Prompt

A 480-post collection

Challenge #00406 - A041: One Sad Afternoon on a Street Corner of NuFurria

Found another one

http://deathcomes4u.tumblr.com/post/73661805922/buggy-heichou-rotking-johnthedragon

Walking was a problem. And it was a problem because of Boxing.

When an owner got tired of their Uplift, or the cute Bull-Terrier/Wolf pup became too big, or it chewed the furniture or peed on things or otherwise acted like a dog who the owner hadn’t bothered to train… they were put in a box, and left on a corner, and told to wait for someone to take them home.

And every single time someone walked by, or slowed their car, the Boxed Uplift would look up in hope and optimism. Watch the humans who might own them pass. And wish.

Sometimes, they would get food from the kind-hearted. Sometimes, they would slink into the alleys and become a Stray. Sometimes, they would sit and wait in that box until they died of exposure or starvation or both.

One in twenty would get adopted into a home that wanted them. One in one hundred would actually find the loving home some boxes proclaimed they were free to.

Aelki had been writing reports about this to the Cogniscent Rights Committee for the better part of a Galactic Standard Year(1). As a Hitchhiker, there were morals and laws she had to uphold that went beyond the normal travel advisories.

The Rules of the Loyal Order of Hitchhikers were many, but the good ones managed to float upwards into the low numbers. Rules like, Don’t judge, or Don’t interfere were vitally necessary for survival, but the really good rule of, If you have to break the rules, break them good and hard, was an escape clause that a Hitchhiker could live with.

Aelki knew from watching that this particular Uplift was a chimera of wolf and any breed of dog known for its muscles. Bred or made for the arena and left on the corner with only the box to cover his dignity. There were no scars in his fur. Which only meant that the scars were on the inside.

This, she knew, would require the Big Towel. And more time on Nufurria, busking and storytelling and outright begging for a flight anywhere the heck away from Nufurria.

“Hi there,” she said to the big dog. He towered above her, even in a sitting position. “Would you like to come home with me?”

A smile full of fangs that could bring nightmares to any kind dentist. A frantically wagging tail. “Home please? Yes please! Clothes please?”

She helped him put a towel around his hips. Fastened it in place with a safety pin. “This will do for now. We need to go shopping for something that will fit you. I’m Aelki. What’s your name?”

Confused, the giant dog picked up the box he’d been sitting in and read -painfully- the first word he could understand. “Or… Oray… O'Ranges.”

She wanted to cry, but she had to smile. “Good boy. Let’s go on an adventure, hey?” The Cogniscent Rights Committee was going to hear about this even if she had to carry O'Ranges into their offices herself.

(1) Twenty-four hours in a Standard Day, ten Days in a Standard Week, four Weeks in a Standard Month and ten Months in a Standard Year. Only humans find this confusing.

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Challenge #00400 - A035: The Growing List of Things Rabbit Should Never Do Again

“And that’s when I discovered my hoodie could get stuck on my nose”

“She walked in-to a pole five times,” added Hatchworth.

“What? It was a fre-freindly p-p-pole.”

“Not that friendly,” noted The Spine. “It knocked half your face off.”

“It was t-t-t-t-tryin’ ta help, Th’ Spine. Not its fault it doesn’t have hands.”

“I did try to tell them that this was

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Challenge #00399 - A034: Creative Critiquing

An excellent “non-sequitur, thud”. 8.4, minus a 0.5 because you didn’t faceplant into the convenient messy food. 

When one has a real, live almost-human from Earth’s twentieth century as a resource, one can expect a certain amount of things. Revivals, for instance. Things got dredged up from the extensive lists of entertainment footage in possession of the Archivaas. T-shirts made a comeback when they really should have stayed away.

Disco came back from the

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Challenge #00398 - A033: Come for the Spectacle...

Inspired by this: http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/weird/NATL-Mom-Eats-Monstrous-Steak-in-Under-3-Minutes–239490021.html

Competitive eating may have been a thing before humans or it may not have, but they certainly made it more interesting: It suddenly jumped three rating warnings, and became a spectator sport for those brave enough to watch.

The first interspecies restaurant had a glass-walled enclosure for the humans. Polarized glass walls. Those who did not wish to view human eating habits could purchase or rent shields for their

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Challenge #00397 - A032: Performance Peace

The much anticipated performance piece entitled, ‘Ask a Rude Question, Get an Honest Answer

Naturally, it was a human who did it. The Galactic Congress, just getting used to the idea of humans as a recognised cogniscent and not a dangerous animal, attended in droves.

Even the common throng, who usually avoided ambassadorial exhibitions like the plague, attended.

Every performance was guaranteed to be unique, because every audience was a mixture of the curious and the vocal alike.

The artist sat in

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Challenge #00396 - A031: To Stop Human

After all those dramas and documentaries about how terrifying they were, you’d think somewhere it would have been mentioned how surprisingly ineffective stabbing was against humans.

(“multiple stab wounds” is a critical but in a lot of cases not actually immediately life threatening situation unless one hits a major blood vessel or one of the more important organs. Survivors with over 100 have happened a few times)

Taken from the Lectures of Koq'riix the Human Slayer:

They call

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Challenge #00395 - A030: Drunk Physics

They’re arguing in the manner of inebriated scientists, which is to say semi-incoherently, passionately, and with citations.”

“Na, na, na, na… ‘E wasnae sayin’ tha’ black holes don’t exist… 'E was sayin’ th’ math w’s easier if'n they didn’t.”

“But that’s… that’s… that’s… thassnot the quote pipple use…”

“Aye, an&

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Challenge #00394 - A029: It Came From Planet Earth

*totally wasn’t rereading old daily stories for art ideas, nope not me*

You’ve got a few titles for the horror movies, books, tv shows and assorted media starring humans before proper first contact was made scattered in the daily drabbles, may we see one?

[AN: Of course I’m not going to write the whole thing]

They thought they were safe inside the base. But then, they thought that sprinkling their crops with capsaicin would stop the

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Challenge #00393 - A028:

The Dragon and the Banana

Redscale the Magnificent landed in a clearing near the adorable little village with the thatched-roofed cottages and blew a plume of fire into the air.

“Deliver your gold to me or face the consequences,” she roared.

Her cunning plan was immediately foiled by a native asking, “What’s gold?”

Redscale the Magnificent attempted to explain. “Uh… It’s shiny. Yellow. Comes out of the ground. Most of you squishy

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Challenge #00392 - A027: Interspecies Relationships

“I think its cute how a human’s normal reaction to a loud noise is to make a loud noise back”

Love is many things, as a great writer once wrote, none of them logical.

This is true across the species, but with the humans? Only more so.

K'iiv had been holding the Noise back until his beloved mammal, Del, was fully awake and not holding anything hot or spill-able.

“I pretty much have to do the thing,

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Challenge #00391 - A026: Ride the Pony

It says something about us as a species that we can see the most badass creature in any given biome, the one that not even the top predators will go near, and decide “I am going to ride that.”

They should never have gone planet-side, no matter how much Hwell complained about ‘cabin fever’. And, once they went planet-side, they definitely didn’t have to go on a tour.

And they certainly should never have gone on

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Challenge #00390 - A025: Ferocious Flavour

Something about the other alien species and the sheer amounts of food that humans eat that would digest us alive if we didn’t digest them first. Maybe a human explaining why we want that legalised to be imported on to a space station (because nobody likes eating nothing but space bran flakes)

“Council will hear…” T'rev moaned. “The Human Coalition.”

“As secretary of the Human Coalition on this station, I receive numerous petitions and

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Challenge #00389 - A024: Killer Mutant Zombie Human

“You know, considering how resilient humans are most of the time it’s a bit surprising that their reproductive system is so unprotected, especially the males.”

*pained moaning from just offscreen* 

This was beyond surreal. Sitting next to a human (well, technically human) and watching an ancient, speciesist movie with a human starring as the main antagonist. With the unbelievable knowledge that the human had instigated this.

He had asked why, but her answer made no sense. “Because

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Challenge #00385 - A020: Best Frienemies

Any lingering animosity between them vanished, replaced by a combined resolve to horribly embarrass their sons.!

"KNEEL, PUNY MORTALS!”

“Da-a-a-a-ad…”

“AVAUNT, MISCREANT!”

“Da-a-a-a-ad…”

Two sons shared a sympathetic look of mutual mortification as their parents started a war in the parking lot of their new grade school. Both wanted, but lacked the power, to dig themselves a foxhole in the tarmac and never come out again.

The rest of the playground

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Challenge #00384 - A019: Seriously?

a particularly nasty paradox tangle involving one monstrous salamander, sixteen copies of a popular children’s book, and a length of lead pipe”

“No. I heard it was Kudzu, unrestrained cheese and a goldfish.”

“No way. It was mouldy bread, a pile of newsprint and a tribe of cusp-cogniscent mice.”

“I swear it was the one about the hippopotamus, the hedge and the piano.”

“I thought it was just a blockage in a

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