Young, wannabe pirates steal a ship. The human aboard refuses to hurt kids, but they are NOT amused! -- Anon Guest
"What are you, twelve?" Human Oz glared down at the 'dread pirate' Bao, who had a kitten face on their overalls pocket. "I'm old enough to be your grandren[1]. I should send you to the corner."
"I'm eight," said the 'dread pirate' Bao. "And I'm the Captain 'cause of my mean scar, and you're s'posed to surrender." The 'mean scar' was a light graze on one cheek, possibly caused by a low-flying stick fragment. Previously unnoticed until they pointed it out. This did not improve anything.
"That makes it worse," said Oz. "You understand how that makes it worse, right? Where are your guardians? Do they know you and your little playmates took a whole-ass tug boat to play Pirates in?" Further parenting instincts kicked in and made hir say, "Has anyone put antiseptic on your boo-boo?"
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