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Challenge #01833-E009: Revenge is Purring

If you truly hate someone give them a baby bear. Comment from Historical source. Nobody mentioned Bears just get big. But what if you give them a pregnant female house cat? -- Anon Guest

Across societies, across worlds, there are things that could be counted as gifts - but definitely aren't. Drum kits for the hated one's children. A bear cub. A baby ape. A dragon's egg. All of those and more can only be called trouble. And then there is the coup de grace of malevolent gifts for a despised individual.

A pregnant housecat. Specifically, a fluffy pregnant housecat. Which makes it difficult to tell that said cat is even pregnant at all.

Sadistic observers know well what happens next. The cat will have her litter in a secret place, safe and secure for her kittens. The new owner will not be immediately aware that they are even there. Cats, of course, are stealthy predators that can also be prey. It's in their vested interest to conceal their helpless young. Then the owner suddenly finds out that they have four to six cute, fluffy little kittens of doubtful parentage. But they are adorable.

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Challenge #01817-D356: Adulting Test

Clean up inspired by looming arrival of Parents visiting. -- Anon Guest

It took two weeks for Amber's first place away from home to become a fucking dump. And the following three weeks only made it worse. It was easier to buy new things than it was to look for the old ones. The paths most trodden were the only places where the floor was visible. It was waist high, it was smelly, and it needed to be gone inside five hours.

Challenge #01807-D346: For the Future

Political hot air. the Other candidate is always the worse thing that could happen. Unless of course they win your vote. Same Old, Same Old. Then someone manages to prove that Political Promises are actually an enforceable contract. -- Anon Guest

They say that a child's wish is the most powerful thing in the world. And it can be. In the mouth of the right child. But circumstances have to be very, very specific.

Seth was the adopted child of aggressively pro-life

Challenge #01806-D345: A Mundane Permanence

You see them everywhere, sausage sizzles, Craft Stalls, selling stuff to passers by - raising funds for Good Causes. Making the World a better place a few dollars at a time. -- Anon Guest

[AN: Less and less as various peeps reduce the abilities of these folks to do so]

When they came for the cake stalls, I said nothing because I was on a succession of diets. When they came for the sausage sizzle, I said nothing because vegetables were meant

Challenge #01805-D344: This Little Light...

Sometimes we can't do much to make things better, rather like emptying the ocean with a teaspoon. But, even a small candle gives light. -- Anon Guest

You'd think it was impossible to be cold when you're watching your entire life go up in flames. But Sandra was. She'd woken up with someone dragging her out of the little wooden cottage that she had spent her life savings on, and kept her life mementoes in. Everything she owned. Everything she'd made.

Someone

Challenge #01793-D332: Hello, Goodbye...

“When in doubt, push buttons. Eventually something will happen.”

”Noo! Don’t!” -- TheDragonsFlame

"Rabbit," said The Spine severely, gripping his sister's wrist and preventing her from interacting with the console. "Pressing random buttons is how we got into this mess in the first place."

"Well s-ss-something's g-gotta get us back to K-k-k-Kazooland."

"Uhm," said Hatchworth. "We have... com-pa-ny."

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Challenge #01792-D331: No Werewolves on the Moon

... here’s a question: If werewolves become... wolves... under the full moon, what would happen if you put one ON the moon? (Assuming compatible life support) -- TheDragonsFlame

Welcome to Tsiolkovski crater. No lycanthropes need apply. The second sentence had been added by a graffiti artist of no repute and was faded in the unrelenting sunlight. Lupe bunny-hopped past it on the way to the colony.

If this was what passed for jokes in this space-town...

She found the nearest airlock easily

Challenge #01791-D330: Reserved Seating

Exorcist/Psychic: “Oh spirit that dwells in this place, why have you not moved on?” … He says that he wants you to keep him updated on [TV show] since he died before it ended.” -- TheDragonsFlame

It was a nice little house. Cosy without being cramped. Light and airy without being exposed and drafty. It was, in essence, the last place anyone would expect to be haunted. And yet it was.

The living room was always rearranged on Tuesday nights, with the

Challenge #01777-D316: Worth Living Well

Sometimes, someone with a life-threatening condition decides, "What the heck! I'm going to have Fun!" -- Anon Guest

The prognosis sucked. The good news, according to the doctors, was that with expensive drugs and even more expensive therapy, Jeremy could stretch his painful last days by maybe three months.

Six months in increasing pain versus nine in absolute agony. What a fun choice.

"You know what?" said Jeremy. "Fuck it. I'm not going to spend my last days in medical agony. I'm

Challenge #01772-D311: The New Landlord

You once wrote an Instant about a Company owning 99.99% of the World. What they wouldn't realise is "If you own it, you have to fix it. Lousy Hospital, Education, Roads, transport. It's Your responsibility. enjoy!" government retires. -- Knitnan

When you've just bought the world, you never expect it to be a fixer-upper. The previous administration neglected to mention things like noisy and annoying tennants. Rising damp. The fact that the heating needed to be fixed. And they had the

Challenge #01771-D310: Necessary Feature Creep

The single most useful command on a computer: ctrl/cmnd+Z -- TheDragonsFlame

Everything is the result of laziness. People invented crank calculators because they didn't want to go through the mathematics themselves. People invented computers because the living ones took a little too long to bust the Enigma code. And programming code was invented because people were sick and tired of having to translate everything into ones and zeroes.

Code editors were invented to keep things straight and highlight mistakes.

Other

Challenge #01761-D300: Who You Choose to Be

Sometimes an actor takes on a role that leads to consequences. In remembrance of someone most of you have never heard of: William Boyd aka Hopalong Cassidy. Children's hero of the 1930's/40's. He refused to be other than a hero to them. -- Knitnan

Albert Dennis was a rogue. Everyone who knew him knew that. He was a renowned philanderer, frequent drunkard, and all-around party boy. He would lie, cheat, and steal his way into whatever he wanted with no regard

Challenge #01757-D296: Flinging For Science

Bored Science class discovers Trebuchet. (Medieval rock flinger). -- Anon Guest

The substitute teacher, there for a month, didn't know shit about science. In fact, they had strong anti-science beliefs and would not easily be swayed on this. The school heard the classes' complaints and did exactly nothing about it.

So they got together during the lunch hour and plotted how to prove that science worked despite anyone's beliefs. "Okay. We got 'flat earth' and a gif of the earth turning isn't

Challenge #01756-D295: Equal Access

And you don't get your driver's license back until you've helped repair and restore a car for someone in need. And this was actually done to a group of young "Hoons" for acting like -well- "hoons". -- Knitnan

People tend to think that 'equal access' means denying something to the abled. Cutting down those with an advantage to the level of the disadvantaged. Removing something that is already there. Such can be the case, but it also involves improving things for those

Challenge #01750-D289: Confessions at a Bus Stop

Writer caught doing research, then realises 'captive audience'. -- Anon Guest

Officer René wasn't intending to be on duty. They were just chilling near the bus stop and not paying attention to anything much. Someone was already under the shelter and working on their laptop.

And then they heard the words, "No... that's too much decapitation. Uh... pierced jugular. Slow. Plenty of signs of blood spatter."

There are some things you hear that you're better off walking away from. There are some

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A 253-post collection

Challenge #01833-E009: Revenge is Purring

Challenge #01817-D356: Adulting Test

Challenge #01807-D346: For the Future

Challenge #01806-D345: A Mundane Permanence

Challenge #01805-D344: This Little Light...

Challenge #01793-D332: Hello, Goodbye...

Challenge #01792-D331: No Werewolves on the Moon

Challenge #01791-D330: Reserved Seating

Challenge #01777-D316: Worth Living Well

Challenge #01772-D311: The New Landlord

Challenge #01771-D310: Necessary Feature Creep

Challenge #01761-D300: Who You Choose to Be

Challenge #01757-D296: Flinging For Science

Challenge #01756-D295: Equal Access

Challenge #01750-D289: Confessions at a Bus Stop