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A 4676-post collection

Challenge #00556 - A181: Mwa-hahahahaha

Mad scientists are real, lurking in academia.  Sure, they may not wield death rays and threaten the populace, but when a presentation ending in “Today, Australia! Tomorrow, THE WORLD!” receives thunderous applause, and your adviser’s name is literally Dr. Fatal, you begin to realize that your childhood dream of showing them, SHOWING THEM ALL is more realizable than you thought…..

Doctor Fatal was still giggling as she stepped away from the podium. That was a good sign.

“I’m almost obligated to do this,” said Dr Fatal. She pointed and sang, “You’re a me-ga-lo-may-nee-ac! You’re a me-ga-lo-may-nee-ac!”

“When your name’s Yvil, you gotta do a few things. It’s obligatory. Especially with a supervisor Fatal.”

“You’ve still got the bigger hurdle of getting the government to agree with it.”

Yvil made a face. “Urgh. Yuck. We all know the Australian government doesn’t do anything sensible until America does it. Maybe I should convince them.”

“I suppose robots programmed to quell opposition are out of the question?” joked Fatal.

“Yeah, nah. You can’t get the funding.”

Which turned out to be the best joke of the evening.

[Muse food remaining: 12. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!]

Challenge #00555 - A180: Essential Developments

Ridiculous fact of the day: We went to the moon before we thought to put wheels on suitcases.

Some things are essential for cogniscent development. The ability to control heat is one. Civilisation in any form is another.

It is impossible to have a planet where the entire population are dancers. People must eat. People must learn. People must make insipid sitcoms and nobody knows why.

But some things… don’t always happen in the correct order.

“Wait,”

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Challenge #00554 - A179: The Second-Unkindest Cut

“Aliens do not understand papercuts.”

The death world menace flinched, howling in agony. “Idonotfirkinbelievethis!” It dropped the weapon it was holding. “Agodsdamnedpapercut. Afterallthis, agodsdamnedpapercut…”

The huddling assembly of survivors blinked in confusion. This creature had survived toxic gas, lacerations, contusions, concussion, shock, awe, and extremes of temperatures… and now it was halted by a relatively minor injury to its apparently thick hide.

It wasn’t even bleeding, there.

Yet the creature stopped. Retreated,

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Challenge #00553 - A178: Monstrous, Not a Monster

(based on your SPG/MiP crossover)

Francoeur’s initial efforts to help with the wounded, being generally scared of the soldiers, figuring out he can carry tons of resources and singing to everyone.

They still ran the cabaret, though it was starting to be more of a hospice and partially a hotel. More and more soldiers came in, and more and more saw him in all his monstrous glory.

Nothing gets a soldier reaching for their weapons faster than a seven-foot-tall flea.

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Challenge #00552 - A177: Mischief at Work

Pretending to be an exhibit at the waxworks museum.

The real trick, of course, is to blink or change poses when no-one is watching. Or, in the case of this waxwork exhibit, adopt a pose when someone approached.

She had hers already. Propped up at the writing desk and staring at the blinking cursor. In some, she actually dropped off to sleep like that, and nobody noticed the difference.

At least she didn’t snore sitting up.

But this time, she

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Challenge #00551 - A176: Party Life

Person 1: Didn’t you blow up a planet somehow while you having a year long kegger?

Person 2: First; it was merely rendered uninhabitable. Second; the party lasted two and a half years. — RecklessPrudence

There are generally two ways to react when one is the last of one’s kind.

Kirov chose the other one.

He had but one life to live, though it was a long one, and elected to enjoy every last moment. He travelled from world to world,

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Challenge #00550 - A175: Black-boxing It

Taken from an author talking about a piece of tech in their setting:

They’ve tried reverse engineering the displacement engine before. It goes a little like this:

Your moon is now a pretzel.

Your research is invalid. – RecklessPrudence

“So what is it?”

“I can’t figure it out,” said Helba, getting her facts out in the open. “I know what it does, it makes the gravity in this… place…” Station, ship&

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Challenge #00549 - A174: Absence of Wenching

http://yoquinto.tumblr.com/post/78790240270/okay-but-a-story-about-an-asexual-pirate-who-gets

I really should stop sending these t you every time I find them, sorry.

[AN: Don’t you bloody dare stop! I love getting prompts FYI the post isn’t there any more, but I found this one thanks to searching: http://silentmercenary.tumblr.com/post/84994393370/yoquinto-okay-but-a-story-about-an-asexual :) If anyone knows where Yoquinto has gone, please let them know that their imaginings have become a thing]

In any bar, tavern, or lowly dive,

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Challenge #00548 - A173: Maybe a Not-Too-Distant Future

“It’s pronounced X”

“I thought it was Y?”

“No, that’s exactly the sort of mistake I’d expect from someone like you. I’m a /real/ fan, I’ve been an expert on this since before you were born.”

“Actually, it is Y, the kid was right, and you’ve no call to go around acting like that to people.”

“And who are you?”

“I’m the author.”

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Challenge #00547 - A172: Need to Know

Prompt: That trick where you come up behind someone and pop a paper bag to make them jump, most often portrayed when someone is working on something that could (but probably won’t) explode.

[AN: I must have hit a nerve on the Interwebs, yesterday. Twenty-three notes on one silly story because of an equally silly side-fling. Must resist the temptation to do that from now on]

To the Galactic Alliance, need-to-know information is information that every citizen, denizen and in denizen

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Challenge #00546 - A171: Witch on Trial

“I don’t curse people, I bless everyone around them.”

The court murmured.

“It’s stated that you cursed Goodie Carswater and her garden wilted.”

“I did no such thing. And it’s a well-known fact that her little tearaways widdle on her wisterias.”

More murmuring. Apparently the only person who didn’t know this was Goodie Carswater. Who also believed that her sons could do no wrong.

“It’s also stated that you cursed Thou-shalt-not-covet Jones

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Challenge #00545 - A170: Acapella

It was a companionable quiet, with the rhythmic “whud, whud, whud” of the engine accompanied by various tapping and clanking of everyone doing their jobs. Eventually everyone’s noises gradually synced with the main beat and suddenly the Lion King happened.

“I swear sir, I left for four seconds and they started a musical number" 

Goryx stared out at the rows of humans - still working, of course - as they continued to sing.

"TILL WE FIND OUR PLACE,

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Challenge #00544 - A169: The Fine Print

If you’re going to make a year-long agreement, you’d better be sure you know whose year you’re using.

“What do you mean I’m still under contract?” Terry demanded. She tried not to make a fist around all her vital documents. “It says five years. It’s been five years. And forty-eight hours, and that’s only because it took that long to get all the forms filled out.”

“I’

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Challenge #00544 - A169: The Un-Secret

Dunno if you’ll like this one, but I ran across it:

“The thing about evolving on a death world is that you don’t really realize you’re doing so until you get the chance to leave it. Up to that point the presence of carnivorous monsters, venomous micropredators, extreme climatic conditions, geological instability, the most lethal cocktail of microbial and viral life forms in the galaxy and of course the crushing gravity, seemed entirely natural. Until we left Earth

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Challenge #00543 - A168: Sufficiently Advanced... Rituals

[In a discussion about technically-proficient people (of any subdivision) and the lies-to-children told to those they have to interact with]

I think we know why wizards just act all cryptic and stuff…

I imagine they had to keep explaining their knowledge of the arcane to the average peasant over and over again until they just got fed up with it.

And that’s how we get wizards, mages and sorcerers who seem to delight in not giving a straight answer. – RecklessPrudence

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