Humans Are Space Orcs

Challenge #02505-F315: Useful in a Pinch

A: how pure should the acid be?

B: doesn’t matter as long it be acidic

A: kk

then I proceeded to watch the human put their finger down their throat -- Anon Guest

[AN: Content warning for vomiting]

Humans are great at improvising. Provided, of course, that you don't mind the kind of improvisation that Humans are capable of. For example, do not lock them in an empty room with nothing but a screwdriver and a hammer. Don't even think of locking them in a room with nothing. That's even worse.

Zhyruk knew this, and was sure to look for any interesting playthings for the Ship's Human, Zan. Today, though, that was not the problem. The problem was being stuck in a partially-collapsed old hulk left on a Trashworld. The main article blocking the way could, fortunately, be dissolved by acid.

"Can it be any acid, and does it matter how pure it is?" asked Human Zan. So far, they were doing the heavy lifting, and had picked up a number of objects that ze had said could be useful. Since ze had also figured out various means of carrying them, Zhyruk was not yet ready to complain.

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Challenge #02500-F310: Bear's Big Story

Human Ryan came highly recommended by other Galactic Alliance Scientists and Explorers who had worked with him. As a 'gun for hire' he had survived more than a few wars, notably against other humans and the Vorax Fleets (notes that also had me reaching for my calming medicine). On the flip-side he was highly protective of the lives put in his charge. Braving hostile Flora, Fauna and even the very planets themselves to keep his promise of "no one is left behind.

Challenge #02488-F298: Deathworlder Relaxation Activities

They had heard humans liked to camp outside from time to time to relax and enjoy themselves. There was no scientific research for it, they had good homes to live in, but humans, as they said to some of their companions, just liked to "rough it" from time to time. So, the havenworlders invited a group of humans to show them how to "rough it" on their world. By human standards, this world was an incredible paradise. To the havenworlders, the night

Challenge #02485-F295: Something She Ate?

A: I didn’t know that humans spit acids

H: uhg we usually don’t, I think I ate something toxic

A: I see so the acid is used to neutralize the toxins

H: it really isn’t. Get back I’m gonna blow another chunk -- Anon Guest

[Offensensitivity warning: descriptions of regurgitation]

The Human digestive system is a mass of toxic substances in valved tubes. -- Gryxnu's Comparative Anatomy, 236 GalStand years before Human Admission into the Galactic Alliance.

221

Challenge #02480-F290: Considering Invasion?

In the past, Nordic Human warriors in the midst of battle would enter into a “berserker state” where many of the brain limiters would turn off and force the body into using 100% of it strength to pummel the enemy into submission or death. Of course, this severely injure the body afterward, since the limiters were there to keep the muscles from ripping themselves apart and disrupting the organs, or from erupting. Also due to the adrenaline rush and rush of endorphins,

Challenge #02476-F286: Lawless Lands

A deathworlder and a heavenworlder talk about a City/asteroid/planet, choose the size you want :D

-It's a place with no rules

-You always need rules

-Not this place, it's called "Kowloon" because it's based off a human city that had the same name. It was more dense than any other urban area on the face of terra... and it was ungoverned

-.... and conflicts between them ?

-Human gangs of criminals (triads) were resolving civil conflicts, creating a volunteer fire brigade,

Challenge #02472-F282: GG Tho

Paintball, Nerf, Air Soft, fighting competitions, obstacle courses, ect., are all games where humans play at war. It was something their children even played, preparing them to be warriors in the future, no matter their adult occupations. They had plenty of competitions to show their strength, their prowess, their aggression, and their ability to take down an enemy. Often other humans. Some Vorax have the guts to challenge some humans to a game, wanting to prove to their leaders that humans are

Challenge #02460-F270: Like Humans Do

"Don't worry I based this defence system off a deathworlder immune system"

As I ask in a shaken voice, "What kind?"

It bares its teeth, that I later I learned it was a sign of affection. "Humans"

(A quick lesson to the immune system https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQGOcOUBi6s) -- Anon Guest

The thing about Deathworlder immune systems, is that they evolved to deal with Deathworlder problems. As such, they could be viewed as needlessly complicated. They could also be

Challenge #02456-F266: The Tough Nut

"I would like to acquaint your facial features, with the fundamentals of a brick wall, at high velocity, REPEATEDLY." -- Anon Guest

"Thrown or wielded?" challenged the Human.

This was not the expected reaction to a threat. K'rux startled for a second or two. "You are meant to be intimidated by my bulk and violence," they protested. "That will make you go away."

The Human raised one of their furry eyebrows. "You're new, aren't you? Haven't had the entire introduction to the

Challenge #02454-F264: You're in Trouble Now

Newscast Breaking news!

Successful but peaceful Human colony world "Nirvana" a category 2.5 Deathworld, gifted to the humans for their contributions during the Acridith Incursion, has been attacked via Orbital Bombardment. Casualties are expected to be to be in the in the 10's of thousands, with the Injured numbering in the Millions.

The Vorax Empire has immediately distanced themselves from the atrocity and ,in a once unfathomable move, has offered aid, condemning the unknown aggressors for attempting to destabilise the most

Challenge #02451-F261: Which War Game

"So you're telling me... that you have an actual WAR GAME!!" -- Anon Guest

The Humans had been playing Symbolically Kill Your Friends with something called Water Guns. Traxx, watching the mayhem, was rather puzzled, and asked the obvious question: "This is a game of hunting, or a game of war?"

Human Deb answered, "Oh we have loads of games of war." Then they casually shot their ally across the hall.

Which lead to the next question: "How much number is 'loads'?

Challenge #02450-F260: Proof Positive

Don't mind me, I’m just listening to “back in black” with Tesla coils -- Anon Guest

For those who need proof that Humans, a class four point five Deathworld species, are the indomitable space orcs everyone says they are, look no further than the Zeusaphone.

Humanity harnessed the electron. Harnessed electromagnetic radiation. They used both to make music. They used it to create artificial lightning. Then they noticed that the lightning could make music-like sounds. The faraday cage, always boon to

Challenge #02449-F259: Weapons of Mass Amusement

it was all fun and games until humans found medieval style energy weapons -- Anon Guest

"So this is like an electric ballista?" had never before been words of impending doom, but these were Humans who were doing the talking. "The spearpoint is a trigger for a giant capacitor, right? Delivering a blast of excess electrons to the target."

"Er. Yes," said Museum Director Gorx, who was starting to believe this tour had been a mistake[1]. "The use of this weapons

Challenge #02444-F254: Wilful Air Adulteration

They were out on a scientific survey of a new planet and pirates were on their tail. They knew they had at least two hours before they were caught and their ship had little by way of weaponry. They made their ship's human his favorite, but usually forbidden unless they were planet-side where there was lots of fresh air, meal. Hot dogs and BEANS! As he smiled, thanked them, and dug in to his meal, the gas masks were being handed out.

Challenge #02436-F246: A Concerning Countdown

I am a big fan of your "Humans are Space Orcs" Series, I read them every chance I can get. I would love to see this one for one of your stories. A deathworlder, a human, has been living with a Havenworlder as his bodyguard for quite some time. He is a scientist and was working with ways to extend a Human's lifespan and she has always been willing to volunteer for his work. Even when she was warned it might hurt.

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A 307-post collection

Challenge #02505-F315: Useful in a Pinch

Challenge #02500-F310: Bear's Big Story

Challenge #02488-F298: Deathworlder Relaxation Activities

Challenge #02485-F295: Something She Ate?

Challenge #02480-F290: Considering Invasion?

Challenge #02476-F286: Lawless Lands

Challenge #02472-F282: GG Tho

Challenge #02460-F270: Like Humans Do

Challenge #02456-F266: The Tough Nut

Challenge #02454-F264: You're in Trouble Now

Challenge #02451-F261: Which War Game

Challenge #02450-F260: Proof Positive

Challenge #02449-F259: Weapons of Mass Amusement

Challenge #02444-F254: Wilful Air Adulteration

Challenge #02436-F246: A Concerning Countdown