Challenge #00811-B080: Horror Cuisine

The unthinking introduction of an omlette to a birdlike alien species.

“What are orbs?” said the assigned Human Watcher. So far, it hadn’t been as dangerous or nasty as she’d been lead to believe. Ri’ki’ki was starting to believe that all the stories were just… stories.

“Eggs,” said the human. Her name was Sta-see. Or something close enough. She was organising her little kitchen according to her own rules.

“You having egg in stasis? They is never hatch.”

“They is never meaning hatch. Is food. Not baby.“

“You eating egg?” Ri’ki’ki yawped.

“Knowing much differing. Baby egg not food. These egg is food. Much differing. Smart ape no eat babies.” Sta-see drew an X over her chest, indicating a vulnerable point. “This egg sterile. No baby. Guaranteed.“

“Who is make?” Ri’ki’ki asked suspiciously.

The human bought out her infopad and pulled out a picture. “This make eggs. Terran bird, stupid bird. Humans keep for make food. Yes?”

It looked almost like one of Ri’ki’ki’s ancient ancestors. Troubling, indeed, how parallel evolution could make things like this happen. The companion footage clearly showed an animal. Not even a cusp-cogniscent being.

Sta-see pulled a pan out of her little oven and transferred the contents to her plate. Then added some irradiated cheese to the top. The product looked and smelled delicious.

Ri’ki’ki knew better than to try untested human food. These deathworlders could happily ingest flesh-eating enzymes and call it a flavour. “What is food?”

Sta-see bit one of her rubbery lips. “Um…” she said. “Please be understand, self is wait much long time. Wait in anticipation, food of home.”

Uh oh. She was apologising already. Which meant that this could be perceived as bad. “Sta-see… why is two place empty in egg pod?”

“Is calling ‘omelette’. Making of egg. And other things. But first, egg.”

And that was how all the rumours started.

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