been communicable for a week. The alert is out for the Brisbane and Moreton City areas, so not in my or MeMum's neck

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Friday, Day 0, Shenanigans Commence

There's three new cases, sixty-five active, sixty-two in hospital and one in ICU. Two apparently free to chill in a hotel somewhere. At least according to my math. I have all sorts of assorted shenanigan going on and one big difference between now and every other Friday before.

Today is Payday!

::curlytoot noise::

That's right, folks. I'm giving myself money I've already earned at a rate sufficient to fly under Mr Taxman's radar. Don't worry, I also already earned it at a

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Thursday, Day 0, Keep rolling rolling rolling...

I made a phone call! I got the data! I've got things shifting about! WHEEEE!

There's four more cases, sixty-seven total, sixty-two of those are in hospital... and one in the ICU. Four people are relatively free.

Thanks to an unexpected hike in Bitcoin at a local level, I now have a LOT more than I need. I'm plotting to help some people out wherever and whenever I can. But I'm still siphoning off value from my Peakd account because the fuckup

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Wednesday, Day 0, the Germans have a word for this...

Three new cases this morning, sixty total, fifty-seven in hospital and one in ICU. Which means that two of them are apparently waiting for the inevitable. Argh. At least they're all from other places and we don't need to worry until one of them escapes the security measures.

What the Germans probably have a word for is "the sensation that your life has become needlessly complicated". And to be honest, there's a definite sense of "the house that Jack built" to the

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Tuesday, Day 0, Shrinky Shenanigans

Four new cases, today. Fifty-eight active cases. Fifty-four in hospital, two in ICU. That leaves only two who are spinning their wheels in quarantine. The artist formerly known as Spanish Prison Guard[TAFKASPG] has decided to knuckle down and actually do the work they promised me. I hope.

They've turned suddenly polite now that I don't have a lot of ready cash to siphon from my Peakd account. I remain suspicious.

Today, I am writing everything on the go. Today, I am

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Monday, Day 0, PLNs in motion

There's two new cases, today. The total active count's at fifty-four, with fifty-two of those in hospital and two in the ICU. Nobody's chilling in a Queensland hotel today.

I'm draining my Peakd account, which is a test of endurance, and watching the markets as they haver and haw. With good fortune and good timing, I shall be able to have the money I need to finally fix the bathroom by June. It's just that slow, folks.

I mean, look at this:

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Sunday, Day 0, Stream Day

Four new cases, giving us a total of fifty eight active cases. Three patients in ICU, fifty-four in hospital. So I'm guessing that only the four newest ones are the ones who aren't in hospital yet. This is scary beans. No local transmission, but... also more chances of it kicking off.

I'm powering down my Peakd account for reasons that are related to the continuing need to fix our bathroom before the sink finally breaks someone's leg. There's other reasons, but I'm

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Saturday, Day 0, Shenanigans

There's nine new cases. NINE. Fifty-eight active cases. Only nine of them are chilling outside a hospital. Yikes on bikes going on hikes.

Despite my inclinations to buy a bunker at this point, we have a scavenger hunt today. Digging up or obtaining the things necessary for Chaos' planned two-day jaunt in the wilds of the Aussie bush. There's a lot of stuff. Fortunately we have some of it from Mayhem's days in the Scouts [all five of them lol] but there's

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Friday, Day 0, Digging a bunker...

There's EIGHT firkin new cases, all from overseas, and the total depends on who you're asking. Forty-eight in Premier Palaszczuk's twitter, Thirty-nine if you're looking at the government website. Either way, I'm e-shopping for bunker options in case it turns into the zombie apocalypse.

Kidding. The closest I get to leaving my house is going out to eliminate weeds in the yard. I personally pulled up enough goatweed and cobblers' pegs1 to clear access to the shed for the landbarge. Yay.

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Thursday, Day 0, I Have PLNs

Six new cases, totaling forty-one, thirty-five are in hospital and one is still in the ICU. So that means five people are chilling in their hotel rooms and awaiting freedom.

Beloved has received a pair of gloves they don't remember buying. Perhaps they are in lieu of the fun-sized chainsaw they ordered and still haven't received. That alone makes me less inclined to buy that fab lying-down desk I keep seeing whenever I browse Tumblr on my phone. But oh the temptation.

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