Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Why the X-Men are no longer allowed at the zoo, and why Kurt got offered a summer internship there.

(#00203)

For a change, it wasn’t Kurt’s fault. He had been minding his own business, chatting to the elephants in Mahout at the time.

Logan, as tour guide, was waxing lyrical about the predators when a lioness, recognizing a threat, neatly snagged his face from behind and tried to drag him inside.

Fourteen mutants unleashed their powers at once, resulting in general panic, twenty escapes, and overall mayhem.

Kurt was the one who came to the rescue, with the help of the zoo’s Auntie of the elephants. Rescuing lost children onto her back and herding the escapees into cul-de-sacs where they could at least do no further harm until the cavalry arrived.

Ironically, Logans’ lecture had been about how wild animals could not be pets. He had not counted on being Exhibit A.

Sixteen mutants, including Logan, had gone on the field trip. Fifteen were banned from ever coming back. One got a job offer.

“…as a what?”

“Apprentice keeper,” said Kurt as he brushed his face. “I don’t get it. All I said was I had experience with the circus animals and he got this look… I felt like I had parsley in my ears.“

"Do you have any idea how rare it is to find someone your age with experience in the field?” pondered Ororo. “Most kids who try to sign up for a zoo job think it’s all playing with monkeys and grooming the kitty-cats…"

“…and draw the line at sweeping up poop, ja?”

“Poop’s only the beginning,” said Ororo darkly. “I paid off my university fees working there. Many of those poor creatures are rescued from rich pet-owners who think that owning a silverback is just like owning a capuchin.“

Kurt winced.

"Exactly,” she let herself into his room and sat so she could face him. “Given the trouble with your image inducer… are you sure you want to do this?“

"Frau… The way he was so glad to see me? I think he’d hire me if I had four feet.”

It only took him three weeks to patch together the beginnings of a crowd-drawing animal act. Whether or not the zoo owner, Mr Edmunton, ever knew of Kurt’s unique appearance, the rest of the X-men never knew.

But they were allowed to attend the show in small groups. Under guard.

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Challenge #00202: Haunted

Your ghosts never really leave you

[Feels Warning: Contains imminent demise]

Miles fought for his next breath. He was dying. He knew it. Ekaterin knew it. His beloved little army knew it. Only his grandchildren were really still in denial.

In all honesty, it was surprising he lasted this long.

Damn meds they had him on were giving him some interesting reactions. Just as well, really, since the decor at ImpMil sucked dead donkey balls. Everything was very, very interesting. And he

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Challenge #00201: A Kiss of Home

“ How long has it been since I’ve stood in the rain? ”

Lyr could only predict that the individual who called herself Shayde would ‘bring trouble’ if they let her out of her isolated environment. However, since the genetechs had concocted and released a super immunoflu that once again vaccinated known populations against extinct diseases like measles, they had increasingly less reasons to keep her there.

Humans were considered insane by the larger populations of the galactic

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Challenge #00200: You're in Good Hands With Mawlitt-Badlii

“We’re very particular about how it should be handled. Do you understand that?”

“Of course we understand,” said the human. “We’re a cargo company that takes anything, anywhere, anytime, and we always follow instructions.”

“Yes,” said T'griis. “But the phonetic pronunciation of your company name…”

The human grinned in a way that clearly pronounced that they didn’t want to grin at all. “We’

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Challenge #00199: Spiritus in Machina

Lives and souls to buy, sell or trade

[Trigger warning: Most of the story that takes place occurs on one of the Greater Deregulations where women are property]

When Mary woke, she knew she wasn’t Mary any more. The strange feeling of duality that had accompanied every update so far was not there, just an echoing sensation of emptiness.

It was a peculiar thing to wake up and realize that you must have died sometime after your last save.

The

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progressiveauspol: Invisible things are ridiculous says man who lives his life according to a invisible thing A Sydney man who believes an...

progressiveauspol:

Invisible things are ridiculous says man who lives his life according to a invisible thing

A Sydney man who believes an invisible spiritual being created the earth, impregnated a woman and devised intricate views on what constitutes a family, says the Emissions Trading Scheme is flawed because carbon emissions are not visible to the human eye. 

The man, who also hopes to become Australia’s next Prime Minister, is the same man who once described the Clean Energy Regulator as a

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Challenge #00198: Everyday Miracles

Ok hope I am doing this right!

The universe and all the wonders it has to offer

[AN: Yes, you are]

There’s always one. The long-term tourist or peripatetic individual who never lost their sense of wonder. You could always pick them out of the crowd.

They looked around.

Everyone else stared down or straight ahead, lost in the haze of self-delusion that every spaceport was the same and nothing ever changed.

This one had everything in a backpack and

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Prompt: attack of the fire-breathing sheep

(#00197)

“Lord Drixol’s castle is aflame!”

“No it isn’t, it’s a whacking great pile of stone.”

There always had to be a literalist in the crowd. “It’s on fire.“

"His creations are escaping! Run for your lives!”

“Um,” said the literalist. “It’s just one creature.“ They checked their pocket telescope. “And it appears to be a sheep.”

“Lord Drixol made a sheep?”

Three humble

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Prompt: the Klaus Wulfenbach Fan Club

(#00196)

“This city is now part of the Wulfenbach Empire.”

“EEEeeeeeEEEEEeeeeEEEEEeeee!”

It was not the horrified scream he was used to. These people - all underage women, he noted - were delighted to hear such news. He glared at them. None were familiar faces.

“Are you ladies… all right?”

“EEEeeeeeEEEEEeeeeEEEEEeeee!” One fainted. Three fanned themselves. Two were crying. All seemed ecstatic that he had turned his attentions their ways.

He sighed. Teenaged hysteria. It

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