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A 199-post collection

Challenge #00827-B096: Cataclysmic Server Event

Extinction Level Events are just the real worlds way of conducting a server update.

[AN: Apologies for the lateness. I got distracted.]

“Okay, so what kind of server reboot are we looking at?”

“Rocks fall, everything dies.“

“Seriously? How are the event quests even managed for that?”

“We’re
removing most, but not all of the Saurians and replacing them with Mammals. Loads of customisation possibilities with the Evolution
quests.”

“Yahuh. And what are the event quests for the Saurians?”

“Try to save the world. None of them are taking it up though. Looks like everyone’s tired of feathers and roaring.”

Tapping on the keys. “Dude! This entire species run doesn’t have the cogniscence mod.”

“Uh. Whoops.”

“It’s too late to do anything to fix it! They’re still at hunt-and-kill and nowhere near rockets.”

“Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit…”

“Damnit.”

“Well… nothing to be done about that. Start working towards the cogniscence mod on the mammals after the reboot.”

“Yessir.”

“You’re bloody lucky nobody else noticed. One hundred and seventy-five million years and no cogniscence. Crap.”

[Muse food remaining: 15. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Vote for my stuff!]

Challenge #00820-B089: Going Viral

:Speaking of real-life, actually-happened biological warfare development:

After deployment failed, killing only five hundred million individuals before the target population began developing immunity, development started on another attempt using a different disease. Loss of containment on that one killed ten million during testing, and let the unfinished virus into the wild.

(…The twist is it was the testing of RHD (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rabbithaemorrhagicdisease) in Aussie attempts to control the rabbit population after myxy (http://en.wikipedia.org/

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Challenge #00809-B078: Flight School

“We will begin this course with some examples of deconstructive lithobraking. This 30-minute holofilm is titled ‘When the Ground Isn’t Your Friend.’”

Wherever humans go, they bring alcohol. In actuality, you are better off if they bring it, because otherwise they brew it. And you do not want to know what goes into the process, because humans will drink the byproduct of anything they can get to ferment.

And sometimes they stick Things in it, after distilling, to “enhance the flavour”

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Challenge #00743 - B012: A Requiem for Glory

The grass is always greener on the other side of the nuclear war.
Sometimes due to glowing with radiation, granted.

“War,” said the Elder. “We had to fight it, of course. Those evil bastards on the other continent were going to destroy our way of life. So we had to destroy theirs.”

“Um,” said Krii, raising her hand.

“Yes, what?”

“Did they know that was why we attacked? Because, um, it might explain

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Challenge #00737 - B006: Fighting Words

“Veni Ad Me Frat”, Latin for “Come At Me, Bro”.

Shayde sighed as Rael caught her out again. “No? How about ‘non me tracagnum’?”

“Don’t beat me,” said Rael. “How about you stop pulling your Hackmeyer strategies, lay off the BS, and talk like a scientist to these people?”

“It’s hard,” Shayde whined. “I’m too used tae no’ being listened

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Challenge #00736 - B005: Do We Need Them?

A friend and I, up in tropical Queensland on holiday - land of my birth. We are being buzzed by flies large enough to need Air Traffic Control, and slowly being drained of blood by the clouds of mozzies. The following conversation does not reflect any of my actual views. It was borne of frustration and humour.

Me: -slap- Hey, do we need flies for anything? Like, do they perform a vital role in the ecosystem or something?
Friend (amused): Yeah, I

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Challenge #00735 - B004: Might or Flight

“You suggested something diplomatic,” [Person] noted.

“What, I can’t be diplomatic?” I asked, affronted. “I’m extremely diplomatic. I’m just brimming with diplomacy.”

“Of the Admiral Perry variety,” [Person] said.

“Gunship diplomacy is still diplomacy,” I protested.

“This is all very well for definitive terms,” reminded Captain Mij. “But when it’s us versus the humans, perhaps a more delicate version of diplomacy might be called

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Challenge #00732 - B001: The Better Part of Valour

Person #1: A ‘strategic withdrawal’ is running away. But with dignity.
Person #2: So lay in a course and let’s get the dignified hell out of here.

Human ships. A fleet’s worth. Just hanging around in space, as one of their own authors was wont to say, in precisely the way that bricks don’t.

The crew of the Expendable Question could instantly tell that these vessels had been made by humans. They showed a deathworlder’s

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Challenge #00731 - A366: That's Me All Over

“I thought we were going to knock it’s head off?” “We’re disassembling it into easily carried pieces”

“I really would advise against that,” said their victim. Currently a head on a shelf. But that was the problem when one was dealing with robots. They didn’t always die all at once.

“Stop talking, you’re supposed to be dead,” said McLargehuge. He was the smaller, smarter, and sneakier of the two thieves.

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Challenge #00724 - A359: Technobabble

From a forum conversation on technobabble: “we’re running low on pixie dust and the containment breach can’t hold any more rabbits so the ship is going to explode from thermal expansion and kill us all”

Responded to with: “Pfft, everyone knows pixie dust is self-containing.”

They called it the Ark.

“So… you got all the StarMetal that was ever made, and turned it into… this?”

“There’s also magically re-enforced Dweomer Steel. It’

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Challenge #00720 - A355: The Abomination

“SPACE IT!” “BURN IT!” “We’ll compromise. LAUNCH IT INTO THE SUN!”

“What is it?” asked M'ri.

“I think it’s a human artefact,” Chobb turned the object over in her hands. It was roughly spherical, and featured false fur in lurid colours. There were comical parodies of eyes above a birdlike pointed beak. Yet it had mammalian ears and ducklike feet. “I think it might be a platypus…

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Challenge #00719 - A354: Divinity Proclivity

I am not the god of reason and understanding, I am the GOD OF THUNDER AND LIGHTNING -Thor

The halo was a dead give-away, really. Something about a God in mortal form made a visible aura of light a definite thing.

May ran through ever possible conversation gambit in her head and finished up with, “So you’re a God, then.”

“Not a capital-G god,” said the divinity. “Not any more. Not enough followers, you see.

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Challenge #00718 - A353: One Afternoon in a High School Classroom

“The Mongols sent diplomatic caravans to establish an alliance with them, and they responded by massacring them. Twice. Subsequently the region’s population dropped by 90% or so for some reason.”

[AN: My internet is a sack of suck at the moment, so I’m doing the most recent prompt. My apologies to those who were waiting for their prompt to turn up. I will find a way to get to your prompt]

“Whoah, whoah, whoah…”

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Challenge #00717 - A352: Pre-Luddite

The first cyborg hate crime probably happened around the time the first peg leg was ripped off with malice aforethought.

“Ereb… ka… heb…” Lynn dutifully wrote down the hieroglyphs and checked the translations. Her quest for extra credit had her translating old manuscripts that had been collected from, apparently, the dawn of time.

This was an ancient form of writing, from the super-early period of Egyptian civilisation, so translation was especially tricky.

She stretched the kinks out

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Challenge #00683 - A318: Different Perspective

Free prompt! This ticket entitles the writer to do any daily drabble that just needs to be written, and may be used out of sequence.

[AN: The following is a preview of sorts for my book-in-progress, Kung Fu Zombies. However the point of view presented may not appear in the book. Essentially, I’m cleansing my mental palette]

If she wanted to be kind, E would say that Aiden astonished her. Amazed, confounded and confused. Maybe even a little bit of

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