Dear Diary

A 3685-post collection

Smooth mornings!

Hooray, I have life figured out enough that the mornings move like a well-oiled machine. Now, if only I could do the same thing for myself.

Alone, I clog up with fascinating things until a half-hour task takes most of the firkin day. And then I complain about having zero time to fart around and play games.

Sometimes, I am a complete dummins.

But I have learned a few things from some of it. Including a new word that I plan to breathe new life into: Quizzaciously. From this video. And it means 'to speak in a mocking manner'.

So now, instead of writing something like:

"My name's Hwell," mocked Ax'and'l in sotto voice, "I like women and I have the self-preservation skills of a diseased whelk..."

It can now read like:

"My name's Hwell," muttered Ax'and'l quizzaciously, "I like women and I have the self-preservation skills of a diseased whelk..."

And I plan on sneaking it in every chance I get. It's a deliciously chewy word and almost full of buttery goodness.

Of course, it won't be appearing in Beauties and the Beastly since I just learned its existence and I'm not ploughing through 115+K words to look for a good excuse. I have beta-readers for that.

You're welcome. This is what happens when you spend a majority of the next book getting back to me with a 'nothing wrong with all that' review. You know exactly who I'm talking about, friendo.

This weekend, all going well, I will round up Beloved and finally get One Leap Year of Instants (2016) up on Smashwords so that loads of people can download a sample, about fifty can pay $0 for the whole thing, and a rare, treasured few will pay some actual money for. My shopping budget thanks you valued and rare few. And so do I. You are blessed beings. May synchronicity follow all your intentions to a happy conclusion.

It's nearing the very end of February, and I still haven't heard back from the last set of agents I threw Kung Fu Zombies at. I really hope that they're not waiting for the deadline to reject me. That would be especially devastating.

But in expecting failure, am I prepared for success?

I'll probably be hiding in a pillow fort and eating Ben&Jerry's regardless. And using up an entire box of tissues. And -if successful- feeling like a massive impostor because Kung Fu Zombies is a statistical outlier and should not be chosen to represent my greater body of work.

Anxiety is such fun, ze said quizzaciously.

Some terrifying things I learned

Thanks to my friend, RecklessPrudence, I've learned that, though autism is older than we think it is, how autistes were treated hasn't really changed so much.

An autistic child before the true rise of the Industrial age would be called a "Changeling". And, despite the entire "be kind to the fae" mind-set, a Changeling child would be horrendously mistreated until the Fae gave the 'proper' child back.

This included beatings, being held to hot items, and tying them to a chair and

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Exercising again

We went on the first walk for a fortnight, and I was just about wiped out from a walk around the block. I'm gonna regret the sprint session this afternoon.

But at least we have some stew in the slow cooker, so I don't need to fret about food.

Still no rejection letter, just yet. And I have a fluttering underneath my sternum and panic-related asthma. Hooray. Anxiety firkin sucks!

So I took a Seretide this morning to try and live normally,

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Whooopsy

We went to the movies, yesterday. And picked up a whole lot of sugar-free lollies. And made the mistake of eating huge amounts of them.

Commercially-available artificial sweeteners are usually the kind that have the side-effect of loosening your stool.

You can guess that some of us had a very interesting night.

Mayhem is going to have a very interesting day, too, because I just discovered some outright fraud on his behalf. I had told him to fold and sort, and it

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So much for that

We didn't get to exercise, yesterday. I'm going to have to badger Beloved to go for a walk come Monday. No excuses, no BS. We both have to get back on track.

The good news is that I'm still losing weight. Just... a lot slower and a lot more randomly.

The bad news is that I am still asthmatic. I needed to use Max, this morning, for a saline dose. My lungs were a little clogged, and it hurt to breathe in.

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Recruiting

I've hired new cleaners to help out with keeping the house in good nick. Yay me. And while I was working with them, the discussion meandered into diet and who's eating what. Which was an excellent opportunity to glance on LCHF and Keto.

And I also showed them Overdrive by Steam Powered Giraffe. Because they're awesome.

Turns out we're all nerds, so we can gas about our favourite nerdy stuff whilst also setting the house to order. Bonus.

And on top of

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Gaulish Swears...

So my previous queueing system decided to die. Without warning. And now I'm back to putting them in five minutes apart. Like a doof.

I hurt my wrists by doing all my creative projects, yesterday. I have learned, again, the perils of writing too much, too fast.

Any never to give my wrists a breather, I am using speech to text. It is, as always, very entertaining. Especially for anybody in peanut gallery.

Beloved saw my ranting, and though we haven't talked

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AUGH (again)

New job, new rules. On one hand, Beloved is no longer in Cubicle Hell working 9-5. On the other hand, Beloved now seems determined to work 24/7.

When I went to bed, Beloved was working on some program, as they had been all evening. The hot, fresh, yummy food I had made for them had gone stone cold.

When I got up in the morning, Beloved was still working on some program. They had eaten maybe three bites of the dinner

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Swing and a miss

Just when I get into the swing of things, the pendulum shifts and everything goes agley all over again.

Beloved is taking off in the early-early morning, before I can even badger the kids into getting their lunchboxes together. Which means no morning exercises. Which means finding a time in the afternoon to go do it.

Which hasn't happened, so far.

Tomorrow evening, we should be walking around the blocks, again. Starting with the long block and, if we can, going around

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Cue "Yakety Sax"

That's "The Benny Hill Theme" to many of you dear readers. Ideal music for running about like a chook after a chook with a curly grub.

So this was yesterday:

  • Get Chaos ready for her psych visit
  • Forget to urge Mayhem into motion
  • See Beloved off to work
  • Prepare for a long-arse trip there and back again
  • Just as it's time to go, realise that Mayhem fell asleep instead of getting ready and have an emotional blowout
  • Drive Mayhem to school
  • Realise
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AUGH!

Our dryer is officially dead on a day when we need it the most, what with the sky deciding that today is a lovely day to frell up my plans to actually slot in some firkin laundry before the day really gets hot.

For the record, it's already 25C (78F) at half-past six in the morning, and humid with it. Bleh. And it only promises to get hotter and muggier throughout the remains of the day.

This is the sort of weather

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Schedule changes

My love has new employment. Which will include new hours, apparently. I'm already laying bets as to whether they will hold. But Beloved swears that they will keep hours between 7:30AM and 3:30PM. Which means our morning physical jerks will transform into afternoon exercises and probably gassing about a great many things.

I'm looking forward to exercising again.

I'm also browsing the news and it looks like there might be a National Women's Strike in protest against the 27% pay

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Vital statistics

This Saturday Statistics is marred by the fact that we've run out of some of our blood sticks. So all my blood levels are "no data" until we get more of them. Bonus - I don't have to stick my finger with a sharp object for a little while.

And after that tiniest of small mercies, from last week:

Weight: 78.5 kg
Fat weight: 32.8 kg
Waist/Height: 0.529
Blood Sugar: no data
Blood Ketones: no data
Breath Ketones:

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All's well

I did an IPC meeting at Chaos' school today and she is having zero problems with class. I may have also volunteered to help with the English part of the curriculum.

And I'll be talking to a class where some of the kids don't even want to write a sentence. Mind you, the sentence starters are kind of dull and nobody likes sentences like that.

But the way to start a story is with a good sentence. I need to go gather

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Getting into the swing of it

It's taken us a few weeks, but we're getting there. Even with the recent gastric distress, there's a rhythm to things.

Get up, ablute, take my weight - I'm still below 80 kilos despite bouncing back from the bug. Rouse the kids, get dressed, chase my little darlings into getting ready for the day. Chaos packs a three course meal, Mayhem packs a boiled egg or two. Make sure they're both groomed, and then try and get Beloved going for the day.

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