Instant Story

I am actually serious here, insofar as one can have a serious discussion about the cost/benefit analysis of destroying the universe.

“There’s only really a benefit if you have a working means to exit the universe, otherwise you destroy yourself in the process.” Paua’tul’xand’l side-eyed her human companion. “You haven’t been experimenting with methods of leaving the universe, have you?”

“I promise I’m not working on it.” Eiridd held up three fingers of one hand and made an X across her chest with the other. “I’m just spitballing, you know. Something to fill the time in.”

Ah. Yes. Humans had cornered the market on boredom. It was what drove their species to seek interesting new places to be, things to do, and life forms to attempt mating with. “Sometimes, it astonishes me that your kind made it to space with so few fatalities.”

“Thanks,” Eiridd grinned. “Obviously, there’s a lot of speculative factors, you know. There’s no such thing as a complete map, for a start. There’s no way to know the ultimate worth of our universe from the perspective of another.”

“You could try asking a Xyrak’l.”

Eiridd sighed. “You are really lousy at thought experiments, did you know that?”

“The last twenty times you told me, yes. And thank you.”

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“Don’t worry. It’ll all go according to plan,” I reassured her that my plan was flawless.

Now I just needed to come up with one.

Rule one of coming up with a plan: work with what you’ve got. In this case, two rubber bands and a paperclip, and the clothes she stood up in if she was really that desperate.

Rule two: The environment is also what you’ve got. Nigh-seamless corridors made out of

“This is according to your plan?”
“Yes.”
“What kind of plan was that?”
“The plan was -Do not die.- All is still going according to plan… barely.”

“This is why,” raged Krel over the gunfire aimed in their general direction. “This is why I never get involved with humans!”

“Awright,” admitted Jude. “This is something of a tight spot.”

“TIGHT? We’re cornered

Don’t want to have people commenting your sudden bout of suicidal stupidy by taunting murphy?

How about not taunt murphy?

[AN: I did leave instructions on the Submissions box to only pick up to three tags. Otherwise I have to whittle your collection of tags down to three so I can add my own tags. Please remember this when picking tags for your prompts.]

This media was not only old, but it had been played to the point of nearing uselessness

Don’t worry. He comes up with crazy ideas, but they’re so crazy they actually work half the time.

“…hey!” said exhibit A, aka Hwell Barrow. “I’ll have you know I have a ninety-eight percent success rate.”

“It’s the two percent that bites my tail,” Ax'and'l managed through gritted teeth. “And we agreed that there would be no bickering in front of potential clients.”

“If we agreed

And, isn’t sanity really just a one-trick pony anyway? I mean all you get is one trick, rational thinking, but when you’re good and crazy, oooh, oooh, oooh, the sky is the limit!”

“Awright. Yes. Humans as a race are kinda nuts,” Hwell admitted. “There’s lots of things I can’t immediately explain.”

“And your individual susceptibility to Silly Season,” added Ax'and'l. “What evolutionary advantage is there on picking up

Most certainly a [species] spy in disguise. I mean not. Not a [species] spy. Human. Completely human. Yes.

“Oh, now, come on,” said the Doctor. “That can’t be a Friendly. That’s obviously a Golgafraxan spy in disguise. Do none of you notice her complexion?”

“Doctor…”

“If it is a her. They get the genders mixed up.”

“Doctor…”

“Look I’ll prove it. Golgafraxans react