Amalgam Universe

Challenge #02126-E297: Uncommon Ground

"You're 'Clancy of the' where was it again?"

"The Overflow."

"You're a laundryman?" -- Anon Guest

Human Daz spared a dubious glance towards Rilthi Baz and wondered, not for the first time, if she was being very gently wound up. "Uhm," she said. "What?"

Clancy just sighed. "Yeah... an 'overflow' is an area where the flood waters tend to overflow. When the river floods, that's where the excess water goes. Good for grasslands and grazing."

"Also rice," added Human Daz. "I'm guessing your mum was a big fan of ole Banjo?"

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Challenge #02123-E294: I Can't See My House From Here

A combined research team of a number of species of the galaxy invents a device that is capable of accelerating any object to significant portions of C, the human member of the team proceeds to be a human. -- Anon Guest

The breakthrough came, as breakthroughs often do, by accident. One person noticed that the interference on their experimental quantum computer was too regular to be just interference. The paired electrons weren't merely paired. They were grouped. They were grouped with other

Challenge #02116-E293: Lest Ye Be Judged...

we poisoned our air and water to weed out the weak.

we set off fission weapons in our own biosphere.

we nailed our GOD to a stick.

humans are the monsters that monsters fear.

the demons lurking in the void. -- Anon Guest

Offensensitivity warning: Deathworlder studies, Human content.

Planet Terra, aka Earth. Origin point of the species who call themselves Human. Though a class 4.5 Death World, the intelligent life from there rates a 5. Here, we will examine the

Challenge #02114-E291: Unlikely Friendship on Courier Fifty-eight

Ship's human and the Anti Gravity Drive keep company. -- Anon Guest

[AN: It's the Gravity Drive, but I get it]

This drive was one of the loners. It did not need constant Nae'hyn attention to do its work. It knew the route better than the Captain. It got family visits, of course, but Human Gar kind'a felt in kindred with it. Human Gar had took this particular mail route because it met her needs for social contact - otherwise known as

Challenge #02113-E290: Simple Communication

"I said no!"

"You said yeah!"

"Are you insane? I said yeah, nah! That means NO!!" -- Anon Guest

"Are you insane?" asked Gork. "That is not a clear means of communicating a positive or a negative."

Human Baz glared down at the little alien in her care. "It's perfectly understandable to everybody," she said.

Gork flinched at yet another explosion. "Not to this somebody," he said. "We look for affirmation or negation first. We do not wait for further elucidation."

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Challenge #02110-E287: Dealing in All Directions

"Ooh, look! Shiny!" -- OohLookShiny

Priff reached out to restrain the Human before ze even turned to look, saying, "Human Will. No." The main problem with Human Will was that they so very often lived up to their name. Whatever a Human should not do, that Human will.

"But it's so shiny," protested Human Will.

"Yes, it is shiny," agreed Priff, urging Human Will further away from the glittering display. "It is also expensive and very likely to be fragile. Do you

Challenge #02109-E286: Meat-ing Place

The Galactic community knows that the human race is omnivorous and that they sometimes prefer meat when stranded or when supplies are low, willingly giving up one dietary options to any remaining crew in order to save them. It was a smart evolutionary path that many alien scholars believed was essential for surviving such a deadly world like Terra.

But no one could have foreseen how much the human race could love meat. Covet it. And fight for it so strongly that

Challenge #02107-E284: Picking Sides

“You’re fired from the War. In fact, you’re entire adrenaline-crazy species is fired from the War!”

“Umm... I don’t think that’s how that works.” -- Anon Guest

"Breach of contract," howled Admiral Nagisok. "I've been criminally mislead. You were supposed to excel at war."

"Yeah, we do," said Human Sam.

"LIES!" Nagisok pointed out to the battle map, where thousands of points of light were blinking on and off. "You've made this war far worse than it ever

Challenge #02105-E282: Iconography

Scholars of the Galactic Alliance study ancient human gods; the likes of Apollo, Coyote, Mr. Rogers, Bob Ross, and Ronald McDonald. -- shkspr1048

"The changing roles of icons in culture is a fascinating process. Take this fellow," a picture of Apollo. "A figure from ancient Terran culture. He has been, at various times, the God of music, truth, prophecy, the sun, light, plague, and poetry. The Greeks and the Romans alike got things confused for a while, of course. After he faded

Challenge #02104-E281: Miscommunication Malfunction

Human: "Now you're thinking like a human!"

Alien: Internally screaming -- Anon Guest

"No. I didn't-- I'm not-- I don't-- That was sarcasm, Human Jae..."

Human Jae looked briefly alarmed, "And that was a joke, Joyse. I was kidding."

Joyse breathed again. "Good. The last thing I want is to discover that Human Insanity is contagious. Please keep your joking to a minimum in this endeavour, thank you."

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Challenge #02104-E280: Personal Augmentation Options

Humans introduce aliens to cosmetics, not all would go in their original place. -- Knitnan

Humans are well known to be attracted to shiny things. This eventually resulted in Humans making themselves shiny in order to attract mates. Jewellery is an almost universal concept, though not always universal in execution. Makeup, on the other hand, is not as universal as one might expect.

"So... you apply paint to your exterior to look more attractive?"

"Getting closer," said Human Jaz. "We call it

Challenge #02102-E278: Faint Praise

"Now look, you 'orrible little bastard, this is the last time I'm going to tell you: no more low gravity rugby in the cargo holds!" -- Anon Guest

"It's not like there's a lot of room to play it anywhere else," protested Human Dave.

"That," said Freighter Captain Jokk, "is not the problem, here. The problem here is you destabilizing my cargo hold with your horseplay."

"How can it be unstable? It's nul-grav. There's no balance to be had in zero gee.

Challenge #02101-E277: Not Dead Yet

humans are hypersensitive to the smell of fresh water, hence why we can smell storms coming. It's so sensitive that we can smell water better than most dogs -- Anon Guest

The Human origin world, Earth to some, Terra to most, has a surface that is over seventy percent water. Thus, it is surprising to most that Humans can detect it. With land in such relative scarcity, most Galactic Citizens assume that finding good soil would be a better priority.

It's a

Challenge #02099-E275: Important Criteria

"Ok guys, for this little crisis I'll need [huge lion-like deathworlder] and [humanoid havenworlder] to stay back and help Sgt Jeanne taking care of the child escapee that we saved from those abductors, while I and the other help remind our "friends" why it's a bad idea to try to eat other's children."

"But... I'm a warrior !"

"First, it will be indoor combat in a really humid space, that's not your forte. Second, if some of them escape us and reach the

Challenge #02096-E272: Empty Perfection

A group of colonists find an abandoned city, complete with canals, solar power, etc, with only one problem -- no people -- Anon Guest

The team Human had baulked before they entered the city limits. Just looking at the city had made Human Rese go back for their highest grade livesuit. Humans had an over-the-horizon radar for trouble, so the rest of the team -ha- followed suit. Progress into the actual city was slow and careful. Passive scans only. Checking every path

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A 2284-post collection

Challenge #02126-E297: Uncommon Ground

Challenge #02123-E294: I Can't See My House From Here

Challenge #02116-E293: Lest Ye Be Judged...

Challenge #02114-E291: Unlikely Friendship on Courier Fifty-eight

Challenge #02113-E290: Simple Communication

Challenge #02110-E287: Dealing in All Directions

Challenge #02109-E286: Meat-ing Place

Challenge #02107-E284: Picking Sides

Challenge #02105-E282: Iconography

Challenge #02104-E281: Miscommunication Malfunction

Challenge #02104-E280: Personal Augmentation Options

Challenge #02102-E278: Faint Praise

Challenge #02101-E277: Not Dead Yet

Challenge #02099-E275: Important Criteria

Challenge #02096-E272: Empty Perfection