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Myths Illogical

A 190-post collection

Challenge #00954-B223: Careful How You Wish...

(Discussing being granted superpowers, Person #2 doesn’t want them)
Person #1: I’m sorry, but whether you want to or not… this is something that is going to happen. The next time you fall asleep-
Person #2: Then I just. /Won’t/. Sleep.
Person #3 (Full of cheerful sarcasm): That sounds like a solid long-term plan!

Irde glared at Bianca. “No. No. This isn’t a solid wish.”

“You did use the words ‘I wish’, said the Djinn. What she had been doing an a Chianti bottle had to be anyone’s guess. “And your wish is my command.”

“Ah! I didn’t just say ‘I wish’, I said ‘sometimes I wish’. The qualifier itself means that it’s not a permanent state of wish.”

“Is there such a thing? I don’t think wishing is a state of being…”

“You’re not helping, Bianca.”

The Djinn blushed. In so far as a creature made of night and smoke could blush. “Er,” she said. “I… um… didn’t hear the ‘sometimes’ part.”

“Can I retroactively wish you had better hearing?” Irde tried. “Trust me. Nobody really wants to wake up with that kind of power. Okay? Can you un-grant things now?”

The Djinn frowned, brought out a thick tome and paged through it. “Uhm… er… actually,” flip, flip, flip. “Yes. I can do that for you. If you wish that I had better hearing in the past. That creates an alternate reality where the -ah- misheard wish is never granted. And I can make sure you remember this little side-reality. For free.”

“Sounds like a deal to me,” sighed Irde. “I really wish you had better hearing in the past.”

[Muse food remaining: 21. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!]

Challenge #00950-B219: Sailor Fey

Grab another one!

http://thepreciousthing.tumblr.com/post/121702150607/finding-flight-okay-but-imagine-a-medieval

Most sailors feared to go near the Siren Pass. Beyond, they whispered, were shores of gold where the waves broke with pearls and gems as sea foam. Where untold riches and wealth awaited for anyone who could actually survive the pass. Here, there be mermaids. They decorate the rocks with foolhardy sailors who chance too close and fall victim to their song. Their bones, anyway. All of them picked clean and bleached

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Challenge #00936-B205: An Ace Up Her Sleeve

(Since we can do this, let’s try a different post)

Pick a prompt from one of these:

http://thepreciousthing.tumblr.com/post/121702150607/finding-flight-okay-but-imagine-a-medieval

“You fool,” crowed Master Magistar. “You thought that underwater level was a simple defensive measure!” He cackled in his usual, evil manner. “I filled that labyrinth with pure Love Potion! You cannot hope to defeat your one, true love.”

“Watch me,” said Aiana the Mighty unsheathed her rapier point. “Have you nothing else to defend yourself with,

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Challenge #00932-B201: We Are Magic

Person #1: C'mon!

Person #2: No.

Person #1: Aww. Please?

Person #2: No. There’s no such thing.

Person #1: But you’ll never know if you have magic powers until you try!

Person #2: sigh Fine. Abracada-[Words in a dead tongue, strange lights from nowhere and levitating off the floor]

What Debbie and Angela didn’t know, of course, was that it was all a trick. A light show, mostly. And her limited skills in telekinesis for the levitating objects.

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Challenge #00931-B200: Bunkmate From Hell

In the name of it’s late and eventually we both want to sleep, I agree to that deal.

“You ever really think about cats?” asked Sam. “You know. Really
think about cats? Like they’re a solid animal, but they act like a fluid and they can expand to fill the space they want to take up…. And
the super-fluffy ones always shock you when they’re wet because they’re all like those hairless skeleton things underneath all that

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Challenge #00925-B194: The Feel When No Sex Life

http://thentheresthisspazz.tumblr.com/post/123284811011/mythological-creature-aus

Last one!

If you’ve already done them all, your challenge is to write a prequel to one of them

[AN: Last one, haimaee​ :3 ]

The social scene is really fucking awkward. So many of them expect so much of you and you never know who wants what until you’re rejected. And it hurts. It hurts worth than starving.

I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I really don’t. I come

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Challenge #00924-B193: Witnessed

http://thentheresthisspazz.tumblr.com/post/123284811011/mythological-creature-aus

Doot doot.

If you’ve already done all 7 by now, your challenge is to cross over two of the prompts into one.

[AN: OK for future reference and my current incompetence, I’m using a checklist.

[ ] (In/Suc)cubus
[X] Siren
[X] Werewolf
[X] Cursed animal
[X] Dragon
[X] Frog
[X] Vampire

thank you for your patience with me. Oh, and haimaee? Here’s more]

“No. Just no, okay? Francis Drake did not write

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Challenge #00923-B192: Unblinking Stare

http://thentheresthisspazz.tumblr.com/post/123284811011/mythological-creature-aus

Aaand again!

[AN: OK for future reference and my current incompetence, I’m using a checklist.

[ ] (In/Suc)cubus
[X] Siren
[X] Werewolf
[X] Cursed animal
[X] Dragon
[X] Frog
[ ] Vampire

thank you for your patience with me. Oh, and haimaee? Here’s more]

When you get down to it, there’s lots of things worse than being turned into a lizard. Bearded dragon, to be precise. Just so you know.

You know, once the

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Challenge #00922-B191: Smoke Gets in Your Eyes

http://thentheresthisspazz.tumblr.com/post/123284811011/mythological-creature-aus

Keep going!

[AN: OK for future reference and my current incompetence, I’m using a checklist.

[ ] (In/Suc)cubus
[X] Siren
[X] Werewolf
[ ] Cursed animal
[X] Dragon
[X] Frog
[ ] Vampire

thank you for your patience with me. Oh, and haimaee? Here’s more]

He always came with the smell of smoke. Sharp and acrid. “Good morning, Princess.”

Emily automatically began making is Grande Soy Latte with a shot of chilli and three shots of caramel.

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Challenge #00921-B190: Heavenly Harmonies

http://thentheresthisspazz.tumblr.com/post/123284811011/mythological-creature-aus

Pick another one!

[AN: OK for future reference and my current incompetence, I’m using a checklist.

[ ] (In/Suc)cubus
[X] Siren
[X] Werewolf
[ ] Cursed animal
[ ] Dragon
[X] Frog
[ ] Vampire

thank you for your patience with me. Oyeah. And it’s not going to be Tailor Swift.]

“It’s all goooooooooooooooooooooooone to ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust…” Amy leaned her head back to rinse out the lather. “The mall shop’s a derelict skeleton, the disco’s dead

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