An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Reincarnation v. the Evo crew.
A new Korean restaurant opens up near the X-Mansion. Todd discovers beondegi.
(#00174)
“I know it’s cheap to eat here, but god damn… who wants to eat this crap?”
“Koreans, maybe?” said Todd. “Look, jus’ try a few things a’ight? Koreans eat it an’ live.“
"I don’t eat anything I can’t identify,” said Pietro.
“I stopped listening at ‘all you can eat’,” said Freddy. He was already taking a sampler.
“Heywow… How’d they get all the little lines on
Read more »Challenge #00172: One Fine Afternoon in the Halls of Higher Education
“When I said that it was nice that you could recite the same dirty limerick in 5 different languages and have it rhyme, I was not asking for a demonstration.”
“Aaaw… but I’m almost up to Pharsi. Do you know how hard it is to rhyme ‘Calcutta’ in Pharsi?”
“No, and I don’t particularly care. We’re supposed to be working on theoretical math, not filthy poetry.”
“…aaaaawwww…”
“Fo-cusss…”
“But this isn’t as much fun.”
“Ai! Focus.”
Sara pouted.
Non Compos Mentis
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
The things I come up with when a blackout hits…
Read more »Why Kurt is banned from trying anything he "saw Onkel Wolf do once"
(#00168)
“Kurt, what are you doing?”
“Who? Me?” he quickly hid his hands behind his back. “Nothing much.”
“Isn’t that Todd’s locker?”
Kurt gained a sick and desperate grin. “Why would I be doing something to Todd Tolenski’s locker? It certainly has nothing to do with any interesting kind of prank war.”
Jean glared at him. “You do know you are trying to lie to a telepath…”
“It’s okay. I saw Onkel Wolf do this, once…”
After the
Read more »The Brotherhood make a Youtube video that goes viral
(#00167)
“I’munna do it!” the camera dodges through a dark interior, into the bright, snow-filled landscape.
“Don’t fucking do it!” This speaker is the owner of a greasy mullet and wears shirtsleeves and a vest even in the middle of winter. “I swear to God, Toad…“
“I’munna DO it!” the camera pans up to find a skinny boy in a toboggan perched precariously on the roof of a three-storey house.
“How did he even get up there?
Read more »Sara + Kickstarter
(#00166)
“Hi,” said the slightly horsey androgene on the screen. “I’m Sara, but most know me online as TheTallest. I work with the indie film studio Thylacine Films. You might know us from such things as this—”
The dance of the dead hallucination scene from _Gopocalypse, Go, Go!_
“And this—”
The town destruction scene from _It Came From The Other Side_.
“And this—”
Everyone’s favourite scene from _All My Zombies_.
“I’m used to working under the red line, but
Read more »Why Kurt Wagner was banned from Show-And-Tell
(#00164)
There is a rule in classrooms all over the world. When it’s Show and Tell day, beware the kid with the cardboard box. Or the self-motive brown paper bag.
This time, it was Kurt ‘that weirdo’ Wagner with the cardboard box and the optimistic grin.
His record said he used to work in a circus, and you could believe it, the way he oversold all his presentations with carney-level breathless superlatives.
“Ladies and Gentlemen—”
“Let’s skip the preamble, Wagner.
Read more »Why the X-Men aren't putting on musicals anymore.
(#00162)
“Okay, so let’s recap. The lead’s got ‘lurgi’, our soprano has a frog in her throat from the same thing, our harpist is having a nervous breakdown..”
“Fifth this week,”
“And thanks to a fight in the school grounds, the tenor has a broken arm.”
“That and the costumes have gone missing, the lighting’s mis-wired, half the backdrops have been accidentally used by the local kindergarten as a mural, and someone’s meticulously disassembled the props.”
“Do we
Read more »Jean decides to go for the special award for community service offered by Bayville High in exchange for 200 hours of volunteering. Xavier...
(#00159)
“The prize is a car,” said Jean. “You have no idea what that means for me.”
“There’s something wrong with my car?” said Scott.
“Yeah, I have to go where you want to take me. I’m going for it.”
*
Jean opened the little envelope. “Looks like I’m a candy-striper at the veterans home. Huh.”
“Hooray,” deadpanned Kurt. “Bedpans and unwanted PDA’s from old folks.”
“Ignore him,” said Kitty. “He’s still bitter about the whole animal shelter
Read more »A Singular Day
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Headcannon backstoriness and insanity :)
Read more »"Due to last year's incident involving "The Ballad of Cemetery Sue", the lyrics and/or script of any act in the talent show must be approved...
(#00154)
The entire nerd portion of the school moaned in disappointment. They all knew what it meant. The next talent show would be stripped, pasteurized, sanitized and otherwise made dull, bland, and completely boring.
“And I was going to juggle a chainsaw, a bowling ball, and a fresh egg,” whined Kurt.
Only one was cackling.
“Sara, no-o-o-o-o-o…” said Todd, possibly on automatic.
“But I was going to give them exactly what they wanted, and nothing of what they asked for,” protested Sara.
Read more »Iron Chef: X-Mansion!
(#00149)
Sara really should not have sung. That had been the ultimate bone of contention. Especially since it was _Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better_.
Amara would not back down. Neither would Sara.
So now the danger room had been set up as two identical kitchens, and a black neutral zone between them. Randomizers were set to pick random ingredients from anywhere in the world, and raise them up into the neutral zone for the competitors to use.
The dias
Read more »Geeky Mutants + Danger Room = Holodeck-style shenanigans.
(#00147)
Logan stared at the view from the observation port. The brats were battling on twin dirigibles. One team with blue bandannas, the other with red. There were swords, steampunk machines, flying apes, strange beasts and… orchestral music?
Elf was enjoying every last minute of it.
“Have at thee, foul miscreants,” he cried, swinging all over the place like a monkey on a bender. “However many you may be, you can not match the heart of a true musketeer.”
Tallwater was singing
Read more »FicWar Prompt? If you're still taking them? :) Kurt struggling through grievous injury to help his friends in a dire situation.
(#00141)
[AN: Yes, I am taking ficwar prompts. I’m doing one story a day, every day, for as long as humanly possible. Give me lots of prompts. Feed the beast ;) ]
Friends. His friends were trapped. Kurt tried to get up, and was rewarded by searing pain. He dropped back down. Okay. Think. This wasn’t the first time he’d been unable to use his legs. Last time, they’d been burned.
Bloody Winzeldorf.
His faithful tail still worked, though some
Read more »