InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12554 posts

The Jagerkin: who knew they had such a passion for matchmaking? (and such a lack of talent at it)?

(#00156)

“He iss boy, hyu iss gorl. Vhat more could hyu vant?”

“How about a pulse?” she indicated the man in question. A rather well-preserved mummy in their current oubliette. He had fantastic bone structure, but then… all he was was bone structure. “Or flesh?”

“Hokay, so he needs a liddle of de fixink opp. Since vhen is dot new?”

“I don’t have the equipment, and I’m not exactly certain he’ll be worth the bother. That, and I’ll essentially  be his mother. That’s incest. Euw.”

“Hokay. So dere is more dan vun liddle flaw to my plen…”

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Siracha makes anything more edible - theoretically.

(#00155)

“Why is there only a bottle of Siracha in the survival rations?”

“Because the people who packed it assumed that anyone needing it would be able to live off the land. And Siracha, as it says on the lable, makes anything more edible.”

“But I’m allergic and this landscape is entirely poisonous.”

“We shall write a scathing letter to the company the minute we get out of this mess. Pay attention, would you? I’m trying to build a Siracha-powered

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geekhyena: myuncertainlife: How do you guys not have a word for that? Mom always called it "Fox's wedding" or "Monkey's wedding", idk...

geekhyena:

myuncertainlife:

How do you guys not have a word for that?

Mom always called it “Fox’s wedding” or “Monkey’s wedding”, idk where she got it from. My grandma called it a sunshower.  


Aussies call it “liquid sunshine”. FYI

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"Due to last year's incident involving "The Ballad of Cemetery Sue", the lyrics and/or script of any act in the talent show must be approved...

(#00154)

The entire nerd portion of the school moaned in disappointment. They all knew what it meant. The next talent show would be stripped, pasteurized, sanitized and otherwise made dull, bland, and completely boring.

“And I was going to juggle a chainsaw, a bowling ball, and a fresh egg,” whined Kurt.

Only one was cackling.

“Sara, no-o-o-o-o-o…” said Todd, possibly on automatic.

“But I was going to give them exactly what they wanted, and nothing of what they asked for,” protested Sara.

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Young Knights and Old Soldiers

Saw this quote online, figured it might inspire something interesting.

“Hoping to find a ‘knight in shining armor’ is a worthless dream.  His blade razor-edged, his shield polished, his breastplate ornately-gilded, they say only this - that his experience in battle is nothing, and his courage has never been tested. He has nothing but ambition and optimism in his corner, and he could easily falter and flee when that shine fades.  Hope instead to find the steadfast soldier in

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Prompt: Their actions may not have changed history, but they certainly changed geography.

(#00152)

They had called themselves the League of Justice. Ordinary folks who used sparky inventions to foil, imprison, or otherwise stop other sparks. And they caught Sara.

She, and her clank storage trunk, were the only things to come out of the resulting crater.

“I see you rescued yourself,” said Gil.

“I told them not to mess with my luggage. They should have taken me seriously.”

“What were they doing?”

“Changing the course of history, they believed,” Sara looked back. “They finished

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Challenge #151: One Stormy Evening at Genracon

Klaus + Da Boyz + Comic Convention = Wacky Hijinks

“Ve FIGHT!”

Lightning raged, both natural and artificial, through the iron catacombs where he and this idiot trio of Jaegers had decided to pick a fight.

“Not so close to the por–”

KRAKKOW!

“–tal…”

“Vot?”

The lights came back on. Crowds in varying degrees of unrealistic dress stared at the tangle of Baron and Jaegermonsters…

And burst into shrieking applause.

Maxim straightened first,

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