Humans Are Weird

A 174-post collection

Challenge #02479-F289: What in a Name

A small movement has cropped up amongst the Vorax. People who would rather try to live quiet, peaceful, lives instead of piracy and war. When the government goes to make an example out of them, they take the only ship they can get their hands on and flee. They find an uninhabited haven world that's suitable for them to live on and settle down to live quiet lives as farmers, raising their meat animals, hunting wild game, fishing, growing crops, and just having what they wanted most. Peace, not only with each other, but with the galaxy around them. When the less peaceful Vorax come to destroy the colony, they find out that humans, and others, don't take well to bullies, and show the peaceful colony how wrong, and how right, the stories were about the Vorax's old enemies. -- DaniAndShali

When other cultures met the Vikings, the concept of Norsemen or Danes were conglomerated into that one, first idea. Never mind that those who farmed considered themselves different from those who traded or raided. They were all 'Vikings' to the rest of the world, because that was their first impression.

The exact same thing happened to the Vorax. Vorax was not, as it happened, a species name, but rather an occupation, just like the Vikingr once were. They called themselves Vorax because that was what they did. They were Voraxyr. The others called themselves Thranityr but they called themselves that in vain. The rest of the Galactic Alliance had heard Vorax first. So, too, had the Humans... and you know how terrible they are at letting go of the first idea to enter their fluffy little heads.

For centuries, they could not be convinced of the existence of more than two gender identities because they claimed it was unnatural. The hubris and the ignorance inherent just boggles the mind. You have to do immense amounts of work to re-convince the Humans. Even then, the initial label will never go away. Vorax, they were introduced as, and Vorax they will remain. Potentially forever. Hardly anyone remembers who the Vikings who weren't Vikingr were called[1].

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Challenge #02478-F288: Hope in the Dark Times

A distant planet has caught ancient radio signals from earth. They are visual images and audio of the chronicles of a exploratory ship and it's crew.

Over 200 years before humans figured out long-term space travel...

Everyone is confused. -- AmberFox

Filtering things out of the Hydrogen Line is an interesting task. Though it is a band relatively free of interference, there is still signal fade as it disperses through deeper space. Those listening for the echoes of the big bang regularly

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Challenge #02475-F285: Dismantling Babel

Humans may not be able to recreate the visual cacophony of many species in the Allegiance due to a lack of chromatophoric organs,

(though the "body art" some inflict upon themselves both temporarily with chemical compounds on the Dermis, as well as via repeated and what they call "minor" puncturing of said dermal tissue coupled with the injection of colouring chemicals)

But what they can do with their vocal and pneumonic systems in mimetic creation and improvisation is incredible, and now it

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Challenge #02473-F283: Yo Ho, Foe No Mo'

A band of pirates attack a ship they'd learned would be mostly hauling civilians, students, and their possessions. What they don't realize is the ship they attacked, though owned by havenworlders, is filled with deathworlders, mostly humans. To pass the time while waiting for the fight to end, the humans pick up their instruments to practice the music they were going to play at the interspecies music competition. But there are other music lovers out there, too. Can a pirate learn to

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Challenge #02471-F281: Double the Experience

They were twins, identical to the last freckle. It brought them no end of joy with playing pranks on friends, or on unsuspecting galactics, when they wore the exact same clothes and hair styles. Very few have ever seen humans that looked, sounded, and acted so similar that they could practically be ONE person in two bodies. But they were in space for a reason. To learn new foods, new cuisines, new inspirations. They wanted to open a restaurant that could one

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Challenge #02470-F280: Fluidity

A genderfluid human whose sexuality changes along with their gender, attempts to explain how they experience life to someone with very little context, save for that this particular human is sometimes interested in them and sometimes... just wants to play video games together. -- Anon Guest

Humans have so many labels for things. It could be amusing, were it not for the multitude of those who struggle with those labels and what they mean to them. Prefixes and suffixes and interfixes, oh

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Challenge #02467-F277: Human Jae's Video Log

Up next, the top 10 questions you'll get from your intergalactic crewmates. -- Anon Guest

Hey, out there, infonets! It's your friendly wandering Human Jae! Living large on the Edge of the Galactic Alliance, yeeeaaaahhhh... Have no fear, I am mostly harmless, I swear. That thing with the Vorax scout troop was a fluke I have yet to explain. Promise.

So I've been doing the round robin thing, escorting the. Absolute. Cutest. Havenworlders on their scientific excursions, and oh my God I

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Challenge #02464-F274: No Ordinary Fool

Master Chef in SPAAACCEE!!! -- Anon Guest

Chefs tend to treat certain groups of people differently. Professionals who mess up are far more likely to get the chewing out of a lifetime than a small child or a student who is just beginning to learn. The most famous of them who held this philosophy has managed to spread it memetically through most of Human space. Now, every Human chef follows the same philosophy.

Now, because of the Train Wreck Phenomenon, cogniscents all

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Challenge #02453-F263: A General Warning

"Do you wanna go with me, [fellow Havenworlder]? Human Frank invited me to a showing of one of his favourite - what's the word? Ah, "movies"! No, stop screaming! This one is just some made-up story about wooden mush or something. Sounds pretty safe, probably not much violence there."

[ten minutes into Pulp Fiction]

"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!" -- Anon Guest

Never trust Human entertainments. They are made by Deathworlders, for Deathworlders and, for many years after they met and learned about Havenworlders, about Deathworlders.

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Challenge #02452-F262: Tolerance Overload

Genders are like the twin towers; there was two of them, now it's a sensitive topic. -- Anon Guest

[AN: Oh boy, am I glad you're an Anon or I'd track you down and logically explain how this is so wrong on multiple levels]

There were rainbow flags everywhere. People wore their identities on their chests, on their faces, around their wrists and draped over their shoulders like a caped hero. Dave only knew what half of those colour combos meant, and

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Challenge #02446-F256: Do No Harm

In her late teens, early 20's, she went into space to learn to be a medic. From the time she was a small child, she had wanted to be someone who saved lives. She was a Lucker with a twist. For though she never won at cards, dice, or at any game she played, when it came to the struggle between life and death, death would always lose. And she had vowed, no matter her patient be a friend or an enemy,

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Challenge #02427-F237: The Tune Called Yakety Sax

[AN: So Steemit.com is having some shenanigans which prevent me from posting there. Rest assured that this tale will be up as soon as it can be managed, at which point this post will change to the default template. Thank you for your patience and understanding]

Explaining 'The Benny Hill Show' to future Culture classes. -- Anon Guest

Every entertainment is a product of its time and a product of its medium and a product of its culture. Nothing shows this

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Challenge #02422-F232: Crit Happens

Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out 'til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along. ~Terry Pratchett

Also known as being a DM. (Dungeon Master) -- Anon Guest

Imagine a game so complicated that even the experts have to look up the rules. It is not just played with dice, but also cards, charts, tables, books, miniatures, and a hell of a lot of imagination. There is only one person at the

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Challenge #02421-F231: Organically Sourced Isotopes

Imagine the surprise across the Galactic Alliance when they discover that humans have more than a mild tolerance to small doses of radiation, and that some of our plants are (in large enough quantities) active enough to set off sensors designed to detect much more harmful materials...

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bananaequivalentdose -- Adam in Darwin

The stasis box arrived in successive layers of protective wrapping, depending on which port it had shipped through, and which species did

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Challenge #02415-F225: Getting the Message

Depending what you listen to it can affect your mind and body drastically. example being that rush of adrenaline while listening to Ghost Ship of Cannibal Rats by Billy Talent and calm mind while Nocturne from String Quartet No. 2 plays in the background. -- Anon Guest

Shayde had either been picking up outdated slanguage or she was trying to say something without the correct words. She said, "Music is mood," out of nowhere. They had been enjoying a companionable silence on

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