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Challenge #00260: Bubbles in History

Since you like Adventure Time (and I hope you’ve seen some of the more recent episodes, minor spoilers in prompt)

Bubblegum: Journey from Irradiated Pink Ooze to the founder of a Kingdom.

[AN: Warning - Rampant headcannon ahead]

See…

A wrecked city. It used to be called Cincinnati, before the bombs fell. The survivors braved its depths for supplies. Useful things. Food. Metals.

Feel…

It hurt to be alive. She was alive. She couldn’t leave. She was quite literally stuck here.

Fragmented memories of before the bomb. Candy store. An argument with someone. Someone special. Science. She had science to do…

Move…

She could move. She could see… but her body.

Her body wasn’t human any more.

She… had become…

Gum.

Pink, gooey, bubblegum.

But she could move. Spread. Shrink. Let things go. Coalesce. It took her days, but the world had just ended. It wasn’t as if anyone wanted gum.

*

He was here! The someone.

Simon!

She had no voice, but she could hear. He had a sick child. He needed chicken soup.

She spread tendrils of herself into the places that the survivors couldn’t go. Or wouldn’t go, because of the mutated goo-monsters still here.

Found… 

One can of soup. One can-opener.

Found…

Him in the alley. Defeating the evil crown through an effort of will.

Offered the prize to him. Managed a face. A smile.

“Euw…”

Right. She was gooey stretches of bubblegum. Nobody found that nice. She retreated. Left him alone.

He still had the crown.

She didn’t remember much, but as long as he had the crown, he could hurt her. He had hurt her.

She would have to devise a more efficient manner of communicating.

*

Simon’s storm had changed something. The goo and the cold and the high-fructose corn syrup and who knew what else had come together in a perfect storm.

Life sprang anew in the wreckage of Cincinnati.

Candy life.

She worked hard on making a body. A body she half-remembered from Before. There was too much ‘hair’, but she had a solution.

Cut it. Roll it into the new sugar compounds. Store it. Just in case.

They could hatch. They could become cogniscent clones of herself. She just didn’t know.

*

Candy life could be shaped. Could be trained. They called her a Princess. One even found an amulet in the old ruins under her realm. It had interesting properties, which she had to study in secret.

Candy was an interesting building material. Fruitcake walls were going to protect her sweet life forms. Her children.

Simon and I wanted to have children

No. She wasn’t that half-remembered woman, any more. Things had changed. The whole world had changed.

Cats and dogs both were walking upright and talking. They were building societies of their own.

Humans were anarchic gangs. Some had gone underground. Literally. Some were spawning new species.

Goblins and Orcs and Trolls. Giants and Minotaurs.

Practically the entire D&D compendium.

The mutagen had to be to blame. It was literally running through the entirety of the land. She had to do something to stop it. Contain it. Perhaps, stabilize the population.

And all she had to hand was candy.

“Princess! Princess!”

They were summoning her. Someone was in trouble. Someone outside the fruitcake walls.

*

The amulet was gone. She had to rely on other means to create things. At least the gumball guardians were doing their job.

Candy lasted.

The power of the mutagen turned everything in a limited area into candy, but at least it wasn’t toxic to other life.

There was a large area of cold, relatively close to her candy kingdom. She thought she knew what it was, but she was just too busy.

Other kingdoms demanded her time. Demanded her attention. Demanded negotiations.

She was just so busy.

She needed a hero. And candy folk weren’t so naturally inclined.

If the dogs weren’t so busy with that war in the crystal dimension…

If the cats weren’t mostly evil…

If ifs and ands were pots and pans… She rolled her eyes. First, forge peace. Then, get on with her discoveries.

If she could figure out the new rules to this messed-up world, then she could work to fix it.

*

He’d found her again. Just when she’d got comfortable.

He’d changed. He didn’t remember anything of Before and she wasn’t about to tell him, either.

She’d let herself get soft.

And all she could do was scream.

Wait. There in the snow. A boy and his dog. Or a dog and his boy. They were the only ones close to hand. The only ones within earshot.

They were her only hope.

*

They were brothers. Finn and Jake. They lived in a treehouse not far from her kingdom. Finn may well be the last true-human on Ooo.

She wanted to study him. Scientifically.

Analyse whether or not the human race deserved a second chance. Or let him live as a hero and let the humans who once ruined this world go out in a blaze of glory.

Time would tell.

And for a very young boy, Finn was kind of cute.

Stop.

She was far too old for him.

…far too old…

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"Well, Sweetie..."

“Mommy, how did you meet Daddy?”

(#00259)

He blushed. “Uh…” He glanced over at Edi. Edi nodded.

“Well… I was naked at the time…”

“Da-a-a-ad….”

“No, he’s telling the truth. Daddy wasn’t wearing so much as one red stitch.”

“There was the band-aid. That was technically cloth.”

“It was on your left shoulder. It doesn’t count as clothes.”

Read more »

Challenge #00257: What a Wonderful World

When truly equity is nurtured upon Mother Earth between the genders (Again, because I’m thinking of MLK.)

“So… Mari. Is that one a he or a she?”

“Gram-MAAAA…” Mari blushed. “You promised…”

“I did, I did. I’m sorry. I forgot.”

“I only let you be my show-and-tell ‘cause you promised you wouldn’t do any of the old-fashioned stuff.”

Gramma nodded. “I

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"Why We Won't Stop Fighting For Our Right To Purity"

Someone with an ARTICULATELY RATIONAL reason for detesting Sara and waging futile jihad against mutants because of her. (Just because I’m feeling deep in my ‘Sympathy for the Devil’ phase today being the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington.) Something akin to what Luther did on the doorframe would be nice as well.

(#00256)

The photo showed a slightly-horsey girl with green-blue scales. She was smiling, but not looking at the camera. The resolution made it clear

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Challenge #00255: The wall and the Hypocri-sea.

The invisible fence, 15 feet high that divides the America that lectures others on “multiculturalism”.

It was a rich white girls’ party. Anyone watching the video could tell. It wasn’t in a house. It wasn’t even in a mansion. It was in a palace. The theme was multiculturalism.

She was wearing sexy lederhosen with a chinese shirt and Inca shoes. She also sported a rainbow sombrero and a necklace made of ‘fangs’.

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Challenge #00254: Honey, and Plenty of Money

Bees.

[AN: Any relationship between certain corporations in this fiction and certain poison companies is strictly imaginary]

Fantraxin did not kill bees. That was its primary selling point. It killed all other insects that may predate on crops, but not the bees. How it did so, of course, was a company secret.

A secret that made them the largest corporation on the planet, almost overnight.

Or, at least, it would have. If they weren’t already the biggest global power ever

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Challenge #00253: I'm Sorry, We Can't Help You

Greater Deregulation’s more esoteric moments.

“But I don’t have any of my papers. My house burned down.”

“If you had signed up for the TrakMe program…”

“I had. My parents signed me up just after I got a name. I’ve been trying to sign on with or without their help for forty years.”

“You can voluntarily sign up for the TrakMe program at any time,” recited the

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Challenge #00252: Be Careful What You Wish For

Agent Pertwee and the first moments he realized that his job sucked for reasons he didn’t expect.

[AN: Once again, it’s Jane Pertwee :) ]

The FBI had been covertly watching this school for some time. Now, with the Mutant Registration Act, it was watching more overtly. As in, agents in the field, tailing their respective suspects, and making sure that a bunch of teenagers with superpowers….

Well…

Didn’t wind up acting like a bunch of

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Challenge #00251: Terror Watch

Agent Pertwee and his take on watching the terror with the textiles.

[AN: Agent Pertwee is a girl :P]

Agent Jane Pertwee sighed. She’d signed up for Terror Watch because it was the fast-track past the glass ceiling and on to better things. She should have known that the dicks upstairs would have picked the one least likely to do anything worthy of garnering promotion by stopping it in its tracks.

Right now, she was holding up a wall watching

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Challenge #00250: Birds of a Feather

Kitty/alwaysfemale!Colossus.

“I’m here!” Kitty announced. This was supposed to be a place full of people like her. Like, where was the welcome committee?

BAMF! “Ah, hubches madchen,” A blue demon in a black and red outfit appeared in an almost stereotypical puff of sulphurous smoke. “Pleased to make your acquaintance,” it reached for her with a freakish, three-fingered hand.

Kitty screamed.

A giant, metal hand held off the demon by encapsulating its

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Challenge #00249: What Monsters Hath Science Wrought?

Catbug.

Mythos Entertainment Inc. was working on all manner of new things. Their bio-labs were cooking up foetuses at the rate of knots.

Graham Ptolowitz stared at the thing in the pen. This was the angel/fairy production team, and the abomination before him had originally been a cat.

“We were working on a hexapodal mammalian life-form,” said Dewitt. “So splicing and activating the hexapodal gene was primary priority.”

“We did attempt bat wings, since they are

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Challenge #00248: More Deadlier...

Magnificently mundane…and yet still formidable.

It is said that women are like tea leaves. You don’t know how strong they can be until you put them in hot water. Mavis had always laughed at that. She was as mild as milk! Meek as mud.

Until the invaders came.

She’d just turned her back for a second. Let go of the pram for just long enough to grab a can of beans. And when she turned back,

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Challenge #00247: Craftsmanship

Ordinary excellence.

“If you want it to last long, hire an expert. If you want it to last for long enough, hire a JOAT.” – Galactic saying.

Rael got most of his income from people who wanted their patches to last long enough. As in, long enough to make a profit out of this trip. Or, long enough to get me back home. And, in some cases, long enough so I can trade this heap in for maximum due.

He

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Challenge #00246: Meter and Rhyme

Professor Xavier on why he abandoned the idea of a institute theme song.

“Professor? Why isn’t there a school song?”

“To be very brief, I couldn’t come up with anything good,” he confessed. “Begin with the fact that the Institute doesn’t have a catchy name, and add to that the fact that I have all the musical talents of a diseased whelk…” he shrugged. “If you can come

Read more »