Amalgam Universe

A 2280-post collection

Challenge #01287-C192: So Like Immunity

The immune system is constantly walking the razor thin edge between doing sweet fuck all and killing you as collateral damage in an apocalyptic war. -- RecklessPrudence

They said that humans were much like their own immune system. Q'voth took that to mean that they were proof against anything that wanted to kill them. There was no way that a direct attack would work.

Therefore, Q'voth played the long game. Ingratiating her people with the humans. Infiltrating their everyday life. Whittling away their resources. Campaigning to turn their own laws against them.

Acting like a cancer against them. Flying under the radar.

What Q'voth didn't know, until it was far too late, was that the humans were like their own immune system. Which was also a self-immolating maniac that was very capable of a scorched earth policy. Humans could survive on far less than the T'rnathi. They could survive in situations far more dire than the T'rnathi.

And they could sabotage their own environment to the point where no T'rnathi dared set foot in it.

The message was clear. They would literally rather die than be dominated. And they would make certain that the ashes of defeat would be all that any enemy could claim from a technical victory. They even had a name for it. Pyrrhic victory.

The winner wins, o yes. But what they win is so ruined that the victory is no victory at all.

Q'voth was very careful to ensure things were entirely fair from then on.

(Muse food remaining: 15. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

Challenge #01283-C188: Steep Learning Curve

Names of recordings of training scenarios.

"Ode to places a cutting torch should never go"

"Three drones, one airlock and no sense"

And the cautionary tale about plasma torches, hypergolic fuel and explosive decompression simply entitled: "Don't" -- RecklessPrudence

Human training videos were baffling. They seemed designed to entertain, but also contained the full, gruesome consequences in order to horrify their audience into learning the lesson.

Newbies, it seemed, were suicidally incompetent. Sometimes, they were also homicidally so. And chief amongst their

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Challenge #01282-C187: Boredom Unbecoming

Something for the SPOEns: "Words are perhaps the most vulgar of all of humanity’s inventions, in that there is no benefit in keeping them sacred and locked away. Their true magic only takes place when they are read and spoken by many." -- RecklessPrudence

Rael looked at the quote on the graffiti wall. Then he looked at the larger tangle of artistic font that sprawled across the greater effort. Once decoded, it read, Evolve or die!. And worse, Shayde had written

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Challenge #01278-C183: Kintsugi Ronin

The art of repairing pottery with gold or silver lacquer, understanding that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken. This can also apply to People. -- Knitnan

The ships' human was, in their own words, winding down. They had extracted themself from their armoured shell, removed the thermal suit that helped regulate their temperature, and otherwise stripped down to their Skins.

Most Gigaru kept away from the human at this point. Downtime was important to these mammals. And yet Kithkith

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Challenge #01273-C178: The Coffee Oath

"It is caffeine alone..." You know the rest of this quote. Have fun. -- KnitNan

Theobromine was dangerous for most species, but humans took it in several different preparations. This was the waking preparation, as the ship's human went about their post-somnolence ritual.

Humans could push themselves to operate for an entire standard day, if they needed to. Their human had just done so, and proceeded to sleep for an astonishing twelve hours. Now they emerged, still in their sleeping clothes, to

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Challenge #01267-C172: Nothing to See Here

Your challenge today is to write your entire oneshot without using the word "the" -- Gallifreya

[AN: and one of my favourite words, too]

They never came to Barabindaru, a tiny little town that used to have its glory days in years of steam, when coal and water were vital to moving. They did not settle in Farmer Tarlee's paddock and wander around for up to half an hour before Kid Tarlee paddled over to have a chat.

There was some extended

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Challenge #01266-C171: He's Just a Softie, Really

http://iopele.tumblr.com/post/145552354602/iamacutetiger-cosmictuesdays-pilgrimkitty

Captain Steve and his horgler -- Anon Guest

Humans will pet anything. It is a fact as true as their renowned insanity. They get reward through tactile contact and it is part of their pack-bonding process. Almost nothing, short of losing their arm on contact, will stop them.

The only thing that has stopped them in the past is knowledge of the frailty of the thing they wish to touch.

Humans stopped by planetary station

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Challenge #01263-C168: Bodyguard

http://iztarshi.tumblr.com/post/145107805571

On the flipside, when the space orcs want you safe, you are very safe -- Anon Guest

There were times when Talil could swear that humans were made of determination and venom.

They were not, strictly speaking, toxic. Not completely. But their skin was host to ecologies of bacteria that made their lives possible, and had been weaponised against Havenworlders. Their guts were hosts to bacteria that were toxic even to them. Their bites could fester

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Challenge #01257-C162: Vital Skills

There are things we need to be able to do to cope or succeed in Life. How to light a fire, cook a meal. Pick a Life skill and how it works. -- KnitNan

Red alert roused Pel from unconsciousness, and, because it was an urgent alarm, she launched herself from her bunk and into her lifesuit before she had fully opened her eyes. It was a matter of course for a Spacer to be able to get into their emergency gear

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Challenge #01243-C148: Morning People

http://kenzyshipseverything.tumblr.com/post/126911368896/nicckpetricca-this-video-is-actually-my

Imagine your otp -- Anon Guest

Music was playing. Something ancient from the Vault, shared on something called a 'mix tape' by Ambassador Shayde into Lyr's personal file collection. Whatever it was, it was too jumpy to be morning music.

Jule attempted to burrow under the covers without moving much. Why his best-beloved had to be so darn frenetic on the mornings of her holidays was a mystery. This was their mutual time off. They

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Challenge #01242-C147: Confused in Translation

http://haberdashing.tumblr.com/post/143298955329/motorizedduck-translating-is-hard-work-even -- Gallifreya

"It is... ah... what is word? A means of communicating when no longer present. Wisdom to be passing down from generations. Time... pressed...into formats for sharing."

"That," said M'llix, "Sounds rather impressive."

"No. Not being impressive. Is much common," said the human. "So everywhere that is ignored. People using for profession considered not having real profession. Is basis for all entertainments, but overlooked. Children is learning from young age, mastery of such.

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Challenge #01231-C136: Humorous Revelation

Human's reaction on realising they share a vessel with Captain K'rik, Doctor M'koi, and Ensign Ch'koff (is there a Lieutenant Spukk too?) -- Gallifreya

[AN: I had been wondering when someone would clue in. And for the record, Jain holds the position of Spock]

If there was one stereotypical behaviour that belonged to humans - besides their suicidal combination of curiosity and insanity - it would have to be their love of gadgets.

Doctor M'Koi watched with growing skepticism as the human

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Challenge #01230-C135: So This is How I Die

http://haberdashing.tumblr.com/post/143039331394/memeufacturing-human-after-being-stabbed-four -- Gallifreya

There are games the mind plays in extremis. One of its favourites is Hallucinations. But when the imagination is lacking or the mind is sufficiently aware of reality, the mind defaults to Good News, Bad News.

Good News, there is still air.

Bad News, it is filling with smoke.

Good News, there is still gravity.

Bad News, I am on my back.

Q'riikix, known to the humans in the crew as "Queasy", rattled

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Challenge #01228-C133: "Again"?

"I hate to be 'that guy' but I've glued myself to the ceiling again..." -- Gallifreya

There is a place for everyone in the UFTP stellar fleet! All volunteers for the stellar services are tested for their strengths and places where they can perform at their best! Join today! -- UFTP Stellar Fleet recruitment flier.

Second Technician Kevin Maladroit checked the maintenence schedule before he got out of bed. Slow day. Which meant it was a bad one. The crew of the

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Challenge #01227-C132: No Way Out

:From a former loose cannon/maverick's inner monologue:

But they were in a position of authority now, and for some reason that meant they didn't get to have their way anymore. -- Recklessprudence

Blaize Hartley hadn't meant to become a hero. It just sort of happened that way. She leaped in where angels would fear to hear about and winged it from there. She had an extreme knack for getting herself both into and out of the most ridiculous of pickles.

Including

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