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Flash fiction fresh from my fingers to your mind!

Challenge #00258: Meeting as Equals

The correct way to take a feminist out on a date.

“Hey.”

“Hello.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“Where do you like to go for fun?”

A smile. “Are you going to ask me out?”

“I’m going to try,” he announced. “I think you’re cute and I’d like to get to know you.”

“Have you heard of steampunk?”

“Uh. Maybe? Gears and corsets and things?”

“That’s the superficial part. There’s a band playing, tonight. You can be my plus one.”

“Should I dress up?”

“Sure you won’t embarrass yourself?”

“If it makes you smile, it’s worth it.”

*

He came in a zoot suit and spats. The tie clip was made out of clockwork gears.

“Ooo. Fast.”

“I cheated. This was my great-grandpa’s. All I did was add the accessories. And freshen up the feathers in the hat.”

“I meant the outfit. It’s a little modern for Steampunk, but you should fit in anyway. It looks nice.”

“You’re looking very… bronze.”

“Of course. Tonight, I’m mechanical.”

“Mechanical?”

“I’ll explain on the way.”

*

She’d paid for the tickets, so he paid for the food and drinks. Since they were both working, tomorrow, the alcohol was off the list. But inebriation wasn’t necessary to have a good time.

The robots on stage were amazing. It was hard to believe that, at the end of their day, they took all that off and became ordinary human beings again.

It was hard to imagine anyone here in hoodies and sweatpants.

“Wow. Everyone here is gorgeous.” Even the people not ‘magazine gorgeous’ were gorgeous. Even the sort of people his high-school friends would holler abuse at were gorgeous.

“It’s a different aesthetic,” she explained. “You don’t have to fit the mould just to fit in. Everything’s customized. Queen Bella, over there? She easily drops two thousand on each outfit.”

Queen Bella was painted gold and almost dripping with costume jewelry and gears. She also flounced with frills and sashayed with sashes.

“Where do you even go to get that kind of look?”

“Somehow, I don’t see you in a corset,” she joked.

“Yeah, but a nice waistcoat? And tails? Do you think a trilby or a top hat?”

“Mmmm…” she considered. “Maybe you could try a boater…”

*

They were laughing all the way back to her place. He lingered on her threshold. “It’ll be a shame to go back to normal.”

“You can always sneak a few gears onto your daily bling. Nobody’ll notice, I swear.”

“Possibly. Men have less bling options in the real world than the ladies.” He rolled his eyes. “Darn mainstream society…”

“I dunno. Maybe a nice waistcoat? A bowtie…”

“Bowties are cool.”

They kissed goodnight before he went home happy.

It was a great first date. May it be one of many more.

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Challenge #00257: What a Wonderful World

When truly equity is nurtured upon Mother Earth between the genders (Again, because I’m thinking of MLK.)

“So… Mari. Is that one a he or a she?”

“Gram-MAAAA…” Mari blushed. “You promised…”

“I did, I did. I’m sorry. I forgot.”

“I only let you be my show-and-tell ‘cause you promised you wouldn’t do any of the old-fashioned stuff.”

Gramma nodded. “I

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"Why We Won't Stop Fighting For Our Right To Purity"

Someone with an ARTICULATELY RATIONAL reason for detesting Sara and waging futile jihad against mutants because of her. (Just because I’m feeling deep in my ‘Sympathy for the Devil’ phase today being the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington.) Something akin to what Luther did on the doorframe would be nice as well.

(#00256)

The photo showed a slightly-horsey girl with green-blue scales. She was smiling, but not looking at the camera. The resolution made it clear

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Challenge #00255: The wall and the Hypocri-sea.

The invisible fence, 15 feet high that divides the America that lectures others on “multiculturalism”.

It was a rich white girls’ party. Anyone watching the video could tell. It wasn’t in a house. It wasn’t even in a mansion. It was in a palace. The theme was multiculturalism.

She was wearing sexy lederhosen with a chinese shirt and Inca shoes. She also sported a rainbow sombrero and a necklace made of ‘fangs’.

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Challenge #00254: Honey, and Plenty of Money

Bees.

[AN: Any relationship between certain corporations in this fiction and certain poison companies is strictly imaginary]

Fantraxin did not kill bees. That was its primary selling point. It killed all other insects that may predate on crops, but not the bees. How it did so, of course, was a company secret.

A secret that made them the largest corporation on the planet, almost overnight.

Or, at least, it would have. If they weren’t already the biggest global power ever

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Challenge #00253: I'm Sorry, We Can't Help You

Greater Deregulation’s more esoteric moments.

“But I don’t have any of my papers. My house burned down.”

“If you had signed up for the TrakMe program…”

“I had. My parents signed me up just after I got a name. I’ve been trying to sign on with or without their help for forty years.”

“You can voluntarily sign up for the TrakMe program at any time,” recited the

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Challenge #00252: Be Careful What You Wish For

Agent Pertwee and the first moments he realized that his job sucked for reasons he didn’t expect.

[AN: Once again, it’s Jane Pertwee :) ]

The FBI had been covertly watching this school for some time. Now, with the Mutant Registration Act, it was watching more overtly. As in, agents in the field, tailing their respective suspects, and making sure that a bunch of teenagers with superpowers….

Well…

Didn’t wind up acting like a bunch of

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Challenge #00251: Terror Watch

Agent Pertwee and his take on watching the terror with the textiles.

[AN: Agent Pertwee is a girl :P]

Agent Jane Pertwee sighed. She’d signed up for Terror Watch because it was the fast-track past the glass ceiling and on to better things. She should have known that the dicks upstairs would have picked the one least likely to do anything worthy of garnering promotion by stopping it in its tracks.

Right now, she was holding up a wall watching

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Challenge #00250: Birds of a Feather

Kitty/alwaysfemale!Colossus.

“I’m here!” Kitty announced. This was supposed to be a place full of people like her. Like, where was the welcome committee?

BAMF! “Ah, hubches madchen,” A blue demon in a black and red outfit appeared in an almost stereotypical puff of sulphurous smoke. “Pleased to make your acquaintance,” it reached for her with a freakish, three-fingered hand.

Kitty screamed.

A giant, metal hand held off the demon by encapsulating its

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Challenge #00249: What Monsters Hath Science Wrought?

Catbug.

Mythos Entertainment Inc. was working on all manner of new things. Their bio-labs were cooking up foetuses at the rate of knots.

Graham Ptolowitz stared at the thing in the pen. This was the angel/fairy production team, and the abomination before him had originally been a cat.

“We were working on a hexapodal mammalian life-form,” said Dewitt. “So splicing and activating the hexapodal gene was primary priority.”

“We did attempt bat wings, since they are

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Challenge #00248: More Deadlier...

Magnificently mundane…and yet still formidable.

It is said that women are like tea leaves. You don’t know how strong they can be until you put them in hot water. Mavis had always laughed at that. She was as mild as milk! Meek as mud.

Until the invaders came.

She’d just turned her back for a second. Let go of the pram for just long enough to grab a can of beans. And when she turned back,

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Challenge #00247: Craftsmanship

Ordinary excellence.

“If you want it to last long, hire an expert. If you want it to last for long enough, hire a JOAT.” – Galactic saying.

Rael got most of his income from people who wanted their patches to last long enough. As in, long enough to make a profit out of this trip. Or, long enough to get me back home. And, in some cases, long enough so I can trade this heap in for maximum due.

He

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Challenge #00246: Meter and Rhyme

Professor Xavier on why he abandoned the idea of a institute theme song.

“Professor? Why isn’t there a school song?”

“To be very brief, I couldn’t come up with anything good,” he confessed. “Begin with the fact that the Institute doesn’t have a catchy name, and add to that the fact that I have all the musical talents of a diseased whelk…” he shrugged. “If you can come

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Challenge #00245: Learning Curve

Scott, the new floral and somewhat emotionally expressive studmuffin, wows the blue hairs at the convention. His ego does a world of good for it.

“I do a lot of beach-combing for interesting pieces,” said Scott. “And I get bucket-loads of shells from that, I never knew why I picked them up in the first place, but I had bucket-loads of shells and I had to do something with them…” Click. The next slide showed an orchid

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Challenge #00244: One Beautiful Morning at the Bi-Annual Fair

I’m in an oooey gooey mood so please give me a sweet romantic sappy drippy waff-fest about a couple who meet long after they knew each other in high school. Extra points for any amusement park item.

In order to reduce the severity of Silly Season, Amalgam Station held a station-wide fair once every five months. Every human got some time to play, even folks like Lyr, who worked security.

Even other species got into it. Chitanians were busy hanging

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