(Prompt from CallMeGallifreya on Tumblr)
Midnight munchies whilst couch-surfing is always a crap-shoot. You never know which one is going to be any extreme from "I only eat what I hunt" to "I'm a twelfth-level vegan and I've been raided fifteen times because of my hydroponic grain garden". And on the scale between Critter Hearts and Quinoa Crumble, I guess a fridge mostly full of blood packs kinda takes the cake.
Or black sausage.
One shelf was reserved for a hastily-purchased selection of munchables that included, for some reason, three different packets of potato chips and a quart of flavoured milk. I moved the chips to the pantry and discovered some perishables in there that should have really been in the fridge. Thank synchronicity that they were all still chilled.
It was like Otto hadn't really shopped for food in some time. Or had ever put anything away for himself.
I binged on the cookies so that there was room for the bacon. Yeah, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Otto found me like that, munching cookies and pondering the blood bags.
"Er," he said. "I can explain the blood?"
"I figured you'd have a story," I said. "Can you explain why it looks like you've never stored food in your life?"
"Fine," Ottoe growled. "I'm a vampire. I need blood to live."
"Dude. Have you never heard of coconut water?"