It was once said that “with enough fried onions and mustard people would eat anything.” This has also been proven to apply to the additions of either chocolate or bacon.
Frankly, as it has been quite a long time since humanity first wound up discovering these multipurpose edibles, it’s often considered a great wonder that human civilization has not yet managed to eat itself to death, either by the direct sense of gorging and gluttony, or by the indirect sense of simply running out of other things to apply said universal condiments to and turning on each other in cannibalistic frenzy.The idea that other cogniscents might theoretically have some species-suitable equivalents to these near-addictive culinary wonders, and simply have not yet discovered them, is thus understandably somewhat frightening to many of them.
The sample laid before them looked like brown, square blobs. It did not look appetising. It did not smell appetising. Nik, at least, had the
decency to look embarrassed.
“You have to understand it’s a work
in progress,” said Nik. “I’ve been working on the theory that certain
addictive foods, put together, could become the ultimate super food.”
Rael poked it uncertainly. “Are you certain it’s edible?”
Shayde
picked up one and gave in experimental nibble. “It’s got chocolate on
it,” she declared. She chewed a little more. “Is that bacon?”
Nik smiled nervously, “It is, it is! It is caramelised onion, on top of a square of bacon, wrapped in chocolate.“
Rael
tried a more adventurous bite. The face he made was not the one Nik was
hoping for. He could see Nick’s face crumbling in disappointment at
Rael’s disgust.
“Did ye fry the bacon in maple syrup?” asked Shayde.
“Of course,” said Nick. “It is expected when making sweets.”
“That’s
where you went wrong,” she began to pontificate. “Chocolate goes best
with bitter things, ye ken. You’ve got your chocolate coated
strawberries, your chocolate fondue, all that noise. You much sweet with
bitter, you’re golden.”
“Ah,” Nik began to smile again. “I went wrong by making it all sweet, you say.”
“Aye, that and you left out the cheese.“
Rael began to quietly creep away, these two were dangerous.
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