InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12667 posts

The Continuing Adventures....

When we last left our heroes, the cat was on the mend, some bills were paid, and MeMum had a semi-reliable internet connection.

That's been more or less fixed, now.

The cat may still need eye surgery because her eyelid is halfway turned inside out and she firkin hates eyedrops [and so do I] which will be another triple-figure bill if the Vet has anything to say about it. AND the air conditioner in the room where I work has decided that it's not actually going to cool the air.

To add insult to injury, the electric shock based foot massager I stole from Beloved has decided not to do its core function any more. That's the least of my financial woes, but it makes me want to challenge the universe with a "now what?"

I know better than to ask. Murphy's Law is very good at supplying answers.

Boy, I could use a "small" loan of a million dollars from Donald Trump's dad. Think he'd take in a plebe? Ha. Yeah. I thought not.

If I ever get to the stage where I have more money than I know what to do with? I will look around for the peeps who need it and give it to them directly. I don't want charity paperwork eating a majority of the money.

Ah, but those are dreams for a very distant tomorrow. Right now? I can't even figure out how to get there. Besides somehow selling billions of my books.

Beloved hates that I spend every minute of the mornings on my compy - but it's the only time that I can write without roasting myself. If I had a laptop, I could work wherever the AC did, but that's currently not an option. $2K ballpark on the lappy of my dreams. Plus whatever the shop that has it decides to tack on top.

On the saving-up-for-cool-shit scene, my dreams account is back up to the $200 I started with. Maybe I can actually save some money from my lit work this time. But I'm currently keeping that $32 in my Paypal because Steam Powered Giraffe is bringing out another album very soon, and that band gives me a reason to keep going through several assorted personal hells.

Plus I want the game associated with it. I may yet annoy our local game retailer and see if I can pre-order. I still have $10 birthday money lurking about.

But not today.

Today is yet another day of dealing with life's bullshit and trying to get my daily allotment of writing done before the atmosphere in here makes me melt.

Wish me luck.

Challenge #01012-B280: Didn't Think Things Through

Inspired by The Best Friends RE4 playthru. When the bad guy turns themself into a giant impractical monster, what's the plan for afterward? I mean you beat the hero but now what? -- SeaDragon2012

The gigantic monster looked down the endless abyss that the hero had fallen down to their ultimate defeat.

Victory! Victory at last!

Now all the power in the world was theirs. All they had to do was enter the portal...

...that was made for more normal-sized humans.

The

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Challenge #01011-B279: Trolling at an Intersection

Let's see what the SPOEn think of this quote:

“English is the product of a Saxon warrior trying to make a date with an Angle bar-maid, and as such is no more legitimate than any of the other products of that conversation.” ― H. Beam Piper, Fuzzy Sapiens -- care of RecklessPrudence

[AN: You really love fucking with the SPOEns, don't you?]

Shayde loved grafitti corners. They were an excellent avenue for both spleen-venting and art. And sometimes the art of provocation.

Just

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Post-Halloween ouchies

Halloween was a moderate success for Chaos [Mayhem skipped out because birthday party.

We went off to a more densely populated area and sought out every house with a front door light on. Chaos was happy enough to quit after one neighbourhood.

My feet are still mad at me. I haven't walked that much for a very long time [I used to crisscross the Brisbane City Centre on a regular basis] but haunting one neighbourhood with Chaos in tow was too much

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Challenge #01010-B278: History Q&A

Anything they were willing to try using as fuel during the space race is volatile enough to qualify as an emergency explosive, including the stuff they actually used for launches. -- RecklessPrudence

"They didn't try less volatile launch methods? Like low-orbit flight and gas boosting?"

"Or maglev railgun shots?" suggested another member of Shayde's audience.

"They were thought of, awright. But they were too expensive and too slow. It was a race, ye ken. Braggin' rights tae th' first one on the

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Our internet is still fucked

Currently using my phone for all data needs, including reblogging stuff on Tumblr.

This is going to cost me a frelling fortune... BUT... I also need to keep this blog active.

Good news for my loyal followers: You will be seeing a lot more fanfic and other original content here, because the staff behind Tumblr have gone insane and decided to obliterate one of their key functionalities - tag tracking.

I will start with anything I've posted on Tumblr since the shift.

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Challenge #01009-B277: What's Nice About Prophecies?

Prophecy Wreckers, Local 182 -- RecklessPrudence

"See this?" The union Chief waved a battered tome. "This is why prophecies are vaguely-worded and open to interpretation. These 'nice and accurate' prophecies are going to be the end of us!"

The Chair opened it at random. The first prophecy her finger fell on read, "Ygnorre thif ye daft olde fool. Thif if being myne gift to myne defendantf."

"Er," said a fellow member, reading over the Chair's shoulder. "I think she knew about us.

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Challenge #01008-B276: Draco Persistent

Always be yourself.

Unless you can be a Dragon.

Then be a Dragon. -- RecklessPrudence

The subject stood between two doors. Three, if one counted the one they'd just entered.

"The choice lies before you," said the oracle. "You can return to the world you once knew, to the self you once knew, and only remember your time here as a dream. You can transform, again, and fly with the dragons, and remember everything. Or... you can chose to retain the life

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Ow! I must be anxious.

True story: I internalise my anxieties for the most part, and when I do, it comes out as me hurting myself.

I went down the aisle towards my Beloved with a giant fucking elastoplast on the bottom of my foot because I stood on a double-adapter [prong side up of course] mere days before the big event.

I have a knack for being distracted enough to walk right into random cars' tow balls.

And today?

I just burned myself for the second

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Challenge #01007-B275: Karma Incorporated

It's not like this is the first time I've had to negotiate with someone I've stolen from while duct taped to a chair. -- RecklessPrudence

I completely understand why you're upset. You have lots of nice stuff and I'd like to keep it too. I mean, if it was legitimately mine.

Please, I promise it's okay. I'm only after ill-gotten gains. You know... like those diamonds? In the safe?

Yeah. The safe you caught me cracking. That safe. The diamonds were purchased

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::Zombie Noises::

I am guilty of waking my best Beloved after a very long and exhausting day that started at 1AM.

I already had a long and exhausting day, one of the few bright points being that the four hour round trip only took three hours. Yay. BUT I also had a problem.

I was waiting for Chaos' bus to come in from AQ, the school she goes to three days out of the week. The cat, freshly home, had wriggled out of her

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Challenge #01006-B274: Love Cancels Out

http://soggywarmpockets.tumblr.com/post/131148066044

Any expansion on this presumably adorable relationship. -- Anon Guest

[AN: That post makes me LOL every time]

It was fairly common to see Barbarians and Bards as couples, but an Evil-aligned Barbarian and a Good-aligned Bard? That caused some talk. Especially when they started.

Both their parties had disowned them. The Evil Overlord whatsisface had essentially excommunicated Borgog, and the Good King somebeardedguy had declared Tuergar Trueheart a traitor to his people.

Tears, of course,

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Uuuuuggggh...

Panic stations, full speed ahead.

$600 owing on Chaos' autism school. The only plus side is this is the last payment ever for a $1.3K/Semester tuition fee.

$600 owing to the vet because I panicked and took the cat to the vet and tests for cancer are spelled with multiple dollar signs.

MeMum has promised me some cash, BUT... I can't spend it on the cat. So - food and petrol :P Also, I have to collect it in person.

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Challenge #01005-B273: Bird Spotting

The cassowary is basically a smaller emu which was apparently created in response to complaints that emus were too sane and peaceable. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: You have seen that vine where Emus don't know how to handle a Weasel Ball... right?]

"Let me get this straight. There is a flightless bird native to your planet of origin that is, on average, one point four five Distance Units and Fifty-five Weight units of murderous intent in feathers... and it is the saner counterpart

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