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Gnu Terry Pratchett

A 28-post collection

Challenge #02069-E245: And in This Labyrinth

[All libraries are connected, including bookshelves in homes. This is why book lovers like to keep their books in darker and quiet places. They know that not all Travelers can handle light.] -- Anon Guest

There is an ancient chain of logic that leads to the inevitable. Knowledge is power. To know is to have an advantage, yes, but there is more than one form of power... Power can become mass. Play around with Einstein's famous equation and one can convert energy into matter. Mass creates gravity. This one is simple. Enough mass, and an object will pull in other things. Gravity bends spacetime.

This is why it's dangerous to go wandering unguided in the seemingly endless halls of the Archivaas. They have converted every scrap of possessable knowledge into assorted preservation formats and gathered it in one place. Those who insist on print formats live in labyrinths with addresses in the Dewey Decimal system. To fifteen places.

Absolute power may corrupt, but absolute knowledge is impossible. The Archivaas try, nevertheless. This young Archivaas has encountered a problem she's just learned about. There was an Ape in the stacks. A rather large Orang-utan. Knuckling his way peacefully between the shelves. He said, "Ook," but she somehow heard, I'm looking for a very good advice book on why it's a bad idea to do your own home maintenance.

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Challenge #02062-E238: Magical Progress Goes Twinkle

Unseen University's Hex nails the math for reliable translocation -- Anon Guest

Magic has rules. This is a fact as real as the turtle that swims underneath the world. Or the four elephants on its back that support the entire disk. In order to fly, one must drop an equal weight and really know how to stick the landing. Magic can turn lead into gold, but that gold will make you sick if you hang on to it for too long. For

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Challenge #01912-E088: Just a Wee Dram Ye Ken

It's St Patrick's Day, Irish Pub - Feegles. (AKA the Wee Free Men, of Sir Terry's Discworld.) -- Anon Guest

Up the airy mountain,
Down the rushy glen,
We daren’t go a-hunting
For fear of little men; -- William Allingham, The Fairies

Britain has an Agency for everything. National Health, Child Welfare, Disability Assistance, you name it, they have it. They're also the home headquarters of UNIT and WHO, the United Nations International Taskforce and the Weird Happenings Organisation, respectively. And

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Challenge #01908-E084: Pearls and Male Chauvinist...

Reading Sir Terry Prachett's works and having it just passed of as 'light reading' at University. -- Anon Guest

She opened the book to read it and relax while she had her lunch and a coffee. Unfortunately, it was also dudebro o'clock, and a man-child had to come and comment on her material.

"You're reading that? I thought you were intelligent..."

Sue put the book by Sir Pterry down and glared at him. She had never met this man before, didn't know

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Challenge #01812-D351: GNU Terry Pratchett

The four lesser horsemen of Panic, Bewilderment, Ignorance and Shouting took control of the room. -- Knitnan

There's a reason why lesser horsemen are lesser horsemen. They can't help but be what they are. Panic is a whirlwind of anxiety. Bewilderment can't find their own arse with an atlas. Ignorance says all the things your racist in-law does that just make you want to burn and die from the shame. Shouting is almost a relief, because all they are is LOUD.

And

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Challenge #01310-C215: The Opposite of Magic

But they just ran into the world’s best spell mangler. She has the protection of a unicorn. She carries what is probably a fully intelligent sword that can do whatever needs doing to bring justice to a situation. And she is the host of a living magical spell that likes to do things to people who try and mess with it. -- RecklessPrudence

There is magic, everyone knows this. People with the ability to wield it range from those who have

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Challenge #01112-C015: Performance Piece

A scrap of data is recovered. Death's Belief Speech, from Hogfather. Doesn't matter if it's the book or the movie.

For those who haven't read it, a clip from the movie is here.

Not as anything unique to humanity, but rather as a comment on Sophonts as a whole, from a human who would have very much liked to meet the rest of the universe. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: I would also love to meet the rest of the universe, but I have

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Challenge #01099-C002: Sample Curse

"Oh! It's easy to get Feegles out of a pub. You just have to know how." -- Knitnan

"And how, pray tell," said the beleaguered barman, "does one get Feegles out of a pub?"

Tiffany Aching cleared her throat and climbed up to stand on the bar. ""Some schemie at the standin' stones is lookin' fer a tussle!"

The barman joined her on her perch as the Feegles stampeded out of the bar and towards the standing stones. The very distant standing

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Challenge #01046-B314: "Surprise" Party

Nanny Ogg throws Granny Weatherwax a surprise 70th birthday party at the Lancre pub. -- Anon Guest

Birthdays are generally a special occasion. Witch's birthdays doubly so. Not many of them prefer to make their age known, lest the C-word inevitably slip from someone's mouth.

Gytha had done her best. She'd set up in a place where Esme Weatherwax never went if she could prevent it. The local pub. She'd laid on every treat she could, including the mandatory ham bun; because,

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Challenge #01009-B277: What's Nice About Prophecies?

Prophecy Wreckers, Local 182 -- RecklessPrudence

"See this?" The union Chief waved a battered tome. "This is why prophecies are vaguely-worded and open to interpretation. These 'nice and accurate' prophecies are going to be the end of us!"

The Chair opened it at random. The first prophecy her finger fell on read, "Ygnorre thif ye daft olde fool. Thif if being myne gift to myne defendantf."

"Er," said a fellow member, reading over the Chair's shoulder. "I think she knew about us.

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lesyablackbirdink:I can't draw anything emotional right now. I don't have the words to express how much these books mean to me. They have...

lesyablackbirdink:

I can’t draw anything emotional right now. I don’t have the words to express how much these books mean to me.
They have been a part of my life, everyday. Not a day would go by when I would not think of some part Terry Pratchett had written. Funny, smart, wise, sad, thoughtful.
I would quote his words in daily conversations. He had a way of expressing key things, important things very simply. It was perfect.
And that was

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npr:nprbooks:Ever since Terry Pratchett died last week, I've been having variants of the same conversation with my friends and family --...

npr:

nprbooks:

Ever since Terry Pratchett died last week, I’ve been having variants of the same conversation with my friends and family — WHERE to start reading when there are so so so many books?

Everyone has their own strongly held opinions, as our pal Tasha Robinson lays out in this thoughtful essay.  Me personally, I say as long as you don’t begin at the beginning, you’ll be fine. (I’m sure there are people out there who like The

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Challenge #00893-B162: Perish the Thought

(Was trying to find the post that inspired this, but couldn’t)
Considering that literature professors, English teachers, and mandatory readings have managed to make Shakespeare boring, even with the subject material, jokes, innuendo, memorable insults everywhere, and masterful handling of it all, imagine the travesty that will be lessons on Discworld in a few centuries.

Time’s winged chariot… renders all things boring.

They were
doing the Pratchett section of English Lit, which was only slightly less
dull than the Victorian

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