Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Iris and Peter Get Married (Eventually) [pt 4]

Chapter Four.
(Neutral territory, The Admiral’s survivors, The Admiral’s victims, and Dinner happens once a day)

Peter carried her all the way to the library. One of the demilitarised zones in the perpetual battle between himself and the old man. Laid her carefully on one of the couches there and, with a thought to her sense of decency, covered her stockinged legs with a throw his late mother had made.

Poor Ma. The doctors said she perished from hysterical melancholy. Peter was rather more inclined to diagnose that his old man had worn her entirely out with his bullying. He'd bullied her into marriage, bullied her into having children too soon and too quickly together. And then he'd bullied her to an early grave.

In his less charitable moments, Peter rather fancied that Ma had died as a means of finally escaping him. As had all of his brothers and all but one of his sisters. And dear Penelope was very rarely spoken of since Father shipped her off to a permanent hospice. Infantile paralysis had taken the use of her legs from her, which rendered her useless as far as the Admiral was concerned.

Penelope was safe and far away. Living what life she could whilst stuck in a wheeled chair.

The maid did not flutter, nor moan slightly as ladies were meant to do as they stirred from a faint. Her eyes flew open, she gasped, and shrank away from him.

He did a little shrinking himself. "It's all right, now," he soothed. "The Admiral never comes into the library. I've conspired to gradually replace all his false books with more genuine volumes. Hasn't noticed a thing." He tried an encouraging smile for her.

It didn't take. The new maid just shrank in her place and looked for a means of escape.

Peter wisely gave her space and murmured, "I'm not my father, Miss."

She threw off the cover and bolted for safety. Of course she did. She'd heard everything the Admiral his father had said. Both men of the house were now threats in her eyes. And even though she was only halfway right, he had no welcome means of convincing her of such.

If he continued to come down to dine with the Admiral, all the maids would be forced to hear the same thing. Over and over. With little in the way of variation. But Mrs Cambridge did insist that he eat at least one proper meal a day. Another cyclical argument that he'd given up on having.

Mrs Cambridge, after all, had to deal with the Admiral his father several times a day. Dinner only happened once.


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Iris and Peter Get Married (Eventually) [pt 3]

Chapter Three.
(Formal Dinner, The suffragette’s critique, Goods on display, and An insufferable situation)

Dinner was a very stiff affair. Starched collars and cuffs and near-strangling black ties. The Admiral Walter wore it like a second skin, while the young master wore it rather like a straight jacket.

Iris, and a good half-dozen other maids in similarly brief uniforms, stood decoratively around the room. All well within the young master's line of sight. She had managed to find his bedchamber, conspired

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Challenge #01064-B332: The Pros and Cons of Cute

That one ambassador that has at this point given up on avoiding being picked up and cuddled/held/used as a large teddy bear, and just gets on with paperwork (or listens/chats/relaxes/reads a book/takes a nap) while their fur/scales/feathers are groomed by whoever got them this time, so long as they don't have any appointments to get to. -- Gallifreya

[Re-using Ambassador Ha'ri from story #00761, available for purchase in the next Instants Anthology (coming soon)

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It's raining on Christmas Eve

And since I spent my formative years in the country and living on tank water, I have only one response to rain on Christmas Eve:

YES!

I hope it stays, today. I hope it stays tomorrow. I hope it stays for Boxing Day, when a majority of the post-festivity mess is getting cleaned up.

We need a nice, gentle, cooling rain in the very middle of summer. We need it like air. A nice, set-in rain would make this Christmas perfect.

Because

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Iris and Peter Get Married (Eventually) [pt 2]

Chapter Two.
(Miss Iris learns the ropes, That which needs fixing, The dreadful sandwich, and The cheeky copper head)

Iris scurried after Mrs Cambridge, skirts held fast in both hands.

"No doubt he's told you not t' do something 'til you're fixed somehow. You can forget about that with me."

"Said I shouldn't talk, m'm. Said me accent needed fixin'."

"Uhuh. Irish. There's those who lord it over any they see as lesser, and our master the Admiral has an entire list

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Challenge #01063-B331: The Ambassador... the Hat

A skeleton looks much less scary with a small child sitting on their shoulders/draped over their skull -- Gallifreya

The monsters had not waited for permission to build. A new city sprang up on and around Mount Ebott. Practically overnight. Replete with paved roads, plumbing, and all the amenities. They certainly did not wait to celebrate their freedom.

And they invited the humans to come join them.

Some came expecting to be scared. Officer Honicutt came to make certain that the

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Fun times ahead

Friendo is super effective at getting me motivated. The majority of an entire arm of the kitchen countertop has been sorted in the space of a few hours, when its daunting expanse of assorted scrattle had intimidated me to the extreme, previously.

I have the hoarder's edition of OCD - which means (a) I never throw anything out (b) I tend to leave things where they lie, and (c) doing anything to fix it requires at least one person to keep me

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Iris and Peter Get Married (Eventually) [pt 1]

Disclaimer: Steam Powered Giraffe belongs to David and Isabella Bennett, Sam Luke, and possibly Steve Negrette. I make no claim on their characters or lore. I only wish to try and do it justice.

Chapter One.
(A new hire, The mis-pronounced Mrs Cambridge, Ominous forebodings, and Perplexing romantic gestures)

Admiral Reginaldfield Chesterpot Walter peered over his desk at the new maid. Most of her hair was demurely wound up in a cap, but a few escaped tendrils declared her to be a

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Challenge #01062-B330: One Miserable Evening in a Wave of the Future Science Outpost

Strange how believing in "the greater good" makes doing "necessary evils" so much more tolerable... -- Anon Guest

[AN: I saw your comment on this, RecklessPrudence. Was this you? If so, I'll re-attribute]

Rael was supposed to be resting in his heated tank. Certainly, his body was resting, but he was not insensate. He could hear the argument going on between his creators and the owners of Wave of the Future. He could not see them, and he didn't particularly want to.

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Reasons to be happy (and also scared)

Life gets me down, sometimes, so I try to make myself focus on the good things. Alas, sometimes that also causes an anxiety flare-up. But at least I'm not sad any more and Steam Powered Giraffe can help me conquer my Fraidy Cats.

Reasons I should be happy:

  • I'm going to start publishing that epic SPG lorefic romance TODAY (corollary, I'm not finished writing it, what if I run out of chapters before I run out of story to tell?)
  • The house
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Challenge #01061-B329: First Impressions

The large, intimidating and scary... King Fluffybuns -- Gallifreya

Authorities were still trying to lure the silent Frisk away from the gathered monsters. Frisk had worn themselves out trying to tell them that the monsters were her friends.

Now they were just clinging to the nearest leg for comfort.

Toriel patted her head. "I know, my child," she soothed. "It is very hard to convince them. Humans do tend to judge by appearances. Have no fear. They will understand."

And then, the

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So much to do, so few spoons

Once again, the family predilection for doing anything else but cleaning has reared its ugly head. I'm going to be off my feet, making sure things are (a) ready for Christmas, (b) ready for my visiting Friendo, (c) going to stay that firkin way at least until Boxing Day.

AND I have the usual run of daily Instant and daily word count [no fears, dear readers, about Christmas happening on a Friday. I will catch up with my word count on the

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Challenge #01060-B328: In the Middle of a Faery Tale

http://paintdripps.tumblr.com/post/133942666585/magic-aus-for-all-your-magic-au-needs

And a third -- Gallifreya

Gloria had been combing her hair by the river when a wandering man stumbled upon her. He stood there, gaping like a landed fish, until Gloria started braiding it up.

"Fair maiden, I beg your boon," he began. "I am labouring under a terrible curse. A foul witch decreed that I must never refuse an opportunity for generosity until such time as a maiden bestows her true love's kiss."

Hm.

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Very much broke again

(Argh) Christmas gift shopping happened. It's a very cheap year, this year. For limited definitions of "cheap". Beloved secured Mayhem's gift at quite some expense, and since we have an "equal worth" policy going on, Chaos may yet have some catching up to do.

We might not be able to do that, this year. Ah well.

And, as previously noted in this blog, all the adults are getting artisinal herb products in a pretty little gift basket, this year. I feel kind

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Challenge #01059-B327: Reset... Reset...

http://paintdripps.tumblr.com/post/133942666585/magic-aus-for-all-your-magic-au-needs

Pick a second -- Gallifreya

Sans had let a fine layer of snow settle on him again. It didn't really matter. Skeletons were generally immune to the cold in the first place, and he just didn't care for the second.

Every time he opened his eyes, he saw the sky... Blue sky. Real stars. Clouds... it didn't matter.

Crowding didn't matter. Not any more. There were seemingly boundless areas of mountainside and forest in which

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