Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #00484 - A109: Someone Said it

A.
Light Year.
Is.
The distance.
That light.
Travels.
In a year. – RecklessPrudence

[AN: Huzzah! I’m not the only person annoyed by this]

“So we travelled six thousand light years in less than an hour?” asked the tourist.

“Technically,” allowed the Hitchhiker. “Wormholes are more of a shortc–”

“We’ve been taking light years in minutes! Why aren’t I any younger?” the tourist guffawed at his own

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Dear dudebros who think feminism is irrelevant

stfueverything:

Every time you complain about a girl who’s too skinny, I want you to remember the time you made fun of a fat girl for being fat.

Every time you complain about having to pay for a date, I want you to remember the time you said the gender pay gap was a myth. 

Every time you complain about a girl wearing too much makeup, I want you to remember the time you called a girl ugly.

Every time you

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Challenge #00483 - A108: Yo Daddy SO Dense...

Gentlemen, behold, the singularity of stupid. – RecklessPrudence

[AN: I’ve already spoken out against mental ablism and received crap for it. No help - just crap. I feel like I’m walking on a fairy floss tightrope with incipient rain overhead, BUT - st*pid is an ablist slur please help us all find something else]

“O divine Powers, that is such a dense idea…”

“No denser than yo Daddy.”

“Yeah, well yo

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Challenge #00482 - A107: What is Real?

Don’t you smile at me… that’s not even a real smile! It’s just a bunch of teeth playing with my mind! – RecklessPrudence

The robot, trying to please, returned to a neutral expression display. “My apologies,” it said. “I am built to serve. How may I help you, today?”

Aisha sighed. Of all the bodies she could have hauled into her life raft, it had to be one of the service ‘bots from the

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aromaveil: Please give this tiny baby platypus notes. I don't like seeing the hateful comments directed at me from the Men's Rights blogs...

aromaveil:

Please give this tiny baby platypus notes. I don’t like seeing the hateful comments directed at me from the Men’s Rights blogs on tumblr so if this baby platypus gets over 36 notes i will be okay and i will see people reblogging this platypus instead of mean things

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Challenge #00481 - A106: Lead Balloon

I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates when he said “I drank what?” — RecklessPrudence

Jones had had enough. “Actually, he said that he owed a rooster to Asclepius, the Greek god of healing, and asked his friend to pay the debt. He knew damn well he was drinking hemlock and chugged it like it was cheap beer.”

The rest of the meeting stared at her.

“I’m tired of historically inaccurate jokes, okay? Socrates was a bad-ass and nobody

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Challenge #00480 - A105: Proof of Reading

(New scientific project posts a status update. Buried in hundreds of lines of technical jargon is this)

IA!! IA!! SIS BOOM BA! OLD ONES!! OLD ONES!! RAH-RAH-RAH!!

YOG-SOTHOTH!!

(Followed by:)

To summarize, there should be no harmful side-effects from this project. – RecklessPrudence

“Jenkins… I do understand the natural frustration with our sponsors not reading the technical data they pay for, but…” Paulson handed over the page with the highlighted passage. “Was this absolutely necessary?”

Jenkins

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Challenge #00479 - A104: Works of Synchronicity

If there’s one thing the internet as a whole can aspire to be, it’s infinite monkeys on infinite typewriters. – RecklessPrudence

Communication has always been the barrier to creativity. But now those barriers were only limited by language. And even then, there were translation apps.

Such apps were very useful to Archivaas Nel, whose job it was to trawl the archives and file each and every item. Cross-referencing, of course, in case someone wanted to trace a work to its

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Challenge #00478 - A103: Fecocephalopathy

“It occurs to me…your inability to use the brain evolution granted you is none of my concern.” – RecklessPrudence

[AN: In case you’re wondering, it’s pronounced “fee co seff a lop ath ee”. The medical state of having shit for brains]

“Heads up, I got me a creeper,” Shayde announced as she parked herself uncomfortably close to him.

There would be no answers forthcoming from Shayde, who acted as if everyone

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