Amalgam Universe

A 856-post collection

Challenge #02216-F026: The Boredom Compulsion

This rumination on Queen's three types of songs, as seen by aliens trying to understand these odd Deathworlders. -- RecklessPrudence

If there is anything to cause the Human brain to skip a few gears, it's listening to The Prophet's Song followed by Fat Bottomed Girls. Both are clearly sung by the same man. Learning that both are written by the same man just makes the disparity more obvious.

One is a philosophical piece about those who foresee doom down the road and how they are treated by the general populace. The other is a diatribe in appreciation for ladies who have large buttocks. Even a novice could tell them apart. Then the hypothetical listener hears something like Lazing on a Sunday Afternoon. Frivolous, light and a seeming relic of an era long bygone before its author's lifetime.

It's at this point that the listener might wonder what the flakk was up with this one being of talent. Others would use him as a prime example of Human unpredictability and capriciousness. The truth, closer to the bone, is that those with a capacity to create have their emotions as a co-author at all times. Even the most serious creators just want to doodle around and have fun with what they do.

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Challenge #02215-F025: Strange Instruments

I have no idea why, but I kinda wanna see what you make with this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lTYPvArbGo

sorry if its too hard. -- Anon Guest.

The travelling Museum of Sound History had docked with Amalgam and, naturally, Shayde had to drag Rael into it. She had been catching up on a decent portion of the five hundred years she had missed, and seeing some of it in one lump was always a guaranteed 'draw' for her.

One

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Challenge #02214-F024: Ill Met in Sarkis Ten

Class 5 Deathworlders react to the information of human self-cannibalism in extreme situations. -- Anon Guest

Class one Deathworlders only have one elemental portion of their environment attempting to kill them. Class two get two of them. All the way up to level five, with the plants, the animals, the geology, the climate, and astronomy of their solar system repeatedly attempting to kill them. They get to be Deathworlders by surviving all of this and making it out to discover that there

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Challenge #02212-F022: Companion Ship

A human finally finds a crew member who understands their sarcasm. -- Anon Guest

You have to be careful when you're a human around non-humans. Not all of them understand intonation, and just use your words. Sarcasm may be lost on the slow of mind, but it's also lost on those with different tonal coding to you. Worse - sometimes it's both.

Helpful hint to other humans like me who keep using sarcasm out of habit. Always point out why the sarcastic

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Challenge #02211-F021: Edge Case

A young human has many questions about the Vorax, specifically considering potential friendship. -- Anon Guest

This is Edge Space. Where the laws are negligible or arbitrary and generally written around whatever is most convenient. Here, the weirdest things can happen. Havenworlders and Deathworlders cohabit. People are more inclined to explain things when offense happens. In Galactic Space, one is expected to use good behaviour. In Edge Space, one is expected to communicate what good behaviour is. People normally at arms come

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Challenge #02210-F020: Keep on Rolling

A Cheese rolling in Gloucestershire. A bunch of humans running down a really steep hill in order to out race each other or possibly catch a wheel of cheese in order to win said cheese. People get injured. Try explaining that to Aliens -- Anon Guest

"This is a sport?" said Glaux, who was honestly attempting to understand their Ships' Human. "In a place called..." they looked up the spelling. "Glaw-sess-ter-shire?"

"Gloss-ter-sheer," corrected Human Tess. "It's a common mistake, but yes. That's

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Challenge #02209-F019: An Unnatural Fascination

Alright, so I have yet to see something about pyromaniacs in any of the posts out there and figured here was a good place to submit the idea.

Could you imagine them finding out about some humans really, really loving fire?

Like sure, they use fire and appreciate it and its many uses, but maybe there aren’t any aliens that actually love or enjoy fire?

Like there are many of us that actively play with fire or are drawn to it

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Challenge #02208-F018: Relative Superman

A Havenworlder was adopted and raised by Humans from a young age. -- Anon Guest

A ruined city. A lone survivor. Those who had come to help take the orphan in with the best of intentions... So many stories of heroes begin that way. One famous one has the orphan saving their adopted world for all of their life. Red capes optional.

Such was not the case for Sylkin. She was a Thof, and the only survivor of a Vorax raid on

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Challenge #02207-F017: Silent and Deadly

You should be wary of Humans. All the time. They Bond together and are nearly unstoppable.

However or Whatever you do, DO NOT underestimate/provoke the silent one who doesn't do that.

Please write a story with the focus on the quiet crew-member in the corner. -- Anon Guest

Humans say there are Cat People and Dog People. Galactic Society has largely misunderstood this to mean that there are Humans like dogs, who spread friendliness and affection wherever they go, and Humans

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Challenge #02206-F0165: Microscopic Passengers

The Aliens in Board learn that one of the Human-Crewmembers has Herpes.

Fact: More than 3.7 Billion People have it. XD -- Anon Guest

"It's my duty to inform my captain and crew that I have a class two plague known as Herpes. I'm on a permanent course of antivirals to prevent its propagation."

Captain Gorthax, mildly alarmed, consulted the free infonets and read, GalStand Medical Primer for Newcomers: Subheading - Plague Disease Classes and resulting mis-assumptions.

Like most numeric classifications,

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Challenge #02205-F015: Correcting Memetic Foibles

European Humans have Something around 2 % of DNA from the Neandertaler in them.

Humans share 50 to 80% of their DNA with the Common Banana.

All that separates US from Apes are roughly 1- 5 % genetic differences.

The Aliens learn about these Facts for the first Time.... -- Anon Guest

"A common mistake in early DNA studies is mistaking content for relationships. Some are indicators, like the two percent of DNA that some Humans share with Neanderthals. Or the ninety-eight percent that

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Challenge #02204-F014: Complex Organic Chemistry

Class five Deathworlders have Problems dealing with a planet which Flora contains a mysterious Plant (Wink Wink).

For them it is as deadly as Arsenic is for us.

Their reaction when Humans Line Up to colonise it -- Anon Guest

[AN: Going with convergent evolution because the chances of weed happening exactly as it happened on Earth, on another planet, are astronomical at best]

Things had been going badly for the latest J'krog colony. The world, verdant and unclaimed, had promised a

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Challenge #02203-F013: Pride Goeth...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IhnUgAaea4M -- Anon Guest

[AN: Offensensitivity warning for anglo-saxon four-letter words in the lyrics]

If there is any sign of a sickening nation, it is national egotism. Every time a nation gets a metaphorical big head, it is destined for collapse. Britannia did, once, rule the waves. Then it's empire collapsed in a rash of independence after the nation nearly collapsed due to two multinational wars in rapid succession.

America, once, was a great nation. Then

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Challenge #02202-F012: Examining Uncertain Truths

Humans have had alot of time and reasons to think up Gods and Dieties.

How would they(aliens) react If they learn about the flying Spaghetti-Monster-Religion or the disturbing Cult(ure) of Cthulu.

Or even worse.... Boy-bands and their fanatic Fans !

Have fun :-) -- Anon Guest

Welcome to Xenotheology, the most complicated course in the field of omnistudies. We begin by acknowledging that all faiths are true, for interesting values of 'true'. You will come across materials in this field of

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Challenge #02201-F011: Quantity Control

Havenworlders learn about Meat consumption, Animal-Stocking and The USA-Attitude of "more equals better". -- Anon Guest

Havenworlders are aware of carnivores on an intellectual level. Many understand that one species' nutrition doesn't work for all species. Some Havenworlders are insectivorous and adorably claim to be mighty hunters before they meet Deathworlders.

What surprised them is what some Deathworlders did in order to obtain meat.

"So. Since your kind invented agriculture, you attempted to farm meat like you farmed plant products," said Kiki,

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