Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #01314-C219: The Long Days

These things are sent to try us and they certainly do. -- Anon Guest

All of the longest days start in the wee small hours. Haven't you noticed? They begin with the nightmare. The terrors. The loud neighbour who accidentally or on purpose blasts five seconds of noise into the air. Or the telemarketer who calls without realising the time where you live. Or the obnoxious party relative who drunk-dials you for no real reason, or under the mistaken assumption that your home is a pizza place.

Regardless, sleep is now unattainable and you attempt to do some quiet work to at least get it out of your way. Except there is some base demon in charge of making certain that nothing quiet works properly in the wee small hours. Or it finds a reason to make noise and you have to scramble to stop it before anyone else wakes up.

Even the smallest noise is magnified at four in the morning.

And heaven help you should you decide to work on a computer in those witching hours. Updates and virus checks will happen, and fail, and need authorisation, and endless reboots just to get you back to where you began.

Then, as the rest of the house wakes at the appointed hour... Chaos! The curse that you brought on before dawn catches to everyone you know and love. The combined minor horsemen of absentmindedness, clumsiness, distraction, and mislaying all work together to ensure that absolutely everything is obeying one law - Murphy's.

This is a day for minor disasters. For the little things to drag you down. For your pantry to run out of favourites. For your account to run out of spare cash. For everyone to need a new pair of shoes. For your medication to need replacing.

It is a day for a thousand errands on no coffee. It is a day of traffic jams and road works. It is a day for everyone to run out of things just as you attempt to get them.

And it is a night of burned dinners and expired pizza coupons, of more vital expense than can easily be afforded. Of arguments and screaming matches and a disaster from too far away that makes an early night impossible despite your exhaustion from the day.

Survival in that forge of exasperation is never easy. It is possible, and draining, and it makes you wonder if life is worth living. But it does throw all the better days into sharp and amazing contrast.

(Muse food remaining: 23. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

Weekends, Hooray!

I love weekends. They give me a chance to fart around and do nothing much.

Since I spend my Fridays doing 1K, it means that Saturday and Sunday are both days to laze around and faff about. Both are important parts of the writing cycle. Both lead to excessive amounts of daydreaming which lead to more fiction! Yay!

In my case, it means fiction that I don't have to write, which you will get to see over on my baby forum whenever

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Challenge #01313-C218: No, You Got it Wrong

This is a quote from a Robert Heinlein story. "Always have your pants, your shoes, and your gun where you can find them in the dark." -- Anon Guest

[AN: I fixed your typos, Nonny]

The patient came in with a limb injury. Relatively harmless, but perplexing in the entry and exit trajectory. What added further confusion was the fact that they had a side-arm tangled in their toes, and a white-knuckled grip on one of their boots.

There was some evidence

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Wiki Walks and how they fuel me

For those who've never been on one, a Wiki Walk is where you look up one topic [for example, on wikipedia] and follow interesting areas down a rabbit-hole. Only to emerge somewhere around Real Ghost Stories or Cryptids Near Me wondering how the hell you got there from where you started.

Today's Wiki walk started with Extra Credit - which covers a lot of interesting things, including various languages you can tell a story to an audience in, and I'm not talking

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Challenge #01312-C217: Unsuitable Revival

"What's a Fairy Floss machine? Is it some kind of weapon of mass destruction?

"You probably call it Cotton Candy."

"Nope! Never heard of it."

"Look I'll show you how it works."

10 minutes and 300plus small children later.

"You know, it just might be a weapon of mass destruction." -- Anon Guest

There are phrases of doom. "Hey watch this," coming from a human, is a sure sign that something impressively dangerous is about to happen. Shayde has hundreds of them,

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I'm running contest

I'm pretty darn close to having 300 followers who aren't porn blogs, so I'm doing a thank you give-away of both books and hand-made earrings. Follow the link for all details.

So not only do you have a chance of winning some excellent writing but also some of my hand-made jewelry featured in the original post. Get to it, dear readers!

In other news, I have recently heard that my stories are excellent cures for at least one relative's insomnia. Thanks. I

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Challenge #01311-C216: Relative Insanity

"Maybe you should consider it. Who knows, you might even have...” [Person] stopped and whispered conspiratorially, “fun!"

"That's not a word, I'd have heard of it," was their flat reply. They held a straight face just long enough for [Person] to look horrified before they laughed. -- RecklessPrudence

Of all the fearsome forces in the universe, none is more terrifying than these two words issuing forth from a human mouth, "I'm bored."

Rael hadn't even known that he could get shivers up

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Well that sure worked

It was census night last night. Fortunately, in an effort to go paperless, the Aussie Government decided to allow the citizens to fill out all the census information online.

UNfortunately, this was a massive cock-up because the people running this country have no idea what happens when about twenty-three million people attempt to log into the same URL at once. They could have looked up "DOS attack" before they started. Really.

Also unfortunately, lots of the old-fashioned paper forms have been lost

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Challenge #01310-C215: The Opposite of Magic

But they just ran into the world’s best spell mangler. She has the protection of a unicorn. She carries what is probably a fully intelligent sword that can do whatever needs doing to bring justice to a situation. And she is the host of a living magical spell that likes to do things to people who try and mess with it. -- RecklessPrudence

There is magic, everyone knows this. People with the ability to wield it range from those who have

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Self-maintenance is not "work"

I've come to the realisation that I class my self-maintenance regimes as "work". As in, I tend not to do them when I'm having a relax day.

This is bad.

I need to maintain myself because the backslide takes a lot of time to recover from. And it's happening faster and steeper as I get older.

I also need to keep in contact with MeMum because Time is a bastard. I am a scatterbrained doodle and this week makes it worse.

Ugh.

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Challenge #01309-C214: I am Immortal, You're Not

Oh my god wonder of wonders an ancient semi-immortal race understands that time is valuable. -- RecklessPrudence

Immortals have some odd habits. One that stands out is spending hundreds of years on perfecting Apple Pie. Right down to breeding the perfect apple, the right kind of bees, and just the right kind of grain.

Currently, Duroc the Everlasting was analysing the maple sap for the correct kind of sweetness.

Heaven help the world when she finally decided to work on the ice

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Ekka Monday! Yay

Welcome, one and all, to the most frelled-up school week in Queensland. Because of the Royal National Agricultural exhibition, everyone has Wednesday off, and various school children in various districts get an extra day of the week off of school.

If that extra day happens on a Monday, then you get an awful lot of sickies being thrown on the following Tuesday. Or, as we like to call it, "the super long weekend". Similar things happen to the Thursday if the day

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Challenge #01308-C213: Modern Fable

Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. -- RecklessPrudence

Sacrifice is noble. There is no doubt. Those who turn aside their wants for the needs of others are truly glorious. They have honour. They gain kharma points. And some gain respect.

Most, however, are expected to sacrifice more.

The fable is told of those who sacrifice everything. The Giving Tree is just one. There is another... the Perfect Mother.

She gave up her employment so she could give her children

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Things that make my day

Nothing much happened yesterday, and nothing much is planned for today. So instead of complaining about that, or revelling in it... have a list of things that cheer me up in no particular order.

  • Really good chocolate
  • Hot bubble-baths
  • Snuggle time with Beloved
  • Actually catching an SPG art stream while I'm awake
  • Making a quality pun and watching everyone else slowly collapse from the pain
  • Steam Powered Giraffe in general
  • Steam Powered Giraffe in person [Ultra-rare!]
  • No-brand cheap-as-F tea with 3 sugars
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Challenge #01307-C212: Re-forming Content

Someone who just 'removed' the tyrant, and has put their non-evil child in charge, after confronting them with the fact that the parent they loved was a tyrannical dictator sacrificing their people for their own vainglory: "My condolences on your coronation. You're welcome." -- RecklessPrudence

Queen Kindness the First had loved her father. Her days revolved around the hours that he came to her suites and played with her, or read to her, or listened while she talked and they strolled through

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