Instant Story

Murphy’s Law, and ensuing resulting chaos thereof.

[AN: You can get some really interesting ones over here: http://www.scottrainey.com/jokes/murphys_laws.htm]

There are rules to space travel. Primary amongst them is: Shut the flakking door. And many of them are cycled upwards or downwards depending on the frequency of use.

But always, somewhere in the top ten is: Never ask questions with an inherently obvious answer.

The
examples of the lawbreakers are numerous. Blex T’iiv once said, “They’re only level three Deathworlders. What can they do to us?” and quickly found out.

R’ixxo the Mighty asked, “How can those squishy things conquer a solar system?” and got a very practical demonstration.

And many humans have had, “It can’t get much worse, can it?” as their epitaph.

And, in retrospect, Trader Ax’and’s should really learn to stop asking, “What else can this human do to make my life more complicated?”

The human had a nervous rictus and both hands cupping his genitals. “Hi,” was the only greeting he had.

“I take it your ‘date’ didn’t go that well.”

“Ah. No. Water-soluable clothing. Water sluice ride. Do I need to spell it out?”

Ax’and’l sighed. “Has a complaint been registered against Ambassador Shayde?”

Sherlock maintained his usual unreadable facade. “Mister Barrow refuses to press charges. He said he deserved it.”

“What did he do to–” Ax’and’l cut himself off. He was learning. “No. No. Never mind. I’m sure I’ll read about it in the news feeds.”

Hwell belched an anxious titter. “Yeah. She kind of made certain there was a lot of press…”

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Keets and a laser pointer.

Problem one: Keets are super-delicate babies and must be protected.

Problem two: Keets are as hyper as all get out in rainy weather.

Problem three: Keets can climb, but they’re not that great at getting down safely.

Problem four: they’re suicidally curious and have worked out how to open the playroom door.

Keri had to keep them under constant supervision and off the shelving and occupied until the grownups came back.

And, as further trouble,

“And that is how I accidentally fostered peace between two species and became mayor of Broccolopolis”

Let me tell you, there are some cargo haulers out there who can make Space Lightning out of anything that can ferment.

And freeze-distilling that stuff in Kelvin-scale temperatures gives it one hell of a kick.

And my brewer in chief decided to drop me off somewhere light years away from my destination.

A planet in the middle of a generations-long war.

By the time I

After many stumbles and a lot of explaining and apologising, how does the first date between little havenworlder and big scary deathworlder go?

It had taken some significant time in negotiations and a lot of
education on both sides. Ground rules established. Diets planned, they
now sat awkwardly across from each other at Unsuitable Food Eat.

Bear cleared his throat three times before he said, “I understand you’re insectivorous? Do you mind sharing a Hakuna Platter?”

“That
is…“ Ryll scrolled

After http://internutter.tumblr.com/post/119809238784/challenge-00851-b120-one-fine-evening-at-a

The deathworlder’s attempts to apologise for the earlier incident and continue to express interest in the little havenworlder

This negotiation booth had a clear barrier between the Human called Bear and the Agamid called Ryll.

Both parties had a security detail and a negotiations counsellor.

“I’m very sorry,” said Bear. “I didn’t mean to scare you. Usually those lines get a big laugh.”

“Cogniphagia is humorous?” meeped Ryll in alarm.

“Uhhh&

It turns out that some species’ mythical creatures are almost identical to real creatures found on the home planet of another species.

K’karik almost forgot to breathe. There, sitting in the enclosure of the Terran zoo, was  clearly Skybear. It was grey like a storm cloud, and sitting up against a tree. Its ears were the white puffs of high stratus clouds.

Just like in the stories.

Legend said the song of the Skybear was a marvel to behold.

Legend didn’