Amalgam Universe

A 2337-post collection

Challenge #02229-F039: Special Talents

"Am I weird?"

"Yes, that's why we get along." -- Anon Guest

They say things like, There's always one, or, Strange is as strange does; but what they generally mean by that is, Look at the statistical outlier. It's not always done with malice, but it certainly feels that way when one is on the receiving end. For those who experience this sort of thing first hand, it's interesting how the statistical outliers are reviled and expelled from groups as "too strange" or other disparaging remarks... until such time as that outlier factor becomes useful in some way.

Such as, for instance, a morbid fascination with all things Human. This was Gurx's weird hobby in their youth, and now had become an asset aboard the Skulk and Sniff as it plied the asteroid fields of Nenkus IV. Now, instead of being, "creepily fascinated," or, "ghoulish," Gurx was now, "so good with them," and, "so capable with communicating between species." Which just goes to show how cogniscents everywhere are willing to reclassify unusual traits as soon as they become blatantly necessary.

Gurx had an able command of Human phraseologies, sayings, and memetic communications that bordered as close to expert as anyone could get without certification from a Xeno-communications course at a top-level educational establishment. Since she didn't have such certifications, the corporate body behind the Skulk and Sniff's mission could excuse lowering their overall costs because Gurx's education was freelance[1]. Explaining this to the Humans took some time, but they understood entirely too well.

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Challenge #02228-F038: Tactile Rewards

Human giving an alien scritches.

"I'm not a pet, you know."

"Do you want me to stop?"

"…No" -- TheDragonsFlame

The one thing one must remember about Humans, Thrikki wrote in her journal, apart from the most obvious like the whole Deathworlder thing, is that they are incredibly tactile. They reach out to feel things just to experience what it feels like. They reassure themselves on the presence of their fellows. They show affection through touch.

Human Cass was doing just that,

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Challenge #02227-F037: Think of the Children

An alien equivalent of a lawyer is studying up on various human court cases and stumbles upon a series of cases from family courts dated up to the mid 2030s citing "deviant sexual attitudes" or "deviant sexuality" as reasons for being an unsuitable parent. Upon consultation with its human liaison as to the nature of these cases, the alien discovers the murky and dark legal situations around kinks. -- Anon Guest

For those seeking further proof of Human Insanity, look no further

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Challenge #02226-F036: Simple Metallurgical Skills

They were doomed. The copper tin alloy for the critical drive component they desperately needed was on a planet weeks away, and even if they had it, they couldn't make the part on the ship.

That's when the human walked into the bridge mopping sweat off hir brow.

"All fixed let's go."

"What do you mean all fixed?"

"Simply, I made a cast of the part with the pieces, then melted down the original and re cast it. It should last to

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Challenge #02224-F034: The Better Mousetrap Paradox

"Why do you carry a device only for recording your voice?"

"I think too quick to type anything down" -- Anon Guest

"There are auto-dictation programs galore," added Phrel. "Voice to text."

"Except they come with autocorrect and it takes a freaking age to teach them my personal lexicon. I'm a self-confessed weirdo that way. It's much easier for me to record the audio, slow it down, and use an older autodict to take a best guess at all the spelling. Then

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Challenge #02223-F033: Treasure (n)

The Archivaas learning about the libraries at Alexandria and Timbuktu -- Anon Guest

They say that if you want to annoy a Human Librarian, you should get them started on the Library of Alexandria. It's one of the more famous instances of knowledge destruction in Human history. It's famous as one of the most devastating hits to human progress in all of their devastating histories of Humankind, right next to the Shattering.

Less well-known is the fact that the Library of Alexandria

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Challenge #02222-F032: Snapping Point

(Sorry for everything bad in this prompt. My grammar isn't perfect. Anyway English isn't my native language :/)

Obsession about humans is almost natural in some species. Scientists literally love watching their human beings on tests. But some scientists went too far, when they ask: How much pain can human endure before they give up? -- Anon Guest

[AN: No worries, Nonny. When I encounter a prompt with obvious grammatical or spelling errors, I fix them up so that the soul of the

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Challenge #02221-F031: The Wager Motivation

Humans have a way of betting that causes the right people for a particular challenge to attempt what is at the time seemingly impossible.

An Inducement prize Contest like the "Ansari X prize" for making the first reusable private Spacecraft, or a Wager like the story of "Around the world in 80 days", even just friends and the ole "Hold my beer".

Humans strive to do the impossible because they like to win. It's in the DNA -- Adam from Darwin

The

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Challenge #02220-F030: Revelations

With so many deathworlders in the crew, there was bound to be at least one personal chamber decorated in horror and all things creepy. That was not surprising in the least. The surprising part is that this is the room of a class 5 havenworlder. -- Anon Guest

They called him Floofy, and they adored him. He was agreebly the softest, prettiest, cutest member of the team. As a Class 5 Havenworlder, though, Floofy was very delicate. His species preferred to let

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Challenge #02218-F028: They Don't Do That Anymore

Some aliens got fed up with the humans on board. So, they set up speakers to make loud or ominous noises every time a human walked near. -- Anon Guest

Psychological warfare has been banned in the Galactic Alliance, and those who wish to bring it back are quickly educated about the Whisker Incident. It was, at least in the beginning, a study on crew incompatibility, but like most social experiments of a certain nature[1], it escalated too quickly and got

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Challenge #02217-F027: Complexities of Simple Experiments

Humans tend to shine ridiculously bright spotlights into the sky. Imagine an alien vessel going past and being blinded by these lights. -- Anon Guest

[AN: Most of our lights don't work like that. They're dissipated by the atmosphere and disperse as they go further from the source. By the time you're at cruising altitude for airplanes, they're invisible to even the most perceptive of observers. That said, we're busy inventing some pretty gnarly lights...]

Humans like to prove things are possible.

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Challenge #02216-F026: The Boredom Compulsion

This rumination on Queen's three types of songs, as seen by aliens trying to understand these odd Deathworlders. -- RecklessPrudence

If there is anything to cause the Human brain to skip a few gears, it's listening to The Prophet's Song followed by Fat Bottomed Girls. Both are clearly sung by the same man. Learning that both are written by the same man just makes the disparity more obvious.

One is a philosophical piece about those who foresee doom down the road and

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Challenge #02215-F025: Strange Instruments

I have no idea why, but I kinda wanna see what you make with this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lTYPvArbGo

sorry if its too hard. -- Anon Guest.

The travelling Museum of Sound History had docked with Amalgam and, naturally, Shayde had to drag Rael into it. She had been catching up on a decent portion of the five hundred years she had missed, and seeing some of it in one lump was always a guaranteed 'draw' for her.

One

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Challenge #02214-F024: Ill Met in Sarkis Ten

Class 5 Deathworlders react to the information of human self-cannibalism in extreme situations. -- Anon Guest

Class one Deathworlders only have one elemental portion of their environment attempting to kill them. Class two get two of them. All the way up to level five, with the plants, the animals, the geology, the climate, and astronomy of their solar system repeatedly attempting to kill them. They get to be Deathworlders by surviving all of this and making it out to discover that there

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Challenge #02212-F022: Companion Ship

A human finally finds a crew member who understands their sarcasm. -- Anon Guest

You have to be careful when you're a human around non-humans. Not all of them understand intonation, and just use your words. Sarcasm may be lost on the slow of mind, but it's also lost on those with different tonal coding to you. Worse - sometimes it's both.

Helpful hint to other humans like me who keep using sarcasm out of habit. Always point out why the sarcastic

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