Amalgam Universe

Challenge #01529-D068: Crisis in the Wee Small Hours

You'd be surprised who you find in your family tree. -- Knitnan

Rael had not expected his genes to turn up in any of the current series of released Faiize infants. The one currently in its relaxation tank was, according to the gene scan, twenty-five percent his. Kint, the primary genetic contributor, had a whopping sixty-three percent of his personal genome involved.

There was a small community of sudden parentals, lost without a manual, working out how to parent a Faiize without inherent mental programming. Thus, the infant's tank had all kinds of medical equipment attached to it so the anxious genetic donors could monitor everything they needed to monitor. Shayde had hung a clockwork mobile over it that played Brahm's Lullabye.

She had also managed to graft herself onto this tiny variant of a family tree. Much like a sometimes-symbiotic parasite.

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Challenge #01526-D065: Goods and Services

Oh fuck that noise, screw that sound, hump that harmonic, bang that bass, fornicate with that frequency and fuck me! -- RecklessPrudence

In all of Galactic Society, the most alarming feature to most human societies is the simple fact that sex work and mental therapy have homogenised into a harmonious whole. Humans have had an interesting relationship with the mechanics of their own reproduction and, despite some centuries af adjustment, are still hung up about it.

Case in point, most of the

Challenge #01525-D064: A Powerful Talisman

Call it what you will, Linus, Blankie, Comfort Rug. A square or rectangle of worked fibre, knitted, crocheted out of bits of yarn something soft and warm to hang on to in times of stress. -- Knitnan

"Honestly, Farraq, this is the slowest evacuation in the known universe."

"Sorry, boss," the human had something colourful bundled under one arm. "Can't leave anywhere without my Snoog."

P'treth boggled at the human merc as they writhed their way through an airlock made for a

Challenge #01523-D062: A Grievous Mistake

Matters have left "pear-shaped" and have escalated to the eldritch topographies of a taco warped through a tesseract. -- RecklessPrudence

"I regret to inform Her Majestrix that matters have gone... er... pear-shaped."

The seneschal glared down hir nose at Brekkis. " Adjudant Brekkis... Matters have left "pear-shaped" and have escalated to the eldritch topographies of a taco warped through a tesseract. Matters are so beyond "pear-shaped" that we've had to hire human mercenaries, Brekkis. And further... the human mercenaries have captured some of

Challenge #01522-D061: With a Knack for Mimicry

http://marlynnofmany.tumblr.com/post/156605690661

Aliens that do not understand how well humans can mimic some noises. -- Gallifreya

When headed into uncharted, or barely charted territory, when facing danger, it is best to have at least one human aboard your ship. Yes, they are frightening deathworlders, but they also understand this and endeavour to be less frightening so they can pack-bond with you. They are also, and the K'veth are discovering, prone to annoying pranks.

Bob could impersonate any noise

Challenge #01521-D060: Perspective Post Peril

(Couldn't make this entirely gender-neutral. I suspect the terms do not exist in English. Although I know half a dozen ways to say one of them in various fictional universes, one of them might be the correct English form of address. As for a gender-neutral term for the person in charge of a Duchy (apart from the major-domo or seneschal or whatever who's actually running it all... idk)

[Person #1]: (VERY full of themselves, has been nothing but irritating, has no training,

Challenge #01520-D059: Lost and Found

[Person #1]: Spectro-analysis of the ship dates it as having been in orbit here for slightly more than three hundred million years.

[Person #2]: They built shit to last back in the Paleozoic, huh?

(your choice on whether Person #1's results bear any resemblance to reality) -- RecklessPrudence

Tel swore under her breath and worked her fastest to get that comment out of the feed to the rest of the Galactic Alliance. One cut, and Ambassador Shayde's glib and unnecessary remark was

Challenge #01519-D058: Watch What You Say

[Person #1]: (after describing the expedition) Won't be any fighting or danger, just research

[Person #2]: (who's seen this shit before) Yes, it will be totally safe. Nothing can go wrong. At least it won't be raining.

[Person #2]: You could just as well held up a sign that says "Fuck Murphy" on it, and expect less trouble. -- RecklessPrudence

"It's an exploratory mission into uninhabited territory. The entire system is incapable of hosting life. What could go wrong?"

"O Powers... you

Challenge #01512-D051: Fascinating...

For the "Humans are space orcs": Aliens can only focus on one thing at a time. They're far more efficient because they hyperfocus and complete any task in a far shorter amount of time. So humans penchant of talking/humming/listening to music while working is both distracting and baffling. -- Anon Guest

Half the crew were watching the ship's human in their segregated kitchen. Terran music blared at maximum allowed volume, and the human sang slightly louder. Inside the quarantine zone,

Challenge #01507-D046: In Memorium

No matter how I go, I want it reported that I drowned in moonlight, strangled by my own bra. - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Official reports be damned. There was a way she wanted to be remembered, and that is how those who loved her reported it. All over the world. Even in the news. They named the official cause, but added, "she wanted it known that she drowned in moonlight, strangled by her own bra."

It was poetry, and it persisted.

Challenge #01504-D043: Puzzling Piece

“And when you’re young you want to fit in. Hell, I still want to fit in with certain [sophonts], but as you get older you get a little more discriminating.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Even when he didn't have the words for it, Rael knew that he was different from his creche sibs. They were able to do more, work more efficiently. They didn't need as much of the hosts of chemicals they regularly added to Rael's mostly-liquid body. They

Challenge #01504-D043: Self-lost Man

“I don’t feel very much like Pooh today,“ said Pooh.

“There there,” said Piglet. “I’ll bring you tea and honey until you do.” -- Anon Guest

Ax'and'l found his human business partner in an odd position in the hallway. His legs were up the wall, and the rest of his body was sprawled across the floor. "You are not due for Silly Season, yet. Are you unwell?"

"I'm not sure. I'm not feelin' myself."

"In a public area? I should

Challenge #01503-D042: One Dull Afternoon in an Ambassadorial Office

“I feel I’m very sane about how crazy I am.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Rael slowly turned to glare at Ambassador Shayde. She had said this out of the blue, apropos of nothing, and continued browsing on her personal screens as if nothing had ever happened. He took an educated guess, "Quote of the day?"

"Twitter feed," said Shayde. "That's definitely sommat I missed out on. One hundred and forty letters tae say somethin' cool. Brevity bein' th' soul o'

Challenge #01502-D041: Inconvenienced

“In my opinion, a problem derails your life and an inconvenience is not being able to get a nice seat on the un-derailed train.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

"This is an enormous problem," opined the Ambassador for Greater Deregulation (Second West). "ANd if we have a problem, then you're going to have a problem."

This sounded like a threat... but the logic behind it escaped Drixal. "I beg your pardon," she said. "I was under the impression that you needed vital

Challenge #01500-D039: Guarded Mundanity

“There is no point at which you can say, ‘Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap'.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Success is the closest thing there is to perpetual motion. One begins by striving for it. Once it is obtained once, the struggle becomes to maintain it. After that, success becomes a higher rung. Higher and higher. Almost impossible to attain. With more people admiring and watching, there are higher standards from everyone.

Only those who

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A 2280-post collection

Challenge #01529-D068: Crisis in the Wee Small Hours

Challenge #01526-D065: Goods and Services

Challenge #01525-D064: A Powerful Talisman

Challenge #01523-D062: A Grievous Mistake

Challenge #01522-D061: With a Knack for Mimicry

Challenge #01521-D060: Perspective Post Peril

Challenge #01520-D059: Lost and Found

Challenge #01519-D058: Watch What You Say

Challenge #01512-D051: Fascinating...

Challenge #01507-D046: In Memorium

Challenge #01504-D043: Puzzling Piece

Challenge #01504-D043: Self-lost Man

Challenge #01503-D042: One Dull Afternoon in an Ambassadorial Office

Challenge #01502-D041: Inconvenienced

Challenge #01500-D039: Guarded Mundanity