InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12551 posts

Challenge #00483 - A108: Yo Daddy SO Dense...

Gentlemen, behold, the singularity of stupid. – RecklessPrudence

[AN: I’ve already spoken out against mental ablism and received crap for it. No help - just crap. I feel like I’m walking on a fairy floss tightrope with incipient rain overhead, BUT - st*pid is an ablist slur please help us all find something else]

“O divine Powers, that is such a dense idea…”

“No denser than yo Daddy.”

“Yeah, well yo Daddy so large - when he sits around the domicile, he sits around the domicile.”

“Well yo Daddy so dense, he’s a marked navigation hazard.”

“Yo Daddy so unappealing, he has to tie meat around his neck so the dog will give him affection.”

“Yo Daddy so uneducated, he thinks raison d'être is some brand of dried grapes.”

Shayde leaned over to Rael and whispered, “Is it me, or has humor gone downhill since everything got politically correct?”

“It’s just the Insulter Apprentice Tryouts. Shush.”

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Challenge #00482 - A107: What is Real?

Don’t you smile at me… that’s not even a real smile! It’s just a bunch of teeth playing with my mind! – RecklessPrudence

The robot, trying to please, returned to a neutral expression display. “My apologies,” it said. “I am built to serve. How may I help you, today?”

Aisha sighed. Of all the bodies she could have hauled into her life raft, it had to be one of the service ‘bots from the

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aromaveil: Please give this tiny baby platypus notes. I don't like seeing the hateful comments directed at me from the Men's Rights blogs...

aromaveil:

Please give this tiny baby platypus notes. I don’t like seeing the hateful comments directed at me from the Men’s Rights blogs on tumblr so if this baby platypus gets over 36 notes i will be okay and i will see people reblogging this platypus instead of mean things

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Challenge #00481 - A106: Lead Balloon

I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates when he said “I drank what?” — RecklessPrudence

Jones had had enough. “Actually, he said that he owed a rooster to Asclepius, the Greek god of healing, and asked his friend to pay the debt. He knew damn well he was drinking hemlock and chugged it like it was cheap beer.”

The rest of the meeting stared at her.

“I’m tired of historically inaccurate jokes, okay? Socrates was a bad-ass and nobody

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Challenge #00480 - A105: Proof of Reading

(New scientific project posts a status update. Buried in hundreds of lines of technical jargon is this)

IA!! IA!! SIS BOOM BA! OLD ONES!! OLD ONES!! RAH-RAH-RAH!!

YOG-SOTHOTH!!

(Followed by:)

To summarize, there should be no harmful side-effects from this project. – RecklessPrudence

“Jenkins… I do understand the natural frustration with our sponsors not reading the technical data they pay for, but…” Paulson handed over the page with the highlighted passage. “Was this absolutely necessary?”

Jenkins

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Challenge #00479 - A104: Works of Synchronicity

If there’s one thing the internet as a whole can aspire to be, it’s infinite monkeys on infinite typewriters. – RecklessPrudence

Communication has always been the barrier to creativity. But now those barriers were only limited by language. And even then, there were translation apps.

Such apps were very useful to Archivaas Nel, whose job it was to trawl the archives and file each and every item. Cross-referencing, of course, in case someone wanted to trace a work to its

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Challenge #00478 - A103: Fecocephalopathy

“It occurs to me…your inability to use the brain evolution granted you is none of my concern.” – RecklessPrudence

[AN: In case you’re wondering, it’s pronounced “fee co seff a lop ath ee”. The medical state of having shit for brains]

“Heads up, I got me a creeper,” Shayde announced as she parked herself uncomfortably close to him.

There would be no answers forthcoming from Shayde, who acted as if everyone

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temple-ait: spacemuffinz: temple-ait: Have a cute pouting Rabbit while I'm still struggling with this whole 'drawing style' mystery XD...

temple-ait:

spacemuffinz:

temple-ait:

Have a cute pouting Rabbit while I’m still struggling with this whole ‘drawing style’ mystery XD how draw :c

THIS IS SO CUTE OH MY GOD

“stupid spine never lets me have no fun. i only wanted to pet the bears.”

Okay I couldn’t just leave that XDDD

I love how The Spine is all roughed up in this. Like you KNOW he got in there and rescued his sister from the bears before she

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Challenge #00477 - A102: Open Source Enterprise

If you want to build a space ship, don’t tax people to collect the money and don’t command them around to do tasks, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the universe. -Antoine de Saint-Exupery, paraphrasing. (c/- RecklessPrudence)

[AN: Yeah, I’m pretty darn certain that if you crowd-funded space travel, you would never need to look for money ever again. You’d have people paying for the privilege of working on it, too]

Hi.

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elubviq: expert-jumper: unscinfinity: expert-jumper: It is the year 2046. The time has come for the annual Blog Inspection. Armed...

elubviq:

expert-jumper:

unscinfinity:

expert-jumper:

It is the year 2046. The time has come for the annual Blog Inspection. Armed android wardens begin to arrive at the homes of the country’s prisoners who were once called citizens. A warden knocks on a ramshackle door. It is answered by an old man, bedraggled, starving, weary. The robotic guard’s abdominal display screen flickers to life with the image of a popular post on tumblr. “This has to be on everyone’s blog at

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