A human opens a Beauty Salon for Reptilian Customers, it occurs to me that its Male reptiles who often try to attract mates.
[AN: Thanks to Tumblr’s habit of dropping links when I copy/paste, I have a new “streamlined” and “easier” procedure in which I have the HTML of my tagline info in a separate file and, after I’m done doing the story, I swap to HTML and copy/paste that sucker in. Then I edit the muse food count accordingly. Thanks staff, for making me not trust the utilities on this site]
The concept of cosmetics is as old as dirt. Literally. But the humans, of course, were the first to take it to extremes.
This shop, Universal Beauty, was the one responsible for introducing the seal-like Iil'shur'aur'ur to hair gel. Though it was not responsible for the minor wars that followed[1]. It still does roaring business despite the fact that it’s run by humans.
“Welcome to Universal Beauty. Do you have an appointment?”
“PLEASE,” begged the lizard, “She said ‘yes’ and we’re going to meet face-to-face in three hours! I have to look my best for her, I have to! Please. I’ll pay double-time!”
The clerk took in the lizard’s general air of inspired desperation, and the offer of double time, and set off a softly musical alarm.
Experts swarmed, whisking the desperate lizard away and into the one studio that was always kept empty for such emergencies. Meryl Jonson saw all this on her monitors and descended from her office for a consult. They would have called her down anyway.
She arrived just as they were scanning the poor male in his underwear. He had a nice, matching bra for his heat packs. Good. That was a start.
“This is your first time in any beauty salon?” she asked.
“Yessir,” the hapless male squeaked.
“Don’t worry. We don’t use the more frightening aspects of the cosmetics industry. All we are going to do is… accentuate… your natural assets.”
“…but all of the options in the menu…”
“Are lies. You don’t want to be deceitful during your first meeting, do you? Starting a relationship on deceit is not the way to go.”
“Oh. Uh. Yes. Of course. I just want to look my best for her.”
“That’s what we’re very good at.”
He still got The Works, of course. Paying double time gets anyone The Works. Full derma, nail, and crest treatments, with the gentleman’s choice of alluring scent. He left glistening, with his clothes neatened and pressed.
And in good time for his date, who had booked an earlier appointment weeks ago.
[1] Because it’s surprising the lengths some people will go to to have selkie-smooth fur.
