InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12629 posts

Challenge #00588 - A213: Explaining a Lot

Was trying to figure a way to rephrase this, but I reckon it’s probably best to send it to you in its original form: “(s)he/ze had a troubled childhood” == “They had a troubled evolution…” (a lot of the questions were me) – recklessprudence

“…and this is Ambassador Shayde. Her species had a difficult evolution.”

The assembled welcome committee aahed and nodded.

“Must ye do tha’ every time we go somewhere?” Shayde murmured.

“You don’t look very human, so the answer is ‘yes’,” said Rael. “Not very many non-human species are insane, so…”

“Humans are no’ insane,” Shayde denied. “’S nobody else understandin’ what makes sense tae us.”

“Explain figure skating to me? How about base jumping? Or parkour… How about - why pole dancing continued to have a stigma against it for two hundred years? Why did your kind create an entire field of anti-science.”

“Awrigh’ awrigh’… Ye got a point with the Creationists. But every planets’ got it’s nutbars, aye?”

“Not as many as Earth,” sighed Rael. “Your planet has enough nutbars to stock a health store.”

Shayde laughed at that. “Aye. An’ enough fruitcakes tae feed Christmas. Fine. But do me a favour an’ point out the other nutbars. I like tae collect.”

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atrophy-of-life: rifleisfine: sexecutive-outcums: failedsuicideclub: Hero. This isn't even the whole story. They told him he couldn't...

atrophy-of-life:

rifleisfine:

sexecutive-outcums:

failedsuicideclub:

Hero.

This isn’t even the whole story. They told him he couldn’t go because they had no way of getting him there. So he walked outside when they weren’t looking and took a fucking bus. The next time he was seen was on Sword Beach, ith all his medals pinned to his chest.

brb, crying

The fucking Wehrmacht couldn’t stop him from hitting that beach the first time, what the fuck did the care

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Challenge #00587 - A212: Confusing Hilarity

Someone being chased by a goose while others laugh too hard to help.

The humans saw her coming in to the launch pole.

“Up! Up! Up!” They called, using their fleshy hands to gesture the same thought. “Danger! Up!”

She scrambled for the little platform before she dared look down. There, in one of the grazing paddocks, one of the humans’ domesticated avians was chasing a young human keet. Kid.

It was a large bird. Semi-aquatic, judging

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The cover… evolves I’m going to have a hard time NOT using bleeding font for the title because it all looks SO...

The cover… evolves

I’m going to have a hard time NOT using bleeding font for the title because it all looks SO cheesy-horror-flick… which is exactly what I’m aiming for :D

I was having a really bad day until this turned up in my in-box. Now I’m stoked :)

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Challenge #00586 - A211: Imaginary Union 1475

Monthly union meeting of trolls, ogres, and TUTBs (Things Under the Bed).

“All right, all right. Let’s keep this in order so we can all be back in our haunts before sunset.”

Grumble grumble mumble.

“If you don’t wanna be here, you can always skip on your fees,” threatened their president, Gruuh.

“Point of order,” said Oogle.

Sigh. “Yes?”

“Fees are hard to obtain. Kids are scared of less&

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coelasquid: thedaintysquid: semioticharuspook: I fuCKING LOVE THIS ELVIS GIF fucking floor guy killing it on the sax the fuckers on the...

coelasquid:

thedaintysquid:

semioticharuspook:

I fuCKING LOVE THIS ELVIS GIF

  • fucking floor guy killing it on the sax
  • the fuckers on the ladder
  • jimmy-bob in the back dancing like a prospector who found gold
  • the motherfucker who just appears swinging a trombone like he’s fucking fighting a swarm of bees
  • and fucking Elvis hobbling around like he lost his crutches

reblogging this for the caption because I almost spit out my drink.

This first season of Oz was a doozy.

This video

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X! It is dark. You are likely to be eaten by a gr...OH COME ON NOT THIS CRAP AGAIN!

(#00585 - A210)

“What do you mean, you can’t shadow-jump us out of here?” demanded Rael.

“One: Ye wouldnae like it even if I could. Two: it’s no just dark, it's fook-off dark. I need an actual shadow. An’ three:” a click and a glamour-light that only cast imaginary photons to illuminate a young woman with blood-red hair that fell into ringlets. “I’m no’ a shadow elemental when it's

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princessskittybot: Bird watching with the Babybots Hummingbird = tiny fast bird Chicken = food bird Duck = quack bird Goose = very loud and...

princessskittybot:

Bird watching with the Babybots

Hummingbird = tiny fast bird

Chicken = food bird

Duck = quack bird

Goose = very loud and very angry quack bird

Peacock = what

Finch: teeny tiny clockwork bird

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Challenge #00584 - A209: Don't Speak

Challenge: No dialogue. Any ‘verse

What struck her at first was the alienness of the world. Even before she had to ponder how she got here or what ‘normal’ was supposed to be.

Everything had right-angles to it. The things that were not cubes of… stuff… were flat, two dimensional objects, things that looked like paper props from a tinkertoy town, or moving creatures also seemingly made of cubes.

But it was real. She was there. And she

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ask me thinnnnnggggssssssss ask me ask me

amongthegentlymad:

Reblog If You Are A Writer Of Any Kind And Want To Be Asked These Questions

A: What do you write?  Fanfiction, original fiction, nonfiction, articles, songs, poems, essays, plays, what?

B: How often do you write?

C: Who is your favorite character of your own?  Who is your favorite character created by somebody else?  Why?

D: If you had the choice of going without writing forever or going without dinner forever, which one would you choose?

E: Have you ever

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Challenge #00583 - A208: Big, Blue and Mostly Harmless

Challenge prompt: Try a MLP / Monster in Paris crossover WITHOUT Fluttershy being the one that shows everyone he’s really a very sweet giant flea.

Cornered. Trapped. Pinned. And no doubt about to be eaten by the Beast from the portal, Rarity hunkered in place and shrieked.

One of its four arms reached inevitably towards her…

…and began carefully combing her mane.

“Jolie petit poney,” cooed a voice that could easily have come from Heaven itself. “Vous êtes perdu?

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